Rookie of the Year 4-Way: Alexis Bledel, Lacey Chabert, Scarlett Johansson, Michelle Trachtenberg by The Walkin Dude

Greetings friends, it’s your nameless narrator again, sitting ringside tonight in the venerable old Yellow Sign Tavern in Arkham Massachusetts. Normally I’d try to entertain you with my own unique brand of pre-match commentary, but tonight there’s a lot to be done before the match begins and someone more important than I wants to be the one that explains it to you. In fact, his music should be hitting in just a few moments, so I’ll shut up and let him do the talking. Seconds later, the opening chords of ‘You Wouldn’t Believe’, roars through the tavern and Richard Fannin makes his way quickly to ringside as the Announcer introduces his employer.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, here to introduce the participants for tonight’s Main event, he is Richard Fannin!” The promoter had slipped into the ring by then, thanking the Announcer for his services as he took the mic. Listening to his music for a few more moments, Fannin cut the music and brought the microphone up to speak.

“Good evening folks. Normally I wouldn’t step on our esteemed Announcer’s toes but this is a special occasion and sometimes I just like to hear myself talk. That being said, this is indeed the Main Event, a Fatal Four Way Match, the winner of which will be named the 2005 Rookie of the Year.” Pausing to let the cheers die down, he continued, “The winner of this match will receive many rewards, including a hundred thousand dollar bonus, that magnificent trophy… (He pointed to the large award waiting on a table at ringside).

“And perhaps most importantly, a contract that let’s them name a match of their own devising against an opponent of their choosing, with the exception of World Title shot. And there’s one other reward floating around…if anyone NOT named Scarlett Johansson eliminates Scarlett Johansson, she or they will receive an additional ten thousand dollars. But that’s enough talk, lets bring out the participants. Introducing first, she stands 5’5” and she is…Alexis Bledel!”

‘Cells’ by The Servant hums into existence and the lean brunette makes her way through the curtain and down the ramp. For her battle this evening, Alexis is clad in a simple (but in no means unflattering) midnight blue tankini with white piping along the edges. Her look is completed with matching dark blue pads and boots.

Watching Alexis slide into the ring and go to her corner, Rich continued, “And her opponent, standing 5’3”…she is Lacey Chabert!” ’Short Skirt, Long Jacket’ pulses through the speakers and Lacey is through the curtain in a flash, strutting to ringside in her typical attire of an orange bikini top and black bikini bottoms. Matching black boots and black pads with orange trim tops off her look.

Catching his breath, Fannin resumes his shtick,. “And their opponent, she stands at 5’4”, allow me to present, Scarlett Johansson!” ‘Remedy’ crunches to life and Scarlett saunters through the curtain and towards the ring, clad as usual in a simple black bikini and matching gray pads.

Seeing three quarters of the talent assembled, Richard finished his obligation, “And last but not least…at 5’7” tall, ladies and gentlemen, I give you…Michelle Trachtenberg!” The staccato opening of ‘Little Sister’ plays through the Yellow Sign as the auburn haired beauty makes her way to ringside, clad in her usual battle attire of a two-piece teal bikini and matching white boots and pads.

Seeing that his services would not be required until the end of the match, Rich quickly exited the ring and took a seat by the trophy, anticipating the opening bell as much as anyone else in attendance. The bell sounded and the match began. But for several seconds, none of the ladies made any move to leave their corners. A moment later, Alexis moved tentatively from her sanctum, eyes trained on Scarlett. Watching the brunette carefully, Scarlett stalked out of her corner, dropping into a crouch as she did so. The blonde had no illusions about this match; there was a bounty on her head big enough that the other three would come gunning for her first.

Curling her fingers as she advanced on her blue-eyed foe, she snarled quietly, “All right Alexis, since you were brave enough to start, I’ll put you down quick. Bring it on little girl.”

A calculating grin crossed Alexis’ face. Dropping into a crouch of her own, she moved forward a half step and replied, “Sorry Scarlett, I’m not going to have the pleasure of having the first crack at you.” She pointed over the blonde’s right shoulder. “They are!” Scarlett’s eyes widened and she cursed herself over how easily she’d fallen for the ploy. Whirling on her heel, she had less than a second to get her hands up to protect her face before Lacey and Michelle knocked her head over heels with a Tandem Clothesline. Scarlett hit the canvas with a groan and tried to roll away from her three attackers, but she’d only made it a few feet before Michelle grabbed her by the hair and yanked her to her feet.

Sneering into her old rival’s ace, Michelle asked, “Where you going Red? You’re not trying to leave already are you?”

Scarlett was going to mutter a reply when her free arm was grabbed by Lacey who added her own comment to the proceedings, “Ya know Scarlett, it wouldn’t be fair if Alexis didn’t get to hit you; after all, we’re ALL going to get that bonus.”

“I couldn’t agree more!” Michelle said saccharinely. “Here Alexis, have yourself some fun.”

Both brunette’s grabbed Scarlett by her wrists and whipped her towards Alexis who had positioned herself by the edge of the ring. As the dazed blonde stumbled toward her, Alexis lowered a shoulder and waited. The moment she felt Scarlett’s belly touch her, she shoved up with all her might, hurling the hapless girl over the top rope with a Back Body Drop. Scarlett sailed through the air and hit the mats outside with a sickening THUD. Although Scarlett took the landing as well as can be expected, still she stayed down for the better part of ten seconds before she got to her feet, checked herself for injuries and turned her attention back to the three brunette’s watching her from the squared circle. Taking a second to pull her tights back into place, Scarlett climbed back up onto the apron where she stopped and beckoning to her three foes.

“C’mon and get me you sluts. I’m gonna outlast every last one of ya!”

Lacey and Michelle took this as a personal challenge and they streaked forward, aiming to grab Scarlett by the hair and haul her back into the ring. But Scarlett had a plan of her own and it worked to perfection. When the two brunettes’ were in striking range, Scarlett shot out both talons and Face Raked her rival’s faces, blinding them for a second. That instant was all Scarlett needed to grab hold of a handful of dark hair and send Lacey ramming headfirst into Michelle. Lacey and Michelle uttered a little grunt of pain as their skulls cracked together and they went down in a heap next to each other. Knowing this was her chance; Scarlett slipped through the bottom ropes and set her sights on Alexis who was rapidly cutting the distance between herself and the blonde.

“You’re mine baby.” Scarlett cooed as she planted her feet and roared forward, lowering her shoulder at the last second and nearly cutting the remaining brunette in half with a wicked Spear.

Kneeling over Alexis’ mewling form, Scarlett knew she couldn’t use her normal finishers until there was only one of her rivals left. Seeing that Michelle and Lacey were still down, Scarlett draped herself across Alexis and hooked both legs, screaming at the ref to count as she did so. The Ref was more than up to this task and his count was two thirds over when Scarlett was yanked off her prey, not because Alexis kicked out, but because someone had gripped her by the ankles and yanked the blonde off her prize. Grunting in pain as she was jerked across the mat, Scarlett kicked free and rolled to her feet, glaring at her old rival as she did so.

“Trachtenberg!” Scarlett spat. “I should’ve known it’d be you.”

Michelle glared back and replied, “Sorry Scar, I would’ve broken it up sooner, but I had to slap some sense into that klutz Lacey.”

Before Scarlett could reply, Lacey appeared to Michelle’s left and hissed, “Watch your mouth Michelle. As soon as this bitch is done for, you and I are going to have words.”

Michelle rolled her eyes and fixed her gaze back on the blonde as both she and Lacey advanced forward. Scarlett dropped low and was about to lunge forward when she was gripped from behind and spun around, only to find herself staring into the furious eyes of Alexis Bledel.

“I believe I owe you one.” Alexis whispered just as she drove a fist into Scarlett’s cheek. The blonde cried out and staggered around, only to find herself on the receiving end of punches from Michelle and Lacey before she was knocked back to Alexis again. Alexis was in no way tired of this little game and she blasted Scarlett across the face once more, sending her back towards Lacey and Michelle. As the other brunettes got their licks, in Alexis called out, “Drop-kick on three! One, two, THREE!” In an amazing display of coordination, all three brunettes left their feet simultaneously and drove their boots into Scarlett from all sides, the force of the kicks actually holding her upright for a second before she collapsed to the mat. Tired of dealing with the blonde, Alexis looked at the other two and said, “Let’s end this pretender!”

They agreed and they all piled onto Scarlett, looking to toss her out of the match and make this match back into the Triple Threat it was supposed to be. Astoundingly, Scarlett was able to get her shoulder off the mat before the final count. Genuinely surprised, the brunette’s backed up and circled the blonde, waiting for her to get to her feet. A moment later, she obliged them and regained her vertical base.

Turning in a cautious circle, Scarlett fixed her gaze on Alexis and taunted, “Care and take me head on this time coward?”

Alexis didn’t take kindly to that little insinuation and she lunged forward with arm extended, but Scarlett stepped nimbly aside and watched with satisfaction as Alexis’ wayward clothesline struck Michelle across the chest. Taking no more time to savor their collision, Scarlett whirled to face Lacey right as the shorter girl was breathing down her neck. Acting on instinct, Scarlett got her hands up into Lacey’s face and raked as hard as she could, scoring the brunette’s pretty face with her talons. Stalking after Lacey as she staggered away, Scarlett whirled her around and trapped her in a Front Face Lock before falling backwards to drive her prey’s skull into the mat. With the DDT administered, Scarlett muscled Lacey onto her back and went for the cover. This time the ref had only counted to one before Michelle and Alexis hauled Scarlett off her victim. Yanking the cagey blonde to her feet, Michelle buried a fist in her gut to double her over.

As Scarlett gasped in front of her, Michelle purred, “Nice try Red, but the 3 of us are willing to put off tearing into each other until you’re out of the picture.”

Picking up on Michelle’s train of thought, Alexis said, “ We’re gonna teach you to meddle in things that don’t concern you.” Speaking no more, the two brunettes trapped their foe in a tandem Front Face Lock before tossing both Scarlett’s arms over their respective shoulders. Alexis and Michelle each grabbed a handful of black tights and pulled upwards, hauling Scarlett over their heads. They held her there for a moment before falling backwards to complete the Double Vertical Suplex.

Scarlett’s back arched when she hit the mat, and her two tormentors had barely got to their feet when Lacey bounced off the ropes and nailed a perfect Leg Drop across, Scarlett’s throat. Rolling to one knee, Lacey glared at the others and said, “Get her!” Alexis didn’t need to be told twice and she bounced off the ropes before driving a hard Elbow Drop into Scarlett’s breasts. Rolling clear, Alexis watched as Michelle ran the ropes and leapt into the air, coming down with all her weight across the Strawberry blonde’s midsection with a Splash. Scarlett heaved on impact, but couldn’t dislodge Michelle and the brunette looked to end Scarlett’s run in the match right there by going for the cover. The ref got to “TWO!” before Michelle was jerked off her prize by her compatriots.

Glaring at Alexis and Lacey she hissed, “What’re you stupid? She’s done for, lemme pin her!”

Lacey retorted, “Nuh-uh. We ALL pin her, that’s the deal. The money is inconsequential but we all did the work to take her out, we all deserve the credit.”

Alexis nodded, “Don’t be selfish Michelle. We all work together for now and taking her out won’t be a problem.”

Michelle resisted the urge to just belt the others, truce or not, but she refrained. “Fine,” she muttered. “Let’s finish her.”

“Easier said than done!” a voice hissed from behind them. Startled, the three beauties were in the middle of turning to face that voice when Scarlett plowed into them, taking all of ‘em off their feet with her Flying Clothesline. Scarlett was trying to go for a cover on Michelle, but though her sneak attack had taken her rivals off their feet, it hadn’t taken very much fight out of them and Michelle illustrated this point by pushing free just after the one. Shoving Scarlett off her, Michelle got to her feet and stalked over to her wounded nemesis. Pulling Scarlett to her feet, Michelle reared back and buried her right knee in Scarlett’s belly, just above the low cut line of her briefs. Scarlett seemed to deflate and she slumped forward, almost gagging as Michelle pulled her back upright.

Holding the blonde tightly around the waist, Michelle called out, “Alexis, come grab her arm! Lacey, stay where you are.” Alexis joined the fray, grabbing hold of Scarlett’s right arm as Michelle took hold of her left. Directing the blonde around so that she was facing towards Lacey, Michelle called out, “Rearrange her face Lacey!”

Lacey nodded in understanding as the other brunettes whipped Scarlett towards her. Stepping forward to meet the blonde, Lacey wrapped her right arm over Scarlett’s left shoulder while her left arm snaked under Scarlett’s right shoulder, the brunette clasping her hands together when they met between Scarlett’s shoulder blades. Not hesitating an instant, Lacey pulled backwards and fell, driving Scarlett face first into the ring with one of her favorite finishers, the 'IFR' (or Instantaneous Facial Reconstruction for those not in the know).

Normally Lacey would have gone for the cover, but she had an idea of what Michelle wanted, so she pulled Scarlett back to her feet and held her prone as she looked at Alexis. “You wanna have the Last Word?”

Alexis dropped to one knee and extended her right arm toward Scarlett and with her blue eyes sparkling, responded, “It’ll be second to last in this case, but I don’t mind. Send her my way.”

Lacey nodded and whipped Scarlett toward the crouched brunette. When Scarlett was less than two feet away from her, the kneeling brunette struck, leaping off her feet in one smooth motion. At the height of her jump, Alexis wrapped her right arm behind Scarlett’s neck, pulling her off balance. In the same instant, gravity came into play and Alexis fell to the mat, driving her foe face first into the canvas with the scintillating Neckbreaker / DDT variation she called ‘The Last Word.’ Hearing Scarlett’s head bounce off the canvas, Alexis rose to one knee and raised her arms over her head, a sure sign that she knew the blonde as done. Well Scarlett might have been done, but the brunettes weren’t. Scarlett had been on the mat for less than five seconds when Alexis pulled her up and pointed her in Michelle’s direction.

Locking eyes with the auburn-haired girl, Alexis called, “She’s your nemesis; seems only fitting.”

Michelle nodded and waited as Alexis tossed Scarlett into her. When Scarlett was within reach, Michelle scooped her up into position for basic Body Slam. Holding her hated foe inverted, Michelle positioned Scarlett’s head down and between her legs before sitting out, drilling the blonde’s skull into the canvas the Trachtenberg Special, her primary means of finishing her opponents. Normally, Michelle would have scooted forward and sat on the blonde’s upturned face, but she pulled away and motioned for the other brunettes to pile onto Scarlett and make this thing official. Lacey and Alexis wasted no time in joining Michelle for the cover and the ref began his count, but at the absolute last possible moment Scarlett draped her leg over the bottom rope, forcing the ref to break the count.

Exasperated at her old foe’s tenacity, Michelle took control of the situation and after pulling Scarlett’s limp form upright, she tossed the blonde to Lacey with, “Here, you hold her; Alexis and I’ll rip her head off!”

Lacey slipped behind the semiconscious blonde, hooking both arms tight behind her. Once they had their target secured, Alexis and Michelle backed up a few steps and stood beside each other.

Nodding to the other brunette, Michelle set for the Super Kick and asked, “Ready?” Alexis merely nodded. “Let’s get it done then,” Michelle whispered.

Both brunettes tensed then and took a half step backwards before hopping forward to send their kicking leg rocketing towards Scarlett’s jaw. Through the haze clouding her thoughts, Scarlett saw what was coming and knew she had to act. Right as Alexis and Michelle stepped back, the blonde fired a foot up and back, her heel smashing directly between Lacey’s legs. The unsuspecting brunette almost crumpled right then, but Scarlett held her up just long enough for the kicks to start and then she ducked aside, leaving Alexis and Michelle to kick their partner in the face. Lacey went down like a ton of bricks and before the others could even grasp what they’d done, Scarlett doled out two more shots below the belt, dropping them to their knees. Moving faster than anyone thought she could at this point; Scarlett grabbed a handful of hair in each hand and hauled Alexis and Michelle to their feet. In the same instant she ran towards the edge of the ring and tossed them through the middle ropes, leaving them to crash to the floor below.

Whirling around, Scarlett saw Lacey trying to get to her feet and decide to help her out. Striding over to the brunette, Scarlett went behind her and yanked her up. Before Lacey knew what was going on, Scarlett had locked in the Cobra Clutch and was in motion, running across the ring in huge, lunging strides. Rapidly running out of room, Scarlett left her feet and sailed through the air, coming down on her butt while Lacey came down on her face. Savoring the spasm that wracked Lacey’s form, Scarlett released the Clutch and shoved her victim onto her back. Knowing it was probably an indulgence she couldn’t afford, Scarlett went for it anyway, planting her butt right on Lacey’s face, pinning her with a Reverse Face Sit while she reached forward and hooked both legs. Pining the limbs under her armpits, Scarlett leaned back as far as she could, listening with savage delight as the Ref counted, “1... 2... 3!”

Tossing Lacey’s legs aside with disdain, Scarlett arrogantly adjusted her trunks while still seated on Lacey’s upturned face, then snapping her waistband with her thumbs, the exhausted blonde purred, “And then there were three.” Getting up, she dismissed Lacey as the official tended to getting the beaten girl out of the ring. Fixing her smirk on the brunettes recovering on the floor, Scarlett put her hands on her hips, immensely enjoying the furious look on their faces when they realized Lacey had been eliminated. Feeling rejuvenated, Scarlett teased, “What’s the matter sluts? Did your little plan backfire? If three of you idiots couldn’t put me away, what chance do two of you have?”

Michelle and Alexis looked at each other and then slid under the bottom rope, getting to their feet in the same motion. Incensed at Scarlett’s taunts, Michelle shot forward with claws extended only to be sent hard to the mat when Scarlett tripped her up with a Drop Toe Hold. Popping to her feet, Scarlett met Alexis with fists up, slugging away with the blue-eyed beauty as they hammered each other around the ring without mercy. After an especially hard jab rocked Alexis back on her heels, Scarlett slipped behind her and slapped on the Half Nelson before pulling Alexis’ left arm across her own throat, locking on the Cobra Clutch once more. Pulling up with all her remaining strength, Scarlett marched towards the center of the ring, making sure Alexis was well away from the ropes. The blonde was about to hit the 'Red Sky at Morning' for a second time when a clubbing blow across the back of her head caused her to release her hold with a groan - only to be bent backward with her chin wedged into Michelle’s armpit.

Keeping Scarlett bent backwards, Michelle grabbed a handful of tights and sneered, “You think you’re clever Red? You may have beaten Lacey, but I’ll break every bone in my body before I let you win this match.” Receiving no answer, Michelle fell backwards, spiking the back of Scarlett’s head into the mat with the Inverted DDT. She knew Scarlett was running on empty and she went for the cover. Now that the match was a Triple Threat again, she felt no qualms about trying to pin Scarlett alone. The blonde on the other hand felt no qualms about kicking free, which she did right after “TWO!” Getting to her knees, Michelle let out a frustrated sigh. Seeing that Alexis was collecting herself, Michelle called out, “Alexis come help me with this.”

Hearing Michelle’s voice, Alexis worked out the pain in her neck and got to her feet. Limping over to where Michelle was hauling Scarlett up, each brunette grabbed a hold of a wrist and whipped the decimated blonde into the ropes. As Scarlett lurched back towards them, the brunettes ducked low, setting for the Back Drop that would send Scarlett sailing into the lights. But instead of playing the victim, Scarlett went on the attack. Putting on the brakes right before she reached her rivals, Scarlett wrapped an arm across the back of each of their necks and fell backwards, driving Alexis and Michelle into the mat with Double DDT. Rising to her feet, Scarlett stood over the two injured girls and tried to decide on a course of action. Her gaze flicked back and forth between Michelle and Alexis before finally coming to rest on her archenemy. Bending over, she pulled Michelle to her feet and trapped her in a Standing Headscissors.

Grabbing a handful of teal briefs, Scarlett hissed, “You’re the one I want most Michelle; the other two are just a bonus.”

She pulled up viciously, giving the auburn haired girl a sadistic wedgie. Riding out Michelle’s minor thrashing, Scarlett sawed the distended garment back and forth a few more times before releasing her grip and wrapping both arms around Michelle’s damp waist. Pulling up, she inverted her prey and held her aloft for a few seconds before falling back, driving the crown of the brunette’s skull into the mat with a Pile-Driver. Knowing Alexis was still incapacitated, Scarlett hoped she could finish Michelle off right now, hooking a leg as she went for the cover. Sadly this was not to be as Michelle managed to free herself from Scarlett’s clutches right at “TWO!” Reaching the end of her patience, Scarlett pulled Michelle up and trapped her in the Standing Headscissors again.

Wrapping her arms around Michelle’s waist, Scarlett demanded, “Just stay down Michelle. You know damn well that I can and will do a lot worse to ya if you keep getting up.”

“Funny, I use the exact same threat too!” came a voice from in front of her.

Scarlett looked up just in time to see the heel of the boot crash into her face, the solitary Super Kick connecting where the tandem one had failed. Scarlett was knocked for a loop, landing on her back in a pained sprawl right next to the recovering Michelle. Regaining her balance, Alexis took a deep breath and ran a hand threw her hair. Taking a moment to salute the crowd, she whispered to herself, “Man that was satisfying.” Slowly circling both her foes (now that Lacey was gone, Michelle was definitely on the enemy list) Alexis wanted to take Scarlett out as badly as Michelle did. After all, the blonde had insulted them all brazenly at the end of her match with Piper Perabo.

Seeing that Scarlett would get up first, Alexis stepped in and dropped to one knee. Pointing her arm at Scarlett, she silently begged the blonde to turn around so she could nail the 'Last Word' a second time. As if her thought was a talisman, Scarlett turned to face Alexis and the brunette pounced. She wrapped her arm around Scarlett’s neck but before she could fall to complete the move, the blonde got her hands against the small of Alexis’ back and shoved as hard as she could. Alexis was thrown off balance and stumbled forward several steps, her awkward lurch culminating in a head on collision with Michelle. The brunettes grunted when they went down, and for several seconds, there was nothing but muttered curses and insults as they tried to disengage from one another.

Finally, they pulled free of one another and got to their feet and with their tempers finally getting the better of them, Michelle and Alexis went nose to nose.

“Watch where you’re going.” Michelle hissed.

“Maybe if you weren’t laid out on the mat, I wouldn’t have to worry about tripping over your ass!” Alexis countered.

Michelle bristled at the implication and stepped closer. “You want to see if you can put me back on the mat?” she threatened.

Alexis seemed on the verge of a response when her gaze shifted focus. Following her rival’s eyes, Michelle saw Scarlett leaning arrogantly against the ropes, watching their confrontation with feigned disinterest.

Realizing she’d been caught, Scarlett cooed, “ Oh don’t mind me ladies. I love watching amateurs settle their differences.”

That was probably the wrong thing to say because Alexis and Michelle forgot each other for another moment and charged at Scarlett, nailing the started blonde across the chest with another tandem Clothesline that sent her spilling to the floor below.

Watching the blonde writhe on the thinly padded concrete, Michelle told Alexis, “Go get her!”

But Alexis had had enough of following Michelle’s orders. Shoving the auburn haired girl she said, “You want her, YOU get her. Personally I don’t care about the order in which I eliminate you.”

Michelle took umbrage with the tone of Alexis’ voice. Dropping into a crouch she extended her claws and replied, “Alright babe, you wanna go, let’s go. I seem to remember promising to present you with a ‘Trachtenberg Special’ and I sure as hell won’t mind sitting on that cute little nose of yours.”

Alexis hated the thought of suffering a Facesit from Michelle. Her lip curling back in a feral sneer she shot back, “I’m gonna love making you tap out Michelle. Absolutely LOVE it.”

Michelle only beckoned the other brunette in and Alexis obliged her lunging in to lock up with Michelle in a Collar and Elbow Tie-up. The two lithe brunettes pushed and shoved against one another for several seconds before Michelle managed to grab hold of Alexis’ wrist and whip hard toward what she thought was the ropes. Tragically, while the ropes occupied the direction she chose, the referee also occupied it and Alexis was sent full force into the hapless official, knocking him senseless in a single shot. Cursing the luck, Michelle hoped that Rich would have a replacement ref out fast enough to make this next count.

Standing over Alexis, Michelle yanked the brunette to her scooped her up for the Trachtenberg Special. With Alexis’ head hanging precariously between her thighs, Michelle took a step back to make sure she was in the center of the ring. The auburn haired girl was less than a second from sitting out when the chair rammed into her back. Michelle screamed in agony and fell forward dropping Alexis to the canvas as she did so. Surveying her handiwork, Scarlett brought the chair up again and gave it a quick kiss. Sauntering around her downed opposition, she kicked Michelle off of Alexis and looked down at the brunette.

Raising the chair over her head, Scarlett teased, “Sorry if you felt left out Alexis. Here’s one for you too.” She brought the chair whistling down, smashing the cold steel against Alexis’ exposed torso. Alexis cried out and gasped like a speared fish, but there was no one to stop this heinous assault, as the ref was still deep in the land of Nod. Smirking in triumph, Scarlett raised the chair in one hand and called to the audience, “None of you are ever going to forget what Scarlett Johansson did tonight.”

She was about to continue when a voice growled from behind her, “You got that right!”

Scarlett whirled around only to be greeted with a hard knee right between her thighs, the blonde gasped and dropped the chair. Trying to shake off the pain, she looked up and her eyes widened as she found herself staring into the furious face of Lacey Chabert! Not giving Scarlett any more time to comprehend, Lacey stepped forward and cinched Scarlett up for the 'IFR' once more; her right arm slipped over Scarlett’s left shoulder while her left arm was threaded under Scarlett’s right shoulder. Locking her grip, Lacey didn’t even bother with a threat, she simply drove herself back and down, taking special care to make sure that Scarlett’s face slammed into the chair the blonde had used as a weapon just moment before. Getting to her feet, Lacey snapped her trunks back into place and looked around. She had intended to simply come out, flatten Scarlett and watch her get eliminated, but as she stared at Michelle and Alexis, her rage flowed towards them as well. If it weren’t for these two idiots, she’d probably still be in the match.

Under her breath she whispered, “You’re as much to blame as she is.”

Striding over to the downed brunettes, Lacey pulled both of them to their feet, making sure she was standing between them. She waited just long enough for surprise to creep into their faces before she delivered two rapid-fire knee lifts, each hitting deep below the belt. Michelle and Alexis tried to fall back, but Lacey would have none of it. She caught them before they could fall and jerked the close, slipping an arm around each of their shoulders before gripping them tightly by the back of the neck. Relishing her vengeance, Lacey spat, “Remember, this is what incompetence gets you.” Then she fell back, driving each of her captives face first into the mat with an ingenious double application of the 'IFR.'

Popping to her feet, Lacey saw that the ref was still down and no one was coming to relieve him. Planning what she wanted to do, she looked around at the carnage she had wrought and decided she needed to go out on a high note. Stalking over to Scarlett, Lacey grabbed the folded chair and shoved it under the strawberry blonde’s back, so she was lying parallel on it. Fixing her attention back on the brunettes, Lacey scooped up Alexis and marched her over to Scarlett before Body Slamming her on top of the blonde, making sure she was laying on Scarlett with her head just to the right of the blonde’s. Almost done, Lacey went over to Michelle and repeated the process, slamming her down on the other two, leaving them all stacked on top of each other in the same position. Leaving her pile of victims, Lacey climbed to the top rope and perched ominously.

Looking out at the redlining mob, she roared, “I might not have won this fight, but I know DAMN well that when people think back to this match, THIS is what they’ll remember. That’s not a bad way to start a legacy.”

As the crowd jumped to their feet, Lacey leapt off the turnbuckles, soaring gracefully through the air before dropping the full force of her weight butt first down across Michelle’s chest with her devastating A-Bomb finisher. The crowd chanted ‘HOLY SHIT!’ as Lacey recovered and peeled the two brunettes off the blonde at the bottom of the pile. Pulling the chair out from under Scarlett, Lacey tossed it out of the ring and turned back to her fallen rivals. Grabbing hold of Michelle, Lacey dragged the unresponsive brunette over to Scarlett and draped one arm over the blonde’s slowly rising chest before repeating the tactic with Alexis. Her work almost done, Lacey went to the Ref and tugged him over to the other girls. Standing over the felled zebra, Lacey nudged him with her boot several times before he started to come around. Shaking off his nausea, the official saw the cover and slowly raised his hand.

Lacey saw the count start and as she slipped out of the ring, she whispered, “Enjoy your money, losers.”

The ref seemed to be making his count underwater, but that did not stymie the exuberance of the crowd or the inevitability of his falling arm. With agonizing slowness, he counted, “1.…… 2.….. 3!”

The bell rang a second time, signaling Scarlett’s elimination. As the ref moved gingerly to get the blonde out of the squared circle, the two remaining combatants didn’t look like they’d even be able to continue the fight. After Scarlett’s chair shots and Lacey’s assault, Michelle and Alexis were damn near running on fumes. Finishing up with Scarlett, the ref turned and saw the decimated condition of both girls and went to start his ten count. He’d made it all the way to eight, and the fans in the arena groaned at the thought of the match ending by count out, but both brunettes managed to roll onto their sides and get to their knees right before the final count was issued. Shaking off the combined effects of Lacey and Scarlett’s attacks, Michelle and Alexis got wearily to their feet, standing unsteadily as they surveyed the damage that had been done to themselves. Convinced that they could continue, the two brunette’s locked eyes and settled into painfully wary crouches.

Circling her rival, Michelle beckoned her fingers and said, “Time to finish this Alexis; time you learn who’s best.”

Alexis didn’t bother with a verbal response, choosing instead to surge forward and lock up with her nemesis. Pushing and shoving against Michelle’s shoulders, Alexis went low and scooped Michelle up, holding her perpendicular across her chest. With a grim smile on her face, Alexis rose up on her toes and then dropped to one knee, smashing the small of Michelle’s back across the posted joint. Tossing Michelle to the canvas in a sweating tangle of limbs, Alexis pushed her prey onto her stomach before getting to her feet. Standing on Michelle’s back, Alexis leapt into the air and tucked her knees under her, coming down hard on Michelle’s abused spine. Michelle screamed wordlessly as her back was destroyed, the auburn haired girl almost helpless as Alexis muscled her into a seated position. Snaking her arms under Michelle’s, Alexis clamped on a Full Nelson and took a second to catch her breath.

Exhaling wetly into Michelle’s ear, Alexis panted, “Now we find out who’s better Michelle.”

Then she turned her foe over, sitting roughly on Michelle’s back and pulling for all she was worth, adding to the agony of the Nelson by adding a Camel Clutch to the maneuver. Stretched to the limit, Michelle shook her head in wild refusal as the Ref asked her for surrender. Blinking sweat and tears from her eyes, the brunette saw that salvation lay only a few feet away, in the form of the ropes. Biting her tongue to keep from screaming, Michelle pulled herself forward as best she could, dragging the determined bulk of Alexis along for the ride.

After several excruciating seconds, Michelle drew within reach and snagged the rope, shaking it madly to demand release of the hold. Frustrated, Alexis released the hold, but she wasn’t about to give Michelle a breather. Getting off Michelle’s back, Alexis grabbed hold of her ankles and slowly pulled her back toward the center of the ring. Taking several seconds to get her breath back, Alexis limped over to Michelle’s head and pulled the other brunette to her feet. Standing face to face with her equally strong willed adversary, Alexis bent and grabbed hold of Michelle’s right leg, behind the knee. Pulling the captive limb up, Alexis held Michelle prone in front of her.

Dark blue eyes flashing, Alexis said, “This match is mine to win Michelle. And I’m going to win it. Not because I’m the prettiest, the flashiest or the most gimmicky. But because I’m the best WRESTLER in this ring.”

Before Michelle could voice a reply, Alexis fell to the mat, twisting Michelle’s leg as she went. The Dragon Screw Leg Whip worked to perfection and Michelle bore its wrath, her long limb wrenched painfully as she was pulled to the mat with her attacker. Lying on the canvas. Alexis should have let go of her prize, but instead she maintained her grip. Rolling to her knee, she stood up, pulling Michelle up in the process. With Michelle still hopping before her, Alexis repeated the maneuver, adding more torque to her fall this time. Michelle screeched plaintively as she was tossed to the mat again, her knee feeling like it was on the verge of separating. She was blinking back tears and choking back her submission when Alexis pulled her to her feet a third time.

Holding her mewling prey, Alexis asked, “Are you ready to surrender?”

The question seemed to light a fire inside Michelle and the lithe brunette’s eyes suddenly cleared. Fixing a steady stare on Alexis, she spat, “Never.”

Alexis sighed and was about to hit the third Dragon Screw when Michelle leapt into the air and smashed her free foot into the side of Alexis’ head in a surprise Enziguiri. Alexis was caught flat-footed by the strike and her eyes went wide with shock as she released her grip and toppled over face down on the mat clutching at her injured head.

Getting slowly to her feet, Michelle put some weight on her injured leg, distressed at the heavy twinge of pain that roared through the limb as she did so. Limping over to Alexis, Michelle bent and pulled the injured girl to her knees. Not bothering with any formalities, Michelle stepped forward and wedged her victim’s head between her thighs, clamping on the Standing Headscissors. Feeling a bit vindictive, Michelle grabbed hold of Alexis’ midnight blue trunks and yanked up hard, administering a wedgie. With her free hand, she spanked Alexis’ backside briskly, only stopping when she felt the other brunette begin to struggle.

Wrapping both arms around her victim’s waist, Michelle said quietly, “Sorry to shatter your hopes Alexis, but you’re currently getting spanked by the best wrestler in this ring.”

Simultaneous with her last word, she hauled Alexis into the air, holding the limber brunette in the Powerbomb position. Waiting just a second, Michelle slammed Alexis down full force, listening in cold rapture as the other girl crashed into the mat with a wet thud. Too tired to go for anything else at the moment, Michelle simply fell forward and lay across her foe, hoping her improvised cover would suffice. Unfortunately, it didn’t suffice and Alexis was able to kick out right before the ‘THREE!’ Getting her feet under her, Michelle pulled Alexis to hers and stood facing the wobbly-legged girl.

Staring deep into Alexis’ pain glazed face she said, “Let’s take it to the air then.”

She punctuated this phrase by leaping into the air and wrapping her legs around Alexis’ head. With a smooth twist of her hips, Michelle completed the Hurricanrana, staying seated on her captive as they landed, the makeshift Schoolgirl pin holding Alexis firmly to the canvas. The ref was in place and made his count quickly, but Alexis was still able to beat the count. Getting frustrated with the situation, Michelle pulled Alexis to the center of the ring and kicked her onto her belly. Standing on the downed brunette’s thighs, facing her head, Michelle said plainly, “Time to twist her.”

Reaching down, she pulled Alexis’ calves upward before tucking them inside her own. With Alexis’ legs secure, Michelle reached forward and grabbed hold of both her victim‘s wrists. Cinching in her grip, Michelle leaned back and sat down, pulling Alexis off her belly and onto her knees, a sadistic version of the Mexican Surfboard. But Michelle hadn’t locked in the 'Trachtenberg Twist' just yet, there was one crucial step still needed. To complete the hold, she released Alexis’ wrists and clamped her claws onto the brunette’s chest, tearing and kneading at her modest chest with reckless abandon.

Shaking her head frantically ‘no’ Alexis fought submission by thinking of how to escape. Centering her thoughts, she got her hands up onto Michelle’s hands and grabbed the other brunette’s thumbs. Not thinking, Alexis yanked back hard, nearly dislocating Michelle’s thumbs in the process. Michelle cried out and released her hold, scrambling away to nurse her injured digits. Snarling in fury as the dull fire raced through her hands, Michelle fought off the pain and stalked back towards Alexis. Sitting down next to her opponent, Michelle threaded her thighs around Alexis’ neck and locked her ankles, applying a perfect Headscissors.

Planting her hands on the canvas, Michelle rose up and bounced repeatedly, adding more pressure to the already debilitating hold. Throwing her head back, Michelle let out a primal roar of triumph, totally confidant that Alexis was going to tap. But instead of a submission, she was greeted by the ref’s droning voice telling her to break the hold before he reached five. Shocked, Michelle looked at her foe and gaped when she saw that Alexis had pulled herself to the ropes. Incredulous as well as furious, Michelle drove hard punches into Alexis’ back and screamed, “GIVE UP GODDAMMIT JUST GIVE UP!”

Hearing the ref reach four, Michelle released the hold in a burst of disgust and peeled herself off the other brunette, getting wearily to her feet as she tried to figure out what to do next. Knowing that she could offer Alexis no quarter, Michelle stooped over to pick her rival up and was greeted with a rake of her face for her efforts. Cursing and stumbling, Michelle backpedaled away only to be caught by the recovering Alexis. Trapping the taller girl in a Front Face Lock, Alexis threaded Michelle’s free arm over her shoulder and grabbed a handful of teal tights with her free hand. Pulling the trunks up in a brutal Half Wedgie (Alexis was more than willing to dish out this indignity of a reprisal) Alexis hauled Michelle off her feet and then fell forward, driving her face and chest into the canvas from a height of several feet up, a dastardly Inverted Suplex. Getting to her feet with none of her usual quickness, Alexis kicked Michelle onto her belly and stood by her feet.

Brushing a hand through her matted ebony mane, Alexis threatened, “You wanna twist me Michelle? Lemme show you how a pro does it.”

Bending down, se grabbed her nemesis’ ankles and folded Michelle’s legs up, pressing them roughly into the wounded girl‘s backside. Placing a knee on Michelle’s crossed ankles, Alexis lay down on her victim’s back and proceeded to lace her arms around Michelle’s head and left arm. Almost done, Alexis locks her hands right across her captive’s mouth and nose in a painful cross-face. Leaning back as much as physics would allow, Alexis pulled Michelle’s torso up off the mat, bending her prey’s neck and back at a hideous angle. The vicious STF variant that Alexis called 'Crystal Blue Persuasion' had just been locked in and it was locked on in the middle of the ring.

Focusing all her remaining strength, Alexis pulled sadistically, intent on forcing Michelle to concede. Mad with pain, Michelle realized that she only had a matter of seconds before she would pass out from the pain of the hold. Denouncing the thought of losing the match this way, she managed to twist her head just enough to open her mouth. Seizing this opportunity, Michelle surged forward and bit down, chewing manically on Alexis’ hand. Alexis cried out in rage and hurt but she didn’t immediately release the hold. It took several more seconds of chewing on Michelle’s part to force Alexis to release her torturous finisher and leave Michelle in peace of only for a few seconds. Shaking off the pain in her gnawed hand, Alexis yanked Michelle to her feet and slapped her hard across the face.

Standing face to face with the auburn haired beauty, Alexis hissed, “You wanna bite me? Go right ahead, but be aware that I’m gonna knock your teeth outta your stinking mouth.”

Booting Michelle in the gut, Alexis trapped her in a Standing Headscissors, then lifted Michelle into the air, holding her in position for either a Canadian Backbreaker or the equally nasty Holmes Wrecker. But instead of applying either of those moves, Alexis had something else in mind. Holding Michelle in place across her shoulder, Alexis wriggled her foe into place, tucking Michelle’s legs around Alexis’ hips. From there, Alexis shifted her grip on Michelle’s upper half, hooking both of her arms behind her rival’s arms. Hold finally secure, Alexis bounced a little bit, demonstrating Michelle’s utter helplessness in the grip of the Gory Guerrero Special.

Looking to make good on her promise to loosen a few of Michelle’s teeth, Alexis suddenly released her grip on Michelle’s upper half and grabbed her legs as the brunette began to fall towards the mat. As Michelle descended behind her, Alexis sat out, adding her momentum to the fall that drove Michelle’s face into the mat, a sort of sadistically ingenious Inverted Powerbomb. Ignoring the cheers of the fans for now, Alexis muscled Michelle onto her back and hooked both legs. She was about to roar her victory when Michelle got a shoulder up.

Face going cold with disbelief, Alexis rolled to one knee and extended her right arm, the universal sign for the ‘Last Word.’ Biding her time, Alexis waited until Michelle got to her feet and turned to face her before leaping off her feet. Alexis got her arm around Michelle’s neck and pulled down, driving Michelle’s face into the mat one more time. Feeling the slender brunette go limp in her grip, Alexis straddled Michelle’s waist, putting one hand on her foe’s forehead while the other was extended over her, counting off the final seconds of the match. “1... 2... Thr…NO!”

Michelle got a shoulder off the mat so late that there was less than half an inch between the Ref’s hand and the canvas. When Michelle kicked out this time. Alexis couldn’t believe it. This girl had kicked out of the 'Last Word' and escaped from 'Crystal Blue Persuasion.' This was NOT supposed to be possible! Getting to her feet, she surveyed the ring, looking to answer the question of what would finally put Michelle down for good. Her blue eyes widened slightly and she smiled as her gaze fell on the corner.

Speaking more to herself than her battered opposition, she said, “Let’s see you kick out of one off the top.”

Hastening to end this war of attrition, Alexis muscled Michelle to her feet and tossed her into the corner. Wrapping her arms around Michelle’s damp waist, Alexis lifted her up, seating her roughly on the top buckle. Climbing to the middle rope, Alexis wrapped her arm around Michelle’s neck and was about to leap when the auburn haired girl pounded a punch into her face. Stunned, Alexis shook off the blow and tried to clamp her grip on once more, but Michelle was thrashing wildly all the sudden, bucking and punching in a desperate attempt to free herself from this potentially crippling predicament. Finally one of her Haymakers loosened Alexis’ grip and Michelle brought both of her hands up, burying them in Alexis’ damp mane. Keeping Alexis in her grasp, Michelle turned her prey around to face her as quickly as she could.

Catching Alexis’ pained stare for a second, Michelle whispered, “This is MY NIGHT.”

She bent and scooped Alexis up, holding her in position for a Body Slam. Standing up slowly, Michelle managed to back up one more step so that she was standing on the top turnbuckles. Positioning Alexis’ head between her thighs, Michelle took a deep breath and leapt into the air, smashing Alexis’ head into the mat with a 'Trachtenberg Special' administered from the top rope. Feeling, rather than seeing the move connect, Michelle scooted forward and sat on Alexis’ uncomprehending face, not even bothering to grind her hips as the ref and the mob counted simultaneously, “ONE...TWO... THREE!”

The mob roared its approval as the ref called for the bell. Hearing the final clang, Michelle got her feet under her and managed to stand just long enough for the official to raise her hand in victory, then the exhausted brunette stumbled forward, collapsing to her knees as the toll of war began to set in. Getting up from his seat, Rich grabbed a mic in one hand and the trophy in another before climbing the steel steps and getting into the ring. Approaching the kneeling brunette, he set the trophy down and then helped Michelle get to her feet. Nodding his congrats to her, she silently mouthed, “hold on just a second” before bringing the mic up.


There was another wild bust of applause and Michelle couldn’t help the grin and the tears as she nodded thanks to everyone in attendance. Giving her a moment, Rich reached into his pocket and pulled out a thick wad of bills. Turning to the victorious girl once more, he spoke again.

“Michelle, first off congrats are an order. You put up one hell of a fight tonight and went through some great girls to win. So for that, congratulations. You’ve earned it.” He handed her the roll of bills. “Here’s the ten grand for helping to eliminate Scarlett!” He reached into his jacket and pulled out a check. “And here’s the hundred grand you get for winning.” Michelle palmed the bills, but folded the check and slipped in under the strap of her top, smiling mischievously as she did so. While that was going on, Rich bent down and picked up the trophy again and holding it out to her said, “And here’s the trophy and the match that comes with it. Now before we fade to black, do you have anything you wanna say, either about this match or the match you’re going to make?”

He handed her the microphone. Holding the trophy in one hand, Michelle hoisted it over her head and voiced a triumphant cry that was returned by the multitudes. Finally putting her prize down, she straightened up.

“Thank you; all of you. I went through hell to get this trophy, but having all of you here cheering makes the bruises and aches worth it. I beat three amazing talents tonight. Alexis, you hit me with everything you had and took everything I could throw back. Any time you want a rematch, say the word and you’re on. Scarlett… Scarlett what can I say to you that I haven’t already said? How about, the bonus is nice but beating your arrogant ass in front of a capacity crowd was something I’d have done for free. Next time keep your nose out of business that doesn’t concern you or I might just grind it off your face.”

The crowd went wild as Michelle grinned and wiggled her hips ever so slightly. She posed for the audience for a few more seconds before she resumed, this time with a more serious expression on her face. “And that brings me to Lacey. Listen up ditz; I know damn well what you tried to do tonight and I’m willing to bet your whiny ass wants another shot at greatness. Well here's the deal klutz. I don’t take kindly to being used to make someone else famous, so if you want me one on one, come and get me. I’m not wasting my match on somebody like you, but I have a feeling Rich will be more than willing to draw up the contract somewhere down the line. And when it’s just you and me in here… little girl I’m gonna make you famous all right. You’re gonna be the bitch who had her nose broken by MY ass, then begged for mercy in the middle of the ring. And to anyone else who doesn’t yet comprehend how good I am; just keep watching. My time is now, and very soon I will have gold around my waist. One way or another.” She handed the mic back to Rich then and made one more circuit of the ring before picking up the trophy and exiting up the ramp. She slapped hands with the fans for a good two minutes before finally breezing through the curtain for a much needed post match rest and recuperation.

Left alone in the ring, Fannin looked out at the crowd and said, “Well folks that’s our show tonight, hope you enjoyed it and hope you’ll tune in next week. And just in case you needed an incentive to check it out, our main event next week will be a brand new gimmick, the likes of which you’ve never seen. Pandora’s Box is coming ladies and gentlemen, Beware.” Then he nodded to the fans and exited the ring, leaving the faithful with the memories of what they’d just seen and the anticipation of what was waiting around the next corner!


Mr. Skin