(From Celebrity Ring Magazine, 5-8-09) by simguy
(I was leafing through my Celebrity Ring issue for this month and ran across "Short Time" an on-the-fly interview section with quotes from red-carpets, galas or clubs and restaurants. They aren't sit down, extended interviews; just off-the-cuff, in-passing, remarks. For those who don't subscribe here's a pertinent couple...)

CR: Nervous?

Stacy: About Ali? Not at all. You know - people used to tell me that I would never close the gap on her...Ali Landry was this next-level kind of talent at welterweight and that I should try to avoid her. Then I started beating her, and it's like 'you go, girl - get after that brunette!' So I'm not nervous at all - I'm really excited to be fighting her.

CR: What's with the crossbody, and can we expect to see Ali get stretched?

Stacy: (laughing) Oh God - the crossbody. You know, it's just something I've always done - it's nothing I plan for, really. It's a way of celebrating my length and beauty - getting on top of a girl and really wringing her out. As for Ali - I know I've got the green light from my management, but we'll just have to see. OH WHO AM I KIDDING??? If I punch her helpless, I won't be able to contain myself! Women like that always…always…bring out the minx in me, you know?

CR: You and Ali: knees allowed - thoughts?

Stacy: OMIGOD! I would DESTROY her! Can you imagine? Me working the clinch on Ali; pumping knees into her body and thighs? It would be sooo over. I would so win that one guys - and you can totally print that!

Ali, you're known as one of the sport's great intimidators on the scales...can you get to Stacy that way?

Ali: Stacy's a very confident young woman. I've broken a lot of women just by standing before them and making eye contact, but Keibler's always held up pretty well. I do love that, by the way: we're the hottest fight on the card, and we're definitely bringing in the marginal fan who might not care to see Natalie Portman's scrawny little body running around. When Stacy and I hook up, it's a real contest between two serious physiques.

CR: Sounds like you're ready to accept Stacy as an equal - maybe even a rival?

Ali: Rival? No. You've got to understand - as women of beauty - we're not on the same level. I've had my look measured and judged, by an international and institutionalized, multi-tiered system which has established that I'm one of the most beautiful women on Earth. Stacy's any hot blonde on any tropical beach, anywhere in the world. You take those bunnies and put them through the same rigorous evaluations I've undergone, and they just shred away.

CR: What about as a fighter...Stacy's much improved.

Ali: I won't deny that - Stacy's dangerous - probably more dangerous than Torrie Wilson at this point. Again, she's not as professional or consistent as I am - in fact, she's the most erratic fighter in the division - but with Stacy, erratic means sometimes brilliant. At her highest levels, she threatens me, and I have to be aware of her: the rest of the time, I'm always in control with her. I know what her limits are, and I know how to keep her within them.
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Stacy Keibler vs. Ali Landry Celebrity Boxing by simguy 5-15-09

Important positioning battle - neither girl wants to slip in a fast-improving welterweight division. "You can't see Theron through her entourage," Ali quips, referring to the famed big-girl phalanx surrounding the current champ. "Fighting Stacy's always been an audition for Charlize, but I'm not totally convinced Stacy's not the tougher test. Her legs are stronger, and she's very spirited - I never see her taking rounds off like Charlize does. So getting Stacy done is a great first step...and I can't wait to take it."

Keibler all smiles - flirty with press - carefree during photoshoot standoffs with Landry. Lovely young blonde coming into her own as an upbeat, hard-to-ruffle, beauty. "I've got a few treats in store for Ali," Stacy winks at podium. "Some new looks and punches - she's definitely gonna hate it. This is my time to shine and make a statement; I'm moving forward from this point on, and she's going to start getting pushed back."

Ali in gold bikini; black gloves; dark curls loose. Stacy in bright baby blue bandeau bikini - ring connections at hips and jugs plus neck loop support; white gloves; loose long blonde hair.

Round 1: Stop and go action...Ali jabbing her way in, reaching round Stacy's back, walking her to ropes, mauling her, getting ref's break. Against ropes, Ali keeping snug - head rubbing across Stacy's face; shoulders rolling, hands pulling at Stacy's wrists, pulling apart her guard. Landry tucking in body punches, and clubbing Stacy's pecs: just good, close-in brawling to reduce Stacy. Final minute - Keibler attacks at mid-ring: wide, crook-armed right hand loops round Ali's left flank, chopping in palm-down behind Landry's elbow; sudden, stiff left jab to Ali's face or chest, pushing her backward. Landry grimacing from the right hands when they land: Stacy generating tremendous willowy whip on them, landing sumptuous in above golden left hip.

Round 2: Early surprise: Stacy's committed to body. Keibler flat footed, aggressive - looping either hand in around Landry's elbows, carving at hips and ribs, scooping at them. Stacy often landing the right, then immediately stiff-jabbing the left - weird two-beat slugging often rattling Landry. Ali more orthodox - keeping elbows in, crouching down: she's looking to answer hooks and right hands, timing Keibler for hurt. Down the stretch, Keibler leads a wide, slapping left to Ali's body: Landry answers a swinging right, catching Keibler to chin, buzzing long blonde legs. Stacy staggers to ropes, eyes wide: Landry hops in compact, bending herself into a PLOWING right hand against Stacy's fleshy chest: clapping spank wrenches cry of pain from Keibler as she lolls back on ropes at bell. Landry parting with a single pitiless glance - checking the hurt.

Round 3: Keibler up-tempos - vigorously attacking Ali mid-ring. Landry forming a rigid V front - elbows together beneath her breasts, hands cupping her face - conceding initiative. Stacy weight on left (lead) leg - left elbow raised as she flicks knocking (almost backhand) jabs...leans into slinging rights...slashes back across Ali's tummy via the lean left hook. Keibler loping to her left - long legs/wide stance - turning Ali, staying on her. Busy, long-limbed lashing, keeping Landry covered up: she's just turning, taking. By the minute mark - Stacy's punches are penetrating: the right hand's punching Ali's head off her gloves; those ripping hooks tug at paunch. Landry trusting her curvy legs - squaring into punishment, keeping her V front in place, but Stacy's really painting on the hurt. Down the stretch - streaming right pounds Ali's head back, loosening her: wide, long armed slapping hook turns Ali's head aside, driving her back into ropes. Keibler closing in, looming over Landry as Ali stoops forward behind mitts: gorgeous, crook-armed beating issued, blonde to brunette. Stacy just popping her hips left and right - looping those bent-arm haymakers in behind Ali's elbows, digging in palm-down above the hips. Bell: Stacy glowing, hopping away all sunny and blonde. Landry hugging throbbing ribs, blinking back tears after a fearsome onslaught against her pageant-winning core.

Round 4: Keibler attacks: rangy, looping right hand palm-down to body - that same slinging, heavy stroke; a sudden stiff-jab follow up, punching Ali's face. Sweeping right claps Ali's face aside, putting her wobbly butt: Keibler leaning forward all lean and long, grinning at the clout. Thick, swinging hook takes Ali to paunch as Keibler executes gorgeous pivot-left: blonde punching and moving as well as she ever has, hurting Landry terribly. Ali reeling, but firming: she catches Stacy a short right/left as Keibler's throwing righty to flank, finally pre-empting the blonde. More brutal give and take as Stacy straightens up, stops pivoting: Ali's clubbing her way forward - Stacy licking uppercuts and stepping back supple. Expensive progress for Landry as she's checked again and again to chin: she finally bullies Keibler to ropes, pounding a series of rights and lefts to waistline to force breathless blonde clinch. Keibler groaning, trying to walk Ali off the ropes: Landry pushes in deep, throwing her shoulder into Stacy's mouth as ref's issuing break. Landry hurt, but focused: she lunges in a short, lead right hand, punching Stacy's head back and putting her ropeside again. Keibler wobbly, folds face into gloves, drooping forward as Ali sets up strong beneath. THUMPING rib-work, Landry to Keibler; Ali just leaning forward, moving her hands in a brisk, rolling barrage. Stacy swaying on the spot, paralyzed to the body as Ali finally answers, and answers, with vigor. Bell: Ali's still bumping, still slugging: ref pulls seething beauty off crippled foe as Stacy leans back into ropes, hands still covering her face.

Round 5: Stacy's hurt, doesn't care: looping palm-down right pounds in behind Ali's left elbow, followed by that prodding left jab. Landry hooks back in anger, then plows into Stacy's chest via overhand right, pouring forward as blonde reels backward. Stacy hits ropes snarling, bounces back into Ali with right uppercut to body, then a thrown-shoulder to mouth as girls are too tight to punch. Ali staggers away...Stacy lopes in with that flicking elbow-up jab knocking at face. Looping right hand caroms off Ali's forehead, dashing her to ropes: she bounces forward face-in-gloves, doubled over. Keibler's hair in her eyes, teeth bared as she unleashes that bandy-armed assault on Ali's waist, beating the woman around her elbows. Landry sobbing, pushes into Stacy' wrapping up around her waist, driving her to ropes at the stagger. Left arm still round the back, Ali works right hands to hip-flexor and thigh, pounding at that sleek tanned muscle: Keibler tosses her head back and cries out, arms light around Ali's head and shoulders. Ref pulls girls apart, reads 'em the riot act: chests heaving, eyes blazing - fighters can't wait to lunge back in. Stacy pops hips, drags a whippy hook into Ali's tender ribs: Landry back with that swift right, swiping Stacy's chops, loosening her legs. Keibler finally wobbly-butt - stumbling away in stunned dismay: deep breath Ali as she walks her blonde down. Bruising follow up sees Landry batter Stacy with sudden, blunt lefts or rights to head - lanky blonde lass sliding helplessly along ropes, legs spastic beneath her. Final moments see Stacy leaning against ropes for support, trying to cover up earmuff. Landry squares up close, rubbing mitts and shoulders side to side in brawny shoe-shine - disrupting defenses, then pouring through the openings via short, clubbing lefts and rights. Crowd (including hard-to-impress fighters) standing, roaring - bell clanging: Stacy beaten into stupor; Landry blubbering with exhaustion.

Round 6: Landry in oxygen debt, but Stacy reeling off her stool is too tempting a prize: deep breath Ali, then she's across the ring, eyes determined. Right hand lead grazes Stacy's chin, spooking her: blonde reels sideways into ropes, face groggy. Stiff, rising left jab knocks at Stacy's pate; straight, stabbing right slants down into solar plexus, punching a shout from Keibler. Hook; hook: Ali in close, popping hips-right, digs up into Stacy's ribs, bunching blondie up. Stacy groaning, wilting forward - she brings mitts to her temples as Ali props blonde up a brawny left shoulder. Landry with that side to side sexy shoe-shine bumps apart Stacy's guard, then starts landing short to the face: Keibler lolls back against ropes, eyelashes fluttering. HAMMERING right hand wide and loud to Stacy's pecs: she sobs in pain, cringing helplessly under the whack. Ali's all in - lefts and rights pouring onto Stacy now - pounding her face, beating her fleshy chest. Blonde girl in stupor, upright, swaying at ropes, facing into blows...legs just too damn strong for the fighter's good. Ali humming, bronzed back, buns, shoulders and legs all working in harmony, pumping in the hurt as Stacy sways shabby on the spot and the REF STEPS IN! TKO6 Landry in blazing fashion.

Afterward: Ali collapsing to her back, knees up, hands above her head, chest shuddering as she sobs in utter exhaustion: Landry's never dug deeper to grind out a win. Stacy swaying; hair obscuring half her face - all numb and woozy; eyes bleak with defeat. What a fight - Ali digging deep into her champion's heart to turn back the ever-improving Stacy K tonight.

* * * *

From her seat at ringside, Kelly Brook fixed a cold glare on Ali Landry as the older brunette celebrated her knockout victory over Stacy Keibler. Ali had just been through six of the hardest rounds anyone had seen her fight in recent memory, but in spite of being much worse for wear, she was parading around the ring cheerfully as though she'd won the Miss USA pageant all over again.

Surveying the blonde wreckage, a cruel smile crossed Ali's lips as she looked over at Stacy slumped on her stool in her corner, leaning against the turnbuckle. Kelly had seen that look on Ali's face before; it was one any self-respecting celebrity boxing fan should be familiar with. Gloves off, Ali sauntered over to Stacy's corner, pulled the rubber-legged blonde to her feet by the hair and led her to mid-ring.

Ali released her quarry, walked a few steps away, then quickly turned around and charged!

“UNNNGH!” An anguished cry escaped Stacy's lips as Ali's shoulder slammed into her midsection, driving her to the canvas flat on her back! Everyone knew what was coming next!

Ever since the match signing, Stacy had made it known she planned to pin Ali to the mat at the end of the fight and Ali had no intention of letting Stacy forget what, in hindsight, had been a very ill-conceived boast. Turnabout, after all, was fair play!

The brunette took her time laying herself perpendicular across the blonde's torso, stretching out Stacy's arms. Ali cinched up Stacy's left arm between her thighs and she made a good show of wiggling her gorgeous butt in the air as she wrapped her legs around Stacy's leg; painstakingly finding the exact position she wanted. Pressing down on Stacy's breasts with her midsection, Ali ran the blonde's upper arm through her cleavage while she clamped down on Stacy's right wrist with both hands.

Looking up at the referee with a come-hither stare, Ali let her words ooze out of her mouth in her sexiest and sultriest tone, "Well, y'all...isn't someone gonna count this lil' ol' blonde out?"

In a rare show of competency from an official, the referee quickly ran in and dropped to his knees, then slapped his hand against the mat once, and then a second time, pausing in dramatic fashion as Stacy attempted to kick out at two and a half. But the tall, willowy blonde was spent and unable to dislodge Ali, who rode the blonde with ease as the referee's hand hit the mat a third time, sealing the pinfall!

Ali continued to pin Stacy, letting the blonde exhaust herself in fruitless attempts to escape. Ali playfully gulped her hips at Stacy's shoulder, taunting her as the blonde's weak attempts to kick out and buck her tormentor off avail her nothing. As Stacy's struggles subside, Ali finally released her and sat up - but she wasn't done. Kneeling on top of the prone blonde, Ali hooked Stacy's leg and pressed her free hand against her foe's chest.

"Count her again!" Ali demanded brusquely, to be immediately followed by another diligent 1-2-3 count. Releasing Stacy's leg, Ali straddled the blonde's waist, reached down with her hands and pressed on Stacy's shoulders.

"Again," Ali ordered and once again the referee complied with another 1-2-3!

Kelly's eyes narrowed as she watched Ali work. The older brunette was being vindictive, and the crowd was eating out of her hand! A few scattered boos could be heard from the few fans in the audience still loyal to Stacy, but they were quickly, and forcefully, drowned out by more cheers egging Ali on.

Crawling forward, Ali turned around to face Stacy's legs and planted her knees on either side of the blonde's head. Stacy visibly shook her head as Ali's magnificent posterior descended, but she had no strength left to resist and Ali's full weight came down on her in a Reverse Facesit.

Stacy bucked and writhed with renewed vigor, desperate to escape from this new humiliation. There was no dislodging Ali though. Resting her hands on the blonde's breasts, the brunette reveled in her triumph by grinding her hips and rubbing her ass back and forth across her foe's face. Stacy's struggles slowly subsided, and before long she was practically motionless beneath her conqueror.

Sitting in her seat, Kelly smoldered in silence. This was Ali at her most vindictive; a side of her Kelly hadn't seen in full force for a long time. The young brunette was sure it wouldn't be long before she and Ali clashed again.

Looking out into the crowd, Ali's eyes met Kelly's. Flashing a wicked smile, Ali cradled her breasts with her arms to emphasize her cleavage and batted her eyes seductively at the referee.

"Count her again, please," Ali purred, "I don't think she's getting up; do y'all?" Her request was met with yet another 1-2-3 count from the grinning referee.

Glancing back at Kelly, Ali blew her a kiss, drawling a snarl from Kelly's lips. Rising to her feet, Ali surveyed the blonde wreckage at her feet. Stacy was barely clinging on to consciousness, her chest rising and falling as she took in the air that had been denied to her. It wouldn't last long. Reaching down for the blonde's hair, Ali pulled Stacy to her hands and knees and led her to the ropes by where Kelly was sitting. Letting Stacy sink to her haunches, Ali knelt in front of her and pulled the blonde's face down to her heaving cleavage. Wrapping her right hand into Stacy's hair, she clamped her left arm around the blonde's neck, cinching up the breast smother.

Stacy's cries were muffled as she writhed in Ali's grasp - desperately pawing at Ali's hips and belly; trying frantically to break free. Ali merely smiled and continued to squeeze tightly, clearly enjoying the feeling of the blonde's face pressed against her cleavage. Exhausted, it wasn't long before Stacy's struggles subsided and her hands dropped limp to her side.

Kelly blushed at the sight of Ali having her way with the blonde - a mix of resentment at the sight of Ali triumphant; discomfort at the sight of Ali doing it so well and perhaps more than a little envy at not having Keibler's countenance under her cooze as well.

Looking out into the crowd at Kelly, Ali flashed her infuriating smile as she released Stacy with a flourish and let the limp blonde topple over onto her back.

"Just think," Ali taunted Kelly, "That could be you someday in the near future!"

Kelly sat silently, glaring back angrily at Ali. Some day - some day soon, the reckoning would come. When it did, Kelly was determined that it would be Ali's face jammed between her jugs - not the other way around...

From the back of the arena, a glowering Charlize Theron watched tight-lipped as Landry subdued another blonde icon. Charlize knew she had a target on her back and it would be only a matter of time before Landry, Brook, or some other brunette called her number and issued the challenge. She just hoped Ali and Kelly were so determined to reap the glory that they’d wear each other out before one or the other got around to her!

Continue to the Keibler-Landry rematch (NHB wrestling)