Showdown at the KO Corral (Sarah Carter vs. Lacey Chabert) by Archer

Last February your humble scribe had the idea of two then unmanaged fighters, Sarah Carter and Lacey Chabert who met one day and discovered they shared a taste for "role play" or fantasy boxing. The boxing would be real but Lacey and Sarah play roles (they are, after all, actresses as well as boxers). Their first production:, “THE BATTLE OF THE NILE” starred Lacey as Queen Cleopatra fighting her Roman challenger, Charlize Theronicus, (Sarah) on a barge in the Nile (actually the top deck of a houseboat moored in a secluded cove).. I had always intended to write more of their adventures, but things happened, Lacey's been signed by Samdog’s stable and, quite recently Sarah has landed a sparring gig with The Mountees stable.

Then I had an idea for a new fight scenario for them. So I am posting this story which can be considered to have happened sometime last summer. These fights are written to reflect what the girls imagine the fights to be (the cheering, but actually non-existent crowd). It is sort of like the "blue screen" acting in movies with lots of SFX--the actor must imagine themselves in a scene with someone or something that will be added her computer. The girls do have props like the houseboat that became Cleopatra's fabled barge. In this case, an Old West movie ranch that also did a stint as one of those "Old West Ghost Town" amusement parks. One set is an old saloon complete with breakaway table and chairs. Behind it is a corral that will be the setting of the fight. The place is closed, but the owner, a retired film director called Zeke has agreed to let them use it if he can watch. He also plays Zack the bartender in the scene that follows an old “Sheriff Longarm” who will referee the actual fight.

In the scene that follows Lacey and Sarah have been so pleased with the saloon set that they decide to do a scene together (in rented costumes) that will act as the set up for the fight. Note that their fights are not scripted out except in a general way, (i.e., "Miss Sarah enters and gets into with Miss Lacey. Miss Lacey gets the better of her--this time.")
Part 1: The Set-Up

It was another hot summer morning in the frontier town of Sagebrush Corners. The Rawhide saloon was actually quiet this time of day. Miss Sarah, the new schoolteacher from the East, decided this would be the day to swallow her pride and go see the owner of the Rawhide Saloon, Miss Lacey. She cautiously entered the notorious establishment that the good people of Sagebrush Cortners wanted to see closed, but because it was located just outside of town, it remained open and the reputed scene of wild drunken depravity most every night. The only one around was an old bartender carefully stacking glasses for tonight's debauchery. Miss Sarah marched up him and politely, but firmly asked to see the owner of the establishment, the young woman known as Miss Lacey.

"She thought you might be coming one of these days," the bartender replied looking amused as the primly dressed and bonneted young woman. "I'll see if she's up yet, she don't get to bed until late."

"I am not surprised," Miss Sarah said disapprovingly.

The bartender ignored this and disappeared up the stairs. Miss Sarah was left to realize how hot and sticky even the thin cotton dress she over her corset and chemise felt.

Then a mocking voice called out from the stairs: "How nice of you to call on me, Miss Sarah."

Miss Sarah looked and saw that it was the dark-haired she-devil herself. She was clad in a bright blue kimono, but she hadn't bothered to the tie the sash. As Miss Lacey sauntered down the steps and across the room to the young schoolteacher, the kimono kept parting to a reveal an expensive, but shockingly short chemise--her knees were actually visible. What was more, the brunettes uncorseted bosoms swung freely beneath the thin fabric. Miss Sarah found herself staring at this blatant site--something that made Miss Lacey smile wickedly.

"Oh dear," Miss Lacey said, "I seem to have shocked you. You will have to forgive me, but I've found it impossible to be comfortable in all those clothes you good ladies insist on wearing in this heat."

"I'm sure you're even more comfortable out of them!" The prim blonde schoolteacher blurted nastily, driven by a strange sense of competitiveness.

Miss Lacey smiled even more wickedly: "You should try it sometime. You know, Miss Sarah, I sometimes suspect you actually have a woman's body under all that cloth. A pity you are too prudish to let anyone see it. Tell me, do you change clothing in the dark?"

Miss Sarah's faced reddened: "I am not ashamed of my body. I just choose not to let the world gape and drool at it."

Miss Lacey smiled that wicked smile: "Assuming they would see something to make them gape and drool."

Miss Sarah's right hand itched to slap at the brunette's mocking face, but then she remembered why she had come here and swallowed her pride.

"I have come about the fund raising drive for the new schoolhouse. It appears that despite my best efforts, the funds raised will not be sufficient," Miss Sarah explained.

"So my patron Banker Smith was telling me. I take it you are now ready to accept my--what did you call it when I offered it months ago?--oh yes, 'the corrupt fruit of a depraved tree'."

"I-I-regret my colorful language, but I am here to plead for the children of the town who need a new school--" Miss Sara began, but Miss Lacey held up her hand.

"You need not repeat the sales pitch. I will give you all the money you need for the school and more--but YOU must do something for me in return."

"What?" Miss Sarah asked warily.

Miss Lacey smiled: "I know about those boxing lessons you give your older female students."

"I am merely teaching them how to defend themselves from some the drunken rowdies who sometimes stagger into town and accost them. I took extensive lessons in pugilism before I left the East," Miss Sarah retored.

Miss Lacey shrugged: "In any case, I thought you looked pretty good, but punching untrained girls is one thing. I want you to prove you can truly box. I want you to fight ME--in a boxing ring in front of whatever people are willing to pay two dollars to watch. The money would also go to the school fund."

Miss Sarah gasped: "I couldn't do such a thing--it is--depraved!"

"Possibly, but I would have the pleasure of punching your prissy face until it was face down in the dirt. We can use the corral out back. Oh, and don't worry, you and your school fund will get my money win or lose."

"There must be something more to it than that, what is it?" Miss Sarah asked suspiciously.

"I think it would be nice if you named the new schoolhouse after the man who founded this saloon--my uncle Silas. He was a good man--and, yes, he was really my uncle, no matter what the town gossips may have told you."

Miss Sarah was silent for some time, Then she asked: "What would we wearing when we fought?"

"Well, that is up to you. For myself, I think I will use one of the costumes my dancers wear. It is a one piece garment with some nice ruffles on it. Oh, and I'll wear these black stockings I have been saving. As for you, all I can say is forget about wearing a dress and corset. You might try a chemise and drawers--assuming you've got any that would look as good as mine."

Miss Sarah glared at the saloon owner: "You disgusting, immoral, debauched women all think the rest of us know nothing about being desired by a man! Just you wait and see what I come up with! It will be a pleasure to wear it as I destroy you!"

Miss Lacey just smiled that maddening wicked smile: "I'll believe that when I see it. Oh, I am neglecting my duties as a hostess. Would you care for a drink? Zack, pour me a shot of 'redeye' and I suppose sarsaparilla for Miss Sarah here."

"Anything you can drink--I can drink!" Miss Sarah snapped. "I'll have a shot of this 'redeye' drink, too!"

Zack dutifully poured two shot glasses of 'redeye' whiskey. The two young women took a glass and saluted each other and then gulped down the liquid. Miss Lacey watched with interest as Miss Sarah's face turned red and she nearly chocked, but the blonde gamely swallowed it down.

"Th-that wasn't so bad," Miss Sarah declared, a trifle unsteadily. "May I have another?"

Miss Lacey smiled and nodded at the bartender who poured two fresh shots. They swallowed them both down. Miss Sarah didn't choke so much this time and this seemed to please her. She asked for a third shot. Miss Lacey matched her once more. Miss Sarah didn't choke at all, but her cheeks were now flushed and her eyes were becoming too bright. Miss Lacey smiled knowingly at Zack.

"We had best stop now. Miss Sarah here, doesn't seem able to hold her liquor," the brunette said with a smirk.

"The hell I can't!" Miss Sarah blurted out in a slurred voice. "I can drink more than a damned whore like you!"

Miss Lacey scowled: "I don't care if you are drunk, schoolteacher, nobody calls me a whore and gets away with it!"

"You think you're some kind of expert about men just because you show yourself to any cowboy who waves a fifty-cent piece in your face--"

SLAPPPPPP!!!!!! Miss Lacey's hand cracked across Miss Sarah's right cheek sending her reeling against the bar.

Miss Sarah's sunbonnet fell off and her golden hair came undone, hanging down over her face. The schoolteacher brushed the hair out of her eyes and after a long pause--rocked the saloon owner with a powerful slap of her own! The two women then squared off in a furious exchange of head-turning slaps. Then, suddenly, Miss Sarah sank both hands into Miss Lacey's dark locks and Miss Lacey went after Miss Sarah's golden ones. The two them held on as they danced awkwardly around the barroom. Then they both lost their balances and fell over onto a table which collapsed with a loud crash!

Zack rushed out from behind the bar. He found his employer pinned beneath Miss Sarah, who seemed to have passed out and was now snorting heavily into the brunettes ear. Miss Lacey's chemise had been forced up nearly to her waist revealing her expensive red silk drawers that hung provocatively far above her knees. For a moment, Zack felt himself a much younger man, but then he snapped out of it and freed Miss lacey.

"Well, Miss Sarah, you can't hold your liquor--or your tongue," Miss Lacey muttered giving the sleeping woman a kick in the corseted ribs, "but, just like I suspected, you're a fighter and one I am going to enjoy demolishing front of the 'good' people of this town!"

"What'll I do with her?" Zack asked as Sarah curled up and continued to snore.

"Stick her in the back room until she's sobered up enough to make it home on her own. Oh, and tell her the fight will be a noon, two weeks from Saturday. That should give me enough time to have the stands built."

"You know, Miss Lacey, with the fight being right out back, we stand to make a mint in here," Zack observed.

"That we will, but I’m doing this to show up this town--and their little blonde heroine here!"

The town of Sagebrush Corners had never known such excitement as in those two weeks leading up to the boxing match between Miss Sarah and Miss Lacey. Temporary wooden stands had been constructed on either side of the corral out behind the Rawhide Saloon. In the course of the period it was agreed that Miss Lacey would make her approach to the ring from the rear entrance of her saloon, while Miss Lacey would emerge from an old barn at the opposite end of the corral that would be her changing room.

The event soon took on a holiday atmosphere. On the morning of the great contest, the town's brass band was on hand to play for the steadily growing crowd. The stands were all full even at the steep price of $2 per head and standing room areas (at $1) were soon filled as well.

It appeared virtually everyone in town was in attendance and more people had come by train from neighboring towns. There were even rumors that a special correspondent of the notorious POLICE GAZETTE was on hand to report on the fight for the nation's barber shops.

It must be admitted that most of the men in the crowd were not expecting much of a fight. Certainly, the Rawhide saloon regulars swore that Miss Lacey could deck just about any man among them if sufficiently provoked, some of Miss Sarah's boxing students stoutly upheld her pugilistic talents. However, for most of the males, all that was expected was some wild, inaccurate punching ending in a tearful surrender once one of them was actually hit hard.

Another subject of great interest to the males (and not a few of the females in attendance--and there were quite a few--saloon girls in support of Miss Lacey and 'good' women in support of their schoolteacher, Miss Sarah), this subject was just what the combatant planned to wear in the ring. It was widely rumored that the two women were determined to "out-do" each other in this regard and so the actual attire was as secret as their fight planning.

Then at 11:55 A.M., five minutes to noon, the band suddenly ceased its merry tooting. A silence of anticipation fell over the large and generally happy good natured crowd. (Though some Rawhide regulars were not pleased that the saloon would be closed until AFTER the fight, but Miss Lacey had been very firm about this and Sheriff Longarm had backed her up). Then a large dinner bell rang and the white-haired, grizzled figure of Sheriff Longarm strode firmly to the center of the corral.

"Ladies and gentlemen and visitors to our fair town of Sagebrush Corners, I am Sheriff Longarm and I welcome you to this special exhibition of boxing. Be it understood that this here fight will be fought without rounds. Thus the ladies will have at it until one of them goes down for a count of ten, gives up--or I say one of 'em's not fit to continue. Now that we have that out of the way, let us get to the business at hand: the introduction of our two Amazon fighters. The ladies have already flipped a coin to decide who will come out first and so let me now introduce: "THE CHAMPION OF THE RAWHIDE SALOON--MISS LACEY!"

The band struck up an exciting fanfare. The crowd, led by the barflies, cowboys and saloon girls cheered and whooped as Miss Lacey made a grand entrance from the rear of the saloon, She was wearing her favorite bright blue kimono robe, but as she struted slowly towards the corral, eager watchers could see the flash of her black silk stockinged legs and some even glimpsed the red garters holding them up. As she reached the center of the ring, Miss Lacey handed her robe off to an attendant and stood in the full glory of her fight costume, She had taken a sleeveless red with black ruffled trim dancer's costume (basically a leotard) which had been cut low to offer a tantalizing view of her proud, swelling bosom. In addition, the red garters (now plainly visible) and the elegant black stockings led down to a pair of ankle-high ladies' shoes.

Not a few of the "better" people of Sagebrush Corners murmured with dismay at the lustful outrageousness of the small brunette's attire. They were heard to pity poor Miss Sarah, who would surely never hope to match this eye-catching attire.


The band struck up another fanfare as Miss Sarah emerged from the barn wrapped in an emerald green robe. Though she had seen her rival, she seemed serenely unfazed as she made her own way to the center of the corral. Now face-to-face with her smugly smiling rival, Miss Sarah gave Miss Lacey an "I'll-show-you!" look and handed her robe to an attendant. Miss Lacey's jaw dropped and an audible gasp swept through the crowd.

Miss Sarah had raided her hope chest for her best white silk chemise. This garment was normally worn under a corset, but it cut so that it reached ONLY TO HER MID-THIGHS! From beneath peeked pink silk drawers-a garment that usually fell to the ankles, but now had been shortened so that it was even shorter than the chemise. (What would one day we called "boy-cut length"). The drawers now had a new trim of white lace. Miss Sarah wore pink silk stockings held up by dark pink garters and these were topped off by bright pink ankle-high shoes. If this were not all startling enough, the top of the chemise was cut low and Miss Sarah's bosoms were mysteriously thrust upward. Until this moment, no one in the crowd had realized their prim schoolmarm possessed such a sinfully attractive body. It was clear that surprise extended to Miss Lacey as well.

Still, Miss Lacey found her voice quickly enough, "Well, Miss Sarah, if you should ever give up teaching, I do believe I can find a place for you in my employ."

"How nice of you to make that offer," said Miss Sarah, smiling with great satisfaction as her voice dripped with sarcasm. "However, I have NO intention of EVER working for a DEPRAVED individual such as yourself. It is only my deep concern for the education of the young people of this community that has brought me here today. Let me tell you now: you will NEVER get the better of me in ANY WAY!"

Most of the townspeople cheered these bold words, but Miss Lacey scowled and snapped, "Let's get this thing started!"

"By all means," said Miss Sarah.

Sheriff Longarm inspected both sets of boxing gloves. (He also secretly admired the single "battle braid" each woman wore to control her long hair during the fight). He then went over the few simple rules and both women nodded their agreement. He then raised his arm and signalled to the man at the great dinner. The man quickly rang the bell and the great fight was on...

Miss Lacey and Miss Sarah went into their fighting crouches as the bell that signaled the start of the light was rung. Miss Sarah's stance seemed stiff and formally upright in comparison to Miss Lacey's crouching one. The first moments of the contest saw Miss Lacey probing at the blonde with long-distance punching. Miss Sarah seemed able to block or deflect these quite well. She also revealed a jab that she used to lick at the brunette's face whenever she came too close. These stinging blows seem to make Miss Lacey cautious after a few exchanges.

Then, Miss lacey suddenly seemed to have seen enough. Maintaining her crouch, she waded in towards Miss Sarah, slamming punches into the blonde's torso. Miss Sarah's guard went down to protect her body, but this left her open to a quick one-two combination to the face. Miss Sarah stumbled backwards and Miss lacey followed, trying to bring a quick end to the fight with a single knockout punch.

Fortunately for her, Miss Sarah was able to evade the brunette's wild knockout swings. Her defenses soon firmed and it was noted she seemed less stiff in her fighting stance. What was more the blonde was using her jab to redden Miss Lacey's creamy white face. Soon Miss Lacey was obliged to become more cautious again.

Although the fight had scarcely begun, eagle-eyed members of the crowd were noticing the noon sun was already making its blazing presence known. Both fighters were perspiring free and their clothes were starting to cling to sticky flesh in most interesting and revealing ways. Still, the intensity of the fighting remained strong.

It was now Miss Sarah's turn to go on the offensive. She began by slamming an unexpected shot into Miss Lacey's belly and followed this up with barrage of lefts and rights that had the brunette's head knocked from side to side. Miss Lacey began to retreat and Miss Lacey pursued across the length of the corral. Miss Sarah could see her opponent was in trouble and it excited her and she began to launch wild punches trying for her own KO.

Miss Sarah quickly learned this wildness was a mistake. Miss Lacey ducked under one of the attempted haymaker and drove a right uppercut into the underside of the schoolteacher's chin. Suddenly, Miss Sarah was the one in retreat as her opponent volleyed punch after punch at her. Sarah had no choice but to clinch to stop the attack and pull herself together until Sheriff Longarm forced her back. She was hurting; her face puffing up and a forlorn expression had crept onto her face.

Miss Lacey felt a swell of confidence and even grinned as she threw still more leather at the blonde, expecting to see her crumble into the dirt at any moment. It took several minutes for Miss Lacey to realize the blonde was NOT crumbling and worse, Miss Lacey could feel herself starting to pant. What was more, behind her now firm guard, Miss Sarah was looking more determined than ever.

Still, Miss Lacey was not out of ideas. She began to work a steady pattern of punches to Miss Sarah's ribs and stomach. As the brunette had hoped, Miss Sarah began to anticipate the punches and move to head them off. One more feint to the body and Miss Lacey slammed a right cross to the blonde's jaw. A spray of sweat flew off the schoolteacher's head as it was spun around by the punch. Miss Lacey then landed three solid punches to Miss Sarah's stomach. Miss Sarah groaned and folded to her knees in the dirt!

Sheriff Longarm jumped in and began the count as Miss Lacey confidently went to a neutral area. Miss Sarah made it up by 9 and declared she was ready to go on. This suited Miss Lacey just fine; she was now certain she’d soon either knock the blonde out or, even better, force her to quit in front of the whole town. But once again, Miss Sarah turned out to be far from finished!

As the brunette came at her, the blonde herself charged and as the two collided, the top of Miss Sarah's head caught Miss Lacey in the nose. Miss Lacey was dropped on her bottom and blood seeped from her nose. The crowd gasped and Ms. Lacey's supporters booed.

"What did I do?" Miss Sarah asked the sheriff. her eyes wide in innocence.

"You butted her with the top of your head, ma'am, please don't do that again or I shall have to disqualify you."

"My apologies, Miss Lacey," Miss Sarah said demurely, helping the brunette to her feet.

"Hypocrite!" Miss Lacey snarled under her breath and suddenly punched the blonde below the belt!

Miss Sarah staggered away in agony. The Sheriff sternly lectured Miss Lacey and the crowd booed fiercely.

"No more," the Sheriff concluded his lecture and Miss Lacey nodded, she seemed satisfied with the pained look on Miss Sarah's face.

"Are you both ready to resume fighting?" The Sheriff asked and both women now nodded. "All right, then begin!"

The pause in the action had caused both fighters to come down from the adrenal high of their earlier battles. Both were now sweat-drenched and panting. Pain wracked both bodies and fatique was gnawing at their performances. Yet this was balance by a grim determination in both: they had each expended too much effort to go down in defeat now!

Botgh women now snarled as they went for each in another explosive and costly exchange of close-in punching. Miss Lacey was maintaining a drumbeat attack on Miss Sarah's ribs, but Miss Sarah was scoring steadily against Miss Lacey's chin, rocking her again and again.

The crowd could only watch and cheer as they waited to see which fighter would crack first. Then they realized Miss Sarah was forcing Miss Lacey backwards as she tried to avoid those repeated shots to her swollen chin. At the same time, the brunette was still landing torso shots and Miss Sarah's ribs were on fire, but the blonde shut the pain out of her mind and she focused on Miss Lacey's slowly glazing eyes.

The battle had now reached one side of the corral and Miss Sarah suddenly realized the weakening Miss Lacey was standing with her back to a water filled horse trough. Miss Sarah summoned her remaining strength and drove an upper cut into that wrecked chin. In connected, the brunette's arms suddenly flopped to her sides.

POP! POP! POP! Miss Sarah drove three quick punches straight into Miss Lacey's face and the brunette toppled backwards like a felled tree landing perfectly within the water trough. The resulting splash drenched on-lookers, Miss Sarah and Sheriff Longarm alike. The Sheriff quickly pulled the soaked Miss Lacey out of the water while Miss Sarah tottered to the center of the corral where she raised her arms.

The crowd roared as Sheriff Longarm joined her to formally declare, "THE WINNER--BY A KNOCKOUT--MISS SARAH!" The crowd went wild, even the Miss Lacey fans, especially when Miss Sarah went over and hugged the waterlogged brunette.

"Great fight, saloon girl," Miss Sarah said.

"Great fight, schoolteacher," said Miss Lacey.

"Darn," Lacey said, holding a icepack to her nose, "I thought sure I was going to win this time."

"You almost did," Sarah said, adjusting the icepacks on her ribs. "Sorry about the head butt, I kind of got carried away."

"Well, I think I evened that with my groin shot," Lacey said.

Then Zack strolled into the room: "That was amazing ladies, but what story are you going to fight out next?"

Sarah and Lacey exchanged grins. Lacey then asked: "You ever here of a 'bridezilla'?"

"Can't say as I have. Some kind of monster?"

"Kind of," said Sarah, "it's a bride who gets so carried away trying to create the 'perfect' wedding that she becomes an uncontrolled monster to her friends and family."

"So?" Zack asked.

"Well," Lacey continued, "just suppose there were TWO such 'bridezillas' and they both were determined to have this one 'perfect' wedding chapel, but they've been double-booked into it."

"Oh, so they fight to see who gets the chapel," Zack said, "but won't they get their white gowns all torn and dirty?"

Sarah and Lacey gave him wicked smiles; "Oh, we won't be wearing the gowns--just what's UNDER them!"

"Oh boy!" Zack gasped happily.