Pickman's Masterpiece #7 by The Walkin' Dude
Part One: Jennifer Lopez vs. Rachel Bilson (this story continued from Pickman #6)

Standing alone in her corner of the ring, Rachel Bilson looked nervously towards the curtains at the top of the stage muttered, "Me and my big fucking mouth." The brunette had let her trash talking get her into some unpleasant situations before, but the one after the show last week, that was why she was here now, getting ready to face off with... well, everybody already knew that didn't they? That thought was still floating through her head when the Announcer brought up his microphone and proclaimed…

"And introducing her opponent, standing 5’5” and making her DEBUT with the promotion this evening - ladies and gentlemen I give to you ‘The Latina Supreme’….Ms. Jennifer Loooooopez! Lopez!"

The jarring, raucous opening to Drowning Pool's 'Step Up' roared through the R'lyeh Club and the crowd screamed its approval as Fannin's most high profile acquisition to date finally stepped the curtain and made her presence felt. Standing on the top of the ramp, it was easy to see why Lopez was one of the biggest names in women's wrestling; she just LOOKED like a star. For her first night's work in the promotion, Jennifer was wearing a gleaming white bikini that seemed to glow under the mellow club lights while also accentuating her tanned skin. The chromatic scheme was carried through to her boots and fingerless gloves as well, not to mention the ankle length ring robe that hung open just wide enough to offer the fans the sight detailed above.

With a small, tight, smile on her face, J-Lo began her triumphant strut toward the ring as - as if possible - the crowd energy went up another few decibel levels. Even covered by her coat, it was impossible to mask the swing of the newcomer's near-mythic hips, and it was safe to say even the J-Lo haters couldn’t wait for the unveililng of her 'weapon of ass destruction'! They didn't have to wait long. When she reached the apron, J-Lo shrugged off her coat and laid it over the steel steps. Not even bothering to look at her opponent, Jennifer wiggled her hips at the crowd and proceeded to place an entire audience in the palm of her hand by swinging her right leg up and stretching it out on the apron in an impressive display of her dancer’s flexibility. After a few beats, she grabbed the middle rope in both hands and swung her other leg up, completing the splits on the apron before ducking her head and sinuously sliding in under the bottom rope.

Rising to her feet, J-Lo regarded the mob with a, 'You KNOW you liked it' grin as she swaggered jauntily to her corner; that magnificent ass jiggling and bouncing delightfully.

DING! DING! DING! With the theatrics concluded, the bell for the night's penultimate match tolled and the contest got underway. Strutting out of her corner, Jen finally took the time to glance at Rachel and noticed that the normally energetic brunette was very tentative in leaving her corner. Putting her hands on her hips, Lopez waited patiently while Rachel made her way to the center of the ring and stopped a few feet away.

Regarding Rachel with a smirk, Lopez said, "This is it honey; your chance to prove to all these people that I'm the lard ass fraud you say I am. And I want to let you try, so to show there’s no hard feelings I'll give you the first shot. Hell, I might even let you have two. Whaddaya say?"

Rachel knew that Lopez was mocking her, but she just couldn't turn down the opportunity to take an unprotected shot at the overrated bitch. Not even bothering to acknowledge her acceptance of J-Lo’s offer, Rachel shot forward, balled her right hand into a fist and WHAM smashed Jen's jaw with as much force as she could muster. The Latina Heartbreaker’s head snapped to the side and remained turned for a heartbeat or two as she slowly reached up and touched her lip, checking for blood. Finding none, she turned back to face a gaping Rachel.

Her smile returning, Jen admitted, "That WAS a pretty good punch, but you need to put some momentum behind it. Maybe get a running start? Go ahead, try it and see what happens…I did say you could have two."

Finally finding her voice, Rachel snarled, "That's all I'll need." The smaller brunette took off towards the ropes, threw herself against them and launched her body back toward the waiting Latina. Watching carefully as Rachel cut the distance between them, J-Lo hissed, "Correction honey. One’s all you're going to GET."

When Bilson came within five feet, closing fast, J-Lo suddenly exploded forward with a short leap and pulled a lightning-fast 180-degree turn in midair; catching Rachel full in her impressive chest with the wide expanse of her backside. THUD! To Rachel, the impact felt like a medicine ball smashing her breasts flat and she reacted accordingly, collapsing to the mat with both arms crossed over her aching breasts as her mouth opened and closed as she tried to catch her breath.

Standing up with one leg cocked forward, Jen surveyed the after-effects of her buttwork, Jennifer made a few adjustments to her ivory bottom as she announced to the delighted audience, "I KNOW WHAT YOU CAME TO SEE!"

She bent down and hair-hauled the shell-shocked and breathless Rachel to her feet. Grabbing the smaller girl's left wrist in both hands, J-Lo Irish Whipped the wheezing brunette toward the most convenient corner as hard as she could. As soon as Rachel’s back slammed hard into the turnbuckles, J-Lo dropped into a low crouch and sprinted forward….leaving her feet in a gorgeous leap, that ended when she absolutely CRUSHED her body into Rachel's. Jen draped her arms over Rachel’s shoulders after the Avalanche Splash, breathing on Rachel's pain-drenched face as she allowed her body to overwhelm and engulf her diminutive opponent's frame.

Pressing her lips to the brunette's ear, Jen purred, "You should learn to keep your mouth shut baby. Otherwise, people like me will gladly do it for you."

Peeling herself off of Rachel’s slumping body, J-Lo let the overmatched beauty take a couple of staggering steps out of the corner before she scooped her up over her shoulder and carried her upside down back to the corner where she SMACK, slammed Rachel's back against the turnbuckles, threading Bilson’s victim's legs over the top robes on either side of the turnbuckle, then folding them at the knees; tying the ingénue in an unenviable Tree of Woe! Jostling Rachel's thighs to make sure she was securely trapped, Jen nodded and backed out to center ring.

Letting her hands slowly rub her vaunted rump, Lopez exclaimed, "You wanna see me back it up?"

The crowd responded that they would like that very much, even though Jennifer had not told them exactly what 'It' was but when J-Lo asked the question, it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what the 'It' was. Based on the positive audience response, Jennifer sprinted away from Rachel, picking up an ungodly head of steam even before she reached the ropes. Rebounding off the cables, the powerful newcomer increased her pace as she cut across the ring toward the corner where Rachel was strung up and waiting helplessly. When she got close, Jennifer left her feet and again performed the blindingly-fast about face that left her backside to her victim. Timing her descent perfectly, J-Lo pulled her legs up and extended them in front of her, making sure there was nothing to get in the way the butt battering ram aimed at Rachel's upside-down face. A split second later, J-Lo's cheeks THWAP smashed into Rachel's face with the force of a knockout punch.

The impact of J-Lo’s Booty Bomb rattled Rachel’s head between Jen’s butt and the unforgiving steel turnbuckles, Lopez got to her feet just in time to see the insensate brunette’s body unhinge from the corner and drop in a limp puddle in the corner. Knowing the time to end this glorified sparring session was at hand, she reached down, buried a hand in Rachel's hair, using it to haul the girl's dead weight up more or less vertical. Allowing Rachel to lean on her, J-Lo smiled malevolently as she went to work.

Holding Rachel byt the hair at arms length, she dipped her shoulder and hefted her into a Fireman's Carry with no discernible effort. Holding her, Jen looped her near arm behind Rachel’s' neck and cinched it tight. She made a slow circuit of the ring before using her other arm to shove Rachel’s legs up off her shoulders, sending her torso and legs out behind her. Still holding Rachel's head in the crook of her arm, the Latina Supreme sat out hard, driving the back of Rachel’s head and neck to the canvas, in a viciously inventive modification of the Death Valley Driver aka the Air Raid Crash, a move J-Lo had christened for her childhood neighborhood, 'Once Around the Block.' Whatever the name, the skull-jarring move left Rachel starfished; completely at Jennifer's mercy.

Sitting up on her haunches, Lopez cracked her knuckles and told Rachel, "You should be honored hon. You're going to be the first girl in this place to take my 'Smother Challenge.' You won't win, but that's beside the point. As long as everyone remembers my ass all over your face, we can both rest easy."

With those ominous words, Jen rolled Rachel onto her stomach and scrambled down to her feet where she took Rachel’s ankles and folded her legs up, crossing her ankles as she pinned them tight against the Rachel's own butt. Making sure Rachel's legs were thoroughly immobilized, Jen next rolled Rachel onto her so Bilson’s legs were trapped under her own body. Moving to the next stage of the challenge, Jen got up and sauntered back to Rachel's head, slowly stepped over her and straddled Rachel’s waist.

Looking over her shoulder and the wide swell of her butt, Jennifer purred, "Now, here comes the best part!"

J-Lo dropped to her knees and applied a Reverse Straddle but with one small difference: instead of pinning Rachel's arms with her legs, J-Lo wedged her calves under Rachel’s arms, lifting her shoulders off the mat by just a few inches. Making sure her boots were tucked tightly to either side of Rachel's face, Jennifer reached back with both hands and made a grand spectacle of tugging up her already skimpy bikini bottom until it resembled a near non-existent thong. Almost ready, she grabbed the beaten girl's wrists and crisscrossed them over her thighs; left holding right; right holding left. Grinning like the cat that swallowed the canary, Jennifer FINALLY leaned back to apply her Reverse Face Sit.

As always, the crowd went nuts at any application of the Face Sit, but it was only after a few seconds that the sheer hellish genius of Lopez’ Smother Challenge dawned on them. With her hands tightly bound and her legs pinned by the combined weight of both bodies, so there was no possible way for her to tap out. And on the verbal side, J-Lo’s sizable butt served as an effective gag, blocking any screams of surrender or pleas for mercy Rachel might have offered.

If that weren’t enough, as a final insult, J-Lo's shins under her arms kept Rachel’s shoulders just up off the canvas, meaning she couldn't rely on the referee’s three count to end her suffering. And suffer Rachel did! The sudden lack of air snapped her around, but it wasn’t a reality she wanted to wake up to! Her face was deep into the cleft of Jennifer's rump and the more she tried to fight, the deeper her face disappeared into the ultimate air deprivation weapon. Finding escape impossible, Rachel tried to tap out or scream her concession, but all her efforts amounted to nothing more than a frantic twitching of limbs and a muffled, "UUUMMMPPPHHHH!" that went unheard by everyone but Jennifer although she felt it more than heard it!

From her perch on Rachel’s nose, Jen maintained a steamy South Beach rhythm on her face for the better part of a minute, until she felt the smaller girl’s struggles cease as her body went limp beneath her. Pausing, Jen gave a few final grinds of her hips just to make sure, then cooed loud enough for the ring microphones to pick up, "Looks like baby's gone to sleep." Releasing the torturous hold, J-Lo rose to her feet and arrogantly planted a boot on Rachel's sweaty cheek, rubbing the sole of her boot back and forth as she glared at the referee and snapped, "I think Rachel would want you to end this now!”

Understanding a pin was being made, the ref dropped down and slapped the mat, 'ONE... TWO... THREE!'

The bell rang again and Jennifer Lopez had won her first match in Richard Fannin's promotion. Removing her boot from Rachel's face, the Latina Supreme raised her hands in victory and silently mouthed, "Spread the word people. J-Lo's finally here and no one, AND I MEAN NO ONE is safe." Having made her point, the arrogant diva made a few strutting laps around the ring before slipping through the ropes and heading up the ramp....


Part Two: Sarah Michelle Gellar/Katie Holmes vs. Kaley Cuoco/Lacey Chabert

A few minutes later...after ring was cleared following the brief but merciless massacre of Rachel Bilson. The announcer stepped back into the ring and declared, "Ladies and Gentlemen, it is time for the night's Main Event! Introducing first, they are the challengers; standing at 5’8” and 5’3” respectively, they are Kaley Cuoco and Lacey Chabert!"

Marilyn Manson's 'The Fight Song' roared through the club and the challengers breezed their way through the curtain. Standing at the top of the ramp, Kaley and Lacey posed for the crowd as they prepared for the fight of their lives. For their first ever tag team title shot, the blonde and the brunette were clad in matching black vinyl one-piece suits with a trio of bright orange horizontal slashes running up either side. Their ensemble was completed with matching black boots and pads. Having waited long enough, Lacey and Kaley break into a sprint as they race to the ring and slide under the bottom rope before hopping to their feet for a final cheer from the crowd. As their music died, Kaley and Lacey head to their corner to await the arrival of the champions.

Catching his breath, the Announcer continued, "And their opponents, they stand 5’10” and 5’3” respectively...and they are the current Tag Team Champions…allow me to present, Katie Holmes and ‘The Slayer’, Sarah Michelle Gellar!"

'Man in the Box' growls to life and the crowd welcome the champs back with a rousing ovation. As the other blonde and brunette tandem appears on stage, the mob notes that even after all this time as a team, Sarah Michelle and Katie have never bothered to go for the matching look. Katie is still wearing the fog gray bikini and matching pads while Sarah Michelle sports a blood red leather one-piece and knee-high black boots. They carry the tag team title belts over their shoulders as they stride down the ramp and enter the ring. Handing the titles to the referee, they confer quietly in their corner in the last few seconds of the pre-match ceremonies.


The bell echoed loudly in the confines of the small arena and the biggest match in the careers of Lacey and Kaley was officially underway. With a final glance towards the opposing corner, both teams decided that the blondes would kick off the evening's festivities as the champs sent out the Slayer while the challengers countered with Kaley. Approaching the smaller girl with a greater degree of caution than usual (apparently her loss a few months ago to Selma Blair taught her a few things). Kaley’s perpetual smirk was replaced by a hard, determined look. Kaley and Lacey had worked hard to climb the ranks over the past weeks and neither was about to let this opportunity for gold slip away, even if they had to go through the reigning World Champion to get there.

Taking a moment to adjust her elbow pads, Kaley sank into a tense crouch and extended her fingers towards the advancing Slayer. Licking her lips, Kaley locked eyes with Sarah Michelle and said calmly, "Come and get it Sarah."

Sarah Michelle, being who she was, didn't need a second invitation and she responded to Kaley's challenge by adopting a crouch of her own. Circling to her left, she gets closer to Kaley with every revolution until their fingertips are nearly brushing. Never letting her gaze leave Kaley's face, Sarah Michelle lunged forward in a blur of motion and engaged the larger blonde in a simple Collar and Elbow Tie-Up.

The challenger was momentarily taken off guard by her opponent's lightning fast charge, but she managed to regain her bearings before Sarah Michelle was able to march her more than a few steps back. Planting her feet against the canvas, Kaley leaned back and then shoved forward as hard as she could, simultaneously breaking the clench and sending Sarah Michelle tumbling to the mat in an awkward sprawl. Or at least in looked like an awkward sprawl until Sarah Michelle rolled through and popped to her feet in a nimble little somersault looking none the worse for wear.

Watching Sarah Michelle adjust her gloves, Kaley thought she was going to have to come to the Slayer, but Sarah Michelle exploding forward in a second lunge that ended much as the first had; with another Collar and Elbow Tie-Up. The basic contest of strength was a little more even this time, Sarah Michelle even managed to force Kaley down to a knee before the statuesque challenger powered to her feet and shoved her away, sending Sarah Michelle backpedaling into the ropes.

Regarding the Slayer with confident, calculating eyes, Kaley told the champ, "You may be better than me a lot of things Sarah Michelle, but power isn't one of them. If you insist on trying to push me around you're gonna find out what happens when I REALLY start pushing back."

A bit aggravated that Kaley was imposing her will in such a fashion, Sarah Michelle nodded and replied, "I suppose you're right Kaley, I shouldn't try to out-muscle you. But damn it, sometimes I just can't help myself." Sarah Michelle smiled and came in fast with her hands up at her shoulders and Kaley rushed into meet the Slayer with open arms. Unfortunately for the bigger blonde, that was just what Sarah Michelle wanted and in the breath before Kaley could lock up with her again, Sarah went low and slipped under her foe's grasping hands. Realizing she'd been outmaneuvered, Kaley cursed under her breath and spun around on her heel.

THWACK! Kaley's cursing suddenly got a lot louder as the ever-aware Slayer snapped her right leg out and fetched Kaley a painful lick to the left thigh. The tall blonde grimaced and took a step back; lowering her guard to protect the welt Sarah Michelle's strike had created. That was a mistake as Sarah Michelle resumed her stance immediately and fired a second kick, SMACK this one aimed at Kaley's now exposed right thigh. There was a meaty impact as booted foot connected with bare flesh and this time Kaley dropped to her knees. With Kaley now hobbled, Sarah Michelle looked to put her away fast!

Taking two steps back, Sarah Michelle slipped effortlessly into a martial arts stance and fired a third kick, this one aimed directly at Kaley's temple. If the brutal precision strike had connected, the match would have been over before it even had a chance to begin, but as luck would have it, Kaley was able to get her arms up in the nick of time and her forearms absorbed most of the force of the kick. Kaley managed to avert the worst of the disaster, but a kick from Sarah Michelle is nothing to joke about - regardless of where it hits - and Kaley learned this the hard way as fire raced up and down her arms from the point of impact.

Regaining her balance, Sarah Michelle admonished herself for the poor timing on the kick and quickly went back on the offensive. As Kaley was still trying to get her legs under her, Sarah Michelle executed a short, vertical leap that ended with her thighs clamped around Kaley's head and her crotch inches from the challenger's nose. In one graceful movement, Sarah Michelle locked her ankles, popped her hips and fell back; yanking Kaley off her feet and tossing the bigger girl head over heels to the canvas with an incredibly fast application of the Hurricanrana.

Kaley hit the mat with a brisk THUD but she fought down the blossom of pain in her lower back and scrambled to her feet. Flipping hair out of her eyes, Kaley saw Sarah Michelle dashing toward her for another attack. She decided to show the champ she wasn't the only one who could move fast. Setting her feet on the mat, Kaley surged forward and shot out her right arm, catching Sarah Michelle directly across the chest with a Clothesline that took the Slayer off her feet as Kaley dropped to her knees. Allowing herself a small smile, Kaley wasted no time wrapping her fingers in Sarah Michelle's hair and Hair-Hauling the smaller girl to her feet.

Focusing her attack on Sarah Michelle's torso, Kaley pulled the champ close and wrapped her hands around the other blonde's slender neck. Squeezing, Kaley hissed fiercely, "The belts are leaving with us!"

She lifted straight up, hauling Sarah Michelle into the air with a brutally simple Two Handed Choke-Lift. While there was no denying the move more than ably displayed Kaley's height and power advantage over her opponent, it was still nothing more than an illegal choke hold and the ref acted accordingly, stepping in to begin his five count shortly after the Slayer's feet left the mat. But it turns out the official was worried for nothing, because he'd barely gotten to 'THREE' when Sarah Michelle lifted both arms directly overhead and brought them smashing down into the trapezium muscle at the base of Kaley's neck. Kaley let out a stunned grunt and immediately released the choke, allowing Sarah Michelle hit the mat with her knees in a landing that was much less graceful than usual.

Ignoring the dull, but somehow biting pain in her shoulders, Sarah Michelle exploded out of the crouch in another beautiful vertical leap that ended with her driving both black booted heels into Kaley's chest in a Standing Dropkick. The challenger was caught completely unaware by the Dropkick knocked backward in a drunken stagger that dropped her on her butt in the safety of her own corner. Ready to take a break, Kaley reached up to Lacey and said, "She's all yours shorty."

Lacey slapped her partner's palm, "Thanks, I'm going to take all I can."

The curvy brunette vaulted over the tope rope and bounded towards the still recovering Slayer. Not waiting for Sarah Michelle to fully rise, Lacey dug a hand into the blonde's hair and held her bent over as she hammered short, sharp punches into Sarah Michelle's face. Lacey managed to land more than a half dozen shots before the Slayer regrouped and forced Lacey away by driving two-handed, open-palm smashes into the brunette's belly. Smiling as Lacey shielded her abs with one arm, Sarah Michelle sprang to her feet and checked her face for cuts.

Finding nothing serious, Sarah Michelle glanced at Lacey and asked, "You always make a habit of slugging a girl when she's on her knees?"

Smiling mischievously at the champ, Lacey fired back with, "No, normally I prefer smothering a girl when she's on her knees, but I didn't want to rush into that. There will be plenty of time for you to get acquainted with the twins later on tonight." She sensuously ran her right hand over the swell of her breasts, smiling coyly at the blushing blonde.

Gellar was singularly unimpressed and, putting her hands on her hips, the red-clad vixen chided, "Williams tells me you whimper like a baby when she so much as lays a finger on those. How’n hell’re you gonna take it when I start kickin' em right off your chest? And let's not forget about Katie; I'm sure there's all sorts of nasty things SHE’D love to do to a clueless little jug mugger like you."

Hating the dismissive way Sarah Michelle responded to her threat of her self-described ‘deadly’ Breast Smother, Lacey stalked forward and slammed her chest into Sarah Michelle’s, rocking the blonde back a few steps. Snarling at the shaken blonde, Lacey taunted, "The only chance you'll get to touch my boobs is when they're pressing in against your face. And you shouldn't even be allowed to make tit jokes Sarah Michelle. I mean, look at you; didn't Fannin volunteer to get you upgraded by at least one cup size after you became champion? Seems like your new nickname should be The SLAAYER."

Ignoring the mild flush creeping into her cheeks, Sarah Michelle waited just long enough for Lacey to stop talking before she lashed her left hand out and SMACK slapped the smug brunette with a Forehand Slap. Breathing hard as Lacey regarded her with a hurt 'how dare you' espression, Sarah Michelle went nose-to-nose with the challenger and hissed, "I'm gonna make sure to bounce my ass on your saggy tits while the ref counts you out tonight Lacey. You're a mouthy little punk and I'm gonna make you pay fo…”


“…UNNGGGH!" The Slayer's threat was cut off when Lacey nailed her with a slap of her own. Feeding off the fire burning in her eyes, Lacey walked Sarah Michelle down and grabbed her right wrist in both hands. Not bothering to back her to the ropes, Lacey Irish Whipped Sarah Michelle to the far side of the ring and then stepped moved forward to meet her as she returned. When Sarah Michelle came within range, Lacey doubled over, then straightened up fast, shoulder tossing Sarah Michelle toward the lights. She came down hard from the ring-rattling Back Body Drop.

Lacey grinned vindictively as the squared circle displayed the aftereffects of Sarah Michelle's landing but the smile soon faded when Sarah Michelle rolled onto her side faster than she had any right to. Getting back to the task at hand, Lacey sauntered forward and graciously helped Sarah Michelle back to her feet with a double handful of hair. Her charity ended there as she immediately drove an unpadded knee into the pit of the blonde's stomach. Beaming proudly into Sarah Michelle's stunned face; Lacey stepped to the Slayer's left and grabbed hold of the blonde's arm, pulling it tight across her chest. Preparing to deliver the Single Arm DDT, Lacey turned her head to glance at Sarah Michelle and purred, "It's going to be even more impressive when you're doing all the fancy karate with one arm Sarah. I'm sure all the organizations for helping broken down losers will want you to be a guest lectURRRRGGHH!"

Lacey's verbal barb never got finished thanks in part to Sarah Michelle yanking her arm free and driving her elbow into Lacey's temple. Lacey let out low groan and tried to stagger toward her corner, but Sarah Michelle wasn't having any of it. Lunging after the retreating brunette, she grabbed two handfuls of Lacey's hair and twirled her around, pointing her toward the Champion’s corner. Taking her eyes off her opponent for a moment, Sarah Michelle nodded at her partner for Katie to get clear of the corner. Waiting just long enough for the tall brunette to do so, Sarah Michelle took Lacey's wrist and sent the curvy vixen hurtling towards the unforgiving steel with an Irish Whip.

The moment Lacey's back smacked the turnbuckles, Sarah Michelle was in motion, sprinting after her stunned prey with a focus and intensity hard to believe, even after all her time in the ring. Waiting until Lacey began to lift her head; Sarah Michelle launched herself in a beautiful leap and soared towards the brunette, ending the short flight by lashing out her left leg and CRACK slamming her calf across Lacey’s nose. There was another brisk CLAP as Sarah Michelle's toned gam snapped Lacey's head back and sent her slumping onto her butt.

Getting her feet under her, Sarah Michelle turned to Katie and asked, "You want in?"

Katie looked from Sarah Michelle to Lacey, shrugged and observed, "She's kinda small. Maybe we should throw her back?"

Sarah Michelle rolled her eyes, "Well, so am I!"

Katie extended her hand for the tag and grinned, "True. I'll just think of you when I'm hitting her."

"How touching," Sarah Michelle muttered as she slapped hands with her partner.

Climbing into the ring over the middle rope, Katie buried her left hand in Lacey’s locks and hauled her to her feet. Pulling the smaller girl out into the center of the ring, Katie doubled the other brunette over with a sharp tug on her hair and said, "Well, you're not much to look at. Let's hope you hit good." Staring down the challenger's back with a decided lack of interest, Katie remained silent as she started driving her knees into Lacey's undefended gut. Katie hit nearly half a dozen of these shots before Lacey’s legs gave way and she sank to her knees. Sighing in disappointment, Katie murmured, "That felt kinda nice, but you're a little too soft for my tastes. Maybe the rest of you is built of sturdier stuff." Releasing her grip on Lacey's hair, Katie settled her hands around the smaller brunette's neck and dug her fingers deep into the meat of Lacey’s shoulders. The Nerve Hold began to take effect almost immediately as evidenced by the pained squirming and wailing that came from the smaller girl. Ratcheting up the pressure on the hold, Katie smiled blandly and said, "Ohh, she moves."

Katie was about to say something else when Lacey balled up a fist and slammed it into the slender girl's belly. Katie grunted and changed tactics by pulling Lacey to her feet. Unlocking her grip on Lacey's shoulders, Katie trapped Lacey in a hard Front Face-Lock and used her free hand to grab a handful of Lacey's black vinyl briefs. Lacey started to utter a cry of protest but then her feet left the mat as Katie hauled her high into the air, almost directly over the taller girl's head. But instead of delivering a typical Vertical Suplex, Katie merely shifted Lacey towards the mat and let go, letting Lacey crash back-first to the canvas compliments of the Drop Suplex.

Paying Lacey's grunts and groans the tiniest bit of attention, Katie kept up the methodical pace of her assault by stalking around to Lacey’s left side and driving two quick Stomps on the curvy brunette's ample chest, the second almost forcing the ample breast flesh right out of her top. The minute Lacey tried to cover up, however, Katie lifted her right elbow over her head, lined up her aim and dropped, putting all her weight into an Elbow Drop that impaled Lacey's unguarded belly! Rolling onto her knees, Katie scooted up to take a position beside Lacey's head then gently placed her left hand on Lacey’s windpipe.

Squeezing very gently, Katie waited for Lacey’s eyes to crack open before she said, "Kaley tried to strangle my partner; it's only fair I do the same for you."

Stifling a laugh as Lacey's eyes went wide, Katie clamped down as tight as she could, stoically maintaining the Blatant Choke in the face of the ref's 'FIVE' count and Lacey's frantic thrashing. Just as the official passed 'FOUR' Katie released Lacey's throat and allowed the smaller girl to draw in a whistling, ragged breath. Utterly confident in her ability to finish off Lacey without too much more trouble, Katie pushed to her feet and stalked behind the smaller girl, making sure to keep her body between Lacey and her team's corner.

Waiting patiently while Lacey rolled over onto her belly, then got to her knees, Katie took two steps back and crouched. The moment Lacey regained her footing, Katie exploded forward and pistoned her boot up THWACK catching Lacey across the cheek as the diminutive brunette was in the process of turning to face her. The Kick took Lacey off her feet in an instant and she hit the mat with all the grace of a sack of wet laundry dropped from great height. Regaining her balance immediately, Katie spun on her heel and regarded her battered opponent with bored, slightly angry, eyes.

Adjusting the edges of her smoky-gray bottoms, Holmes muttered, "If you're not going to put up more of a struggle, I'll just end this right now."

When she got no response, Katie sighed, bent down and hoisted Lacey to her feet with a handful of hair. Pointing the woozy challenger at a neutral side of the ring, Katie grabbed Lacey’s right wrist in both hands and Irish Whipped her to the ropes. As Lacey charged back towards her, Katie stepped forward to intercept her, but Lacey surprised her by going into a Low Slide and sliding right between Katie's legs like a runner stealing home. Before Katie could turn around, Lacey popped to her feet and immediately left them again to drive both boots into her back with a Dropkick. The slender champion let out a low 'OOFH' as, off balance, she staggering several steps before crumpling to her knees with her throat resting on the middle rope.

Behind Katie, Lacey had finally cleared her head and when she saw her lanky foe laying prone in the ropes, her dark eyes lit up. Unable to suppress a grin, Lacey gestured to the crowds for just a moment before bounding into the ropes behind her and sprinting back across the squared circle towards Katie’s kneeling frame. As she drew closer, Lacey never slowed - indeed it seemed she speeded up in the second before she left her feet - and proceeded to literally run up Katie's back before Vaulting high into the air over the top rope. At the apex of her leap, Lacey shifted her weight so she came down parallel to the ring apron. Extending her right leg straight out in front of her, Lacey's grin never faltered as her thigh crashed down on the back of Katie's head in a brilliantly delivered Guillotine Leg Drop.

Katie' head was snapped down violently, bending her windpipe around the unyielding steel cable. The stunned champion made a horrible gurgling sound in the back of her throat as she bounced back off the ropes and collapsed in a heap. On the outside of the ring, Lacey brushed off the last little shock of her landing on the arena floor and popped to her feet.

Sliding back in under the bottom rope, the curvy brunette thought of going after Katie some more, but decided it’d be better to let Kaley have her shot at Katie. Besides, the big blonde could toss Katie around in ways she could only dream about! With that in mind, she grabbed Katie’S ankles and pulled her to the challengers' side of the ring to ensure the breathless babe didn’t make a tag with her eager partner. Dropping her legs, Lacey leaned into the corner and tagged Kaley’s hand.

Slipping through the ropes, she quipped, "I softened her up for ya, Blondie."

Smirking, Kaley entered the ring and said, "Good, I like them tenderized." Making slow, calculating circles around the injured brunette, Kaley recalled the domineering way in which Katie had tried to dissect Lacey and decided some retribution was in order. Stepping in close, Kaley brought her boot up and sneered, "Let's see how you handle getting taken apart, tough girl."

Kaley brought her heel down hard, STOMP, on the small of Katie's back. The champ twitched and tried to crawl towards Sarah Michelle, but Kaley remedied that by Stomping her again, this time the back of Katie’s outstretched hand. Katie yelped as her fingers were mashed into the canvas and she pulled her arm in under her to avoid any further damage, Kaley treated herself to several more Stomps at Katie’s expense; targeting the taller girl's kidney's, butt and thighs.

Standing at Katie's head, Kaley put her hands on her hips and leered down at the brunette. "Now why do you want to go over there? Is the big bad champ getting her skinny-assed kicked by the cocky young challenger?" Answering her own question, Kaley snarled, "Damn right you are, ya overrated cupcake." Enduing her taunting for the moment, she hauled Katie to her feet before doubling the brunette over with a hard Knee Lift to the belly. Smiling widely as she went about her work, Kaley reached down and pulled Katie's arms up, hooking both limbs with her own so that they were tied in a loop behind the brunette. Clasping her hands tightly, she said, "As much as I love tossing around the midgets, there's something very satisfying about subjugating a girl my own size."

She hoisted Katie up and held her inverted, legs high in the air, head and hair pointing down towards the mat. Grinning nastily despite the addition of Katie's weight on her, Kaley proceeded to turn in a slow circle, letting everyone see how she was dominating the former leader of the Darkness. Finally, Kaley felt her arms begin to tremble so she fell back, completing the Double Underhook Suplex by driving the full length of Katie's back into the canvas.

Releasing her arms, Kaley wasted no time in grabbing Katie by the hair and pulling her back to her feet. Acquiring a position she liked, Kaley doubled Katie over with a Belly Punch, then wrapped her arms around her waist, locking her in a simple Gut Wrench. Making sure her hands were clasped tight, Kaley hauled Katie into the air and spun her around in a nearly 270-degree arc before dropping to one knee and smashing Katie down across the posted joint. The Gut Wrench Backbreaker did its job and in an incredibly impressive show of strength, Kaley kept her hands locked as she got to her feet and tossed Katie onto the canvas at her feet.

Basking in her domination of the champion, Kaley gave the crowd a double bicep flex, followed immediately thereafter by the classic 'belt around the waist' motion known to any fan of professional wrestling. Returning her attention to the task of actually winning the tag belts, Kaley stepped up close to Katie's right side and went into a crouch. She held the position for less than a second before she jumped in the air and came down belly first across Katie's defenseless chest. The Splash was delivered perfectly and Katie's lean body was painfully jackknifed under the crushing weight of her foe's frame. Lying arrogantly across Katie for a moment, Kaley raised up on one hand, before blowing on the nails of her other hand and wiping them on her chest, a confidant show of dominance. After tending to her nails, the challenger placed her forearm across Katie's jaw and ground it back and forth.

Looking up at the ref, she admonished, "Would you mind COUNTING now?"

Jerked out of his reverie, the zebra dropped to his knees and counted, 'ONE... TWO' Katie bucked Kaley off of her, breaking the count.

Undeterred, Kaley got back to her feet and strode over to her opponent's feet. After taking a breath to steady her nerves, Kaley bent down and grabbed Katie's ankles, lifting both of her captive's legs off the mat before tucking them under her armpits. Glaring into Katie pale, sweat-dappled face, Kaley sneered, "Hope you enjoyed your title reign chump. Because once Lacey and I have those belts, you aren't EVER getting them back!" She tucked Katie's ankles up under her armpits and then began to spin. For the first few revolutions, the tall brunette's shoulders dragging and bounced on the mat but as Kaley’s spinning picked up speed, physics began to exert its inexorable force and she began to lift several inches off the canvas, her body held totally prone in Kaley's classic application of the Giant Swing.

Continuing her nauseating spin, Kaley knew she couldn't keep this up for much longer so she looked for the coup de grace. Picking up speed for a final turn, she stopped suddenly and flipped Katie over onto her belly. In the same motion, Kaley sat down hard, trapping her wounded rival in a spine-wrenching Boston Crab in the middle of the ring. With the Crab locked in perfectly, Kaley leaned back as far as she dared, putting insidious pressure on Katie's lower back and legs. Roaring in victory, Kaley lifted up and then slammed her butt down repeatedly into Katie's back, all the while demanding that the official check the brunette for her surrender.

Lifting her face to the lights, Kaley put everything she had into the hold and screamed, "GIVE UP KATIE!"

Shaking her head 'no', Katie refused to acknowledge the concept of submitting to Kaley. Realizing that the ropes were too far away to help, Katie settled on the only option left to her. Putting both hands flat against the mat, Katie waited against the mat, lying as flat as she possibly could. The next time Kaley roes up, Katie pushed up with her and snapped her legs out fast, flipping Kaley off her perch and dumping the surprised blonde in an awkward heap on the canvas. Ignoring the rather undignified nature of her counter, Katie got to her hands and knees and started crawling her way towards Sarah Michelle's outstretched hand. She'd made it to within five feet of her frantically straining partner when Kaley grabbed a handful of her tights and yanked her back to the center of the ring.

Angry that Katie had almost escaped her, Kaley took out her frustration by driving the point of her knee down between Katie's shoulders. With the brunette once again flattened out on the mat at her feet, Kaley felt more in control of the situation and let her opponent know it. "You can't leave just yet Katie! There's a move I've been dying to show you and now is the perfect time. It's my take on your finisher, though if I can be honest, I think my version is a little better. But I'm biased, so judge for yourself." Hoisting Katie to her feet, Kaley scooped the dazed girl onto her shoulder so that the point of her right shoulder was resting snugly against Katie's belly. Wrapping her arms tightly around the brunette's middle, Kaley sauntered around the friendlier half of the ring, letting everyone see her victim's helplessness. Tightening her grip, Kaley muttered, "That was the set-up, here comes the follow through."

Then Kaley ceased her taunting and leapt into the air. Tucking both knees under her, she landed easily on the canvas while Katie's stomach was driven wickedly into Kaley's shoulder in a move that really was best described as something of an Inverted Holmes Wrecker. Loving the feel of Katie's gut molded against her shoulder, Kaley tossed the gasping vixen to the canvas and proceeded to throw herself across Katie's chest. Hooking the far leg, Kaley leaned forward into the pin and waited for the ref to end the match. Seeing the cover made, the ref swooped in and counted off, 'ONE... TWO...' Katie shot a shoulder off the mat, breaking the count.

Annoyed at the champion's tenacity, Kaley got to her feet and hauled Katie to hers. Holding Katie weak-kneed in front of her, Kaley released her grip on the brunette's roots and quickly wrapped both arms around Katie' trim waist. Locking her hands against the small of Katie's back, Kaley poured pressure into the Bear Hug, forcing the brunette to wail and writhe in her grip. Laughing nastily into the brunette's face, Kaley taunted, "Why don't you give it up cupcake? Otherwise I might squeeze all the tasty goodness out of yooo…

UUUNGGGH!' Kaley’s chiding commentary was cut off when Katie brought both arms up and slammed her palms directly against Kaley's ears. The blonde grimaced and tried to maintain the Bear Hug, despite the sudden ringing in her ears. She probably would have succeeded in this endeavor if Katie hadn't followed up the Head Clap by jamming her right knee directly into the juncture of Kaley's thighs. Katie' sadistic Low Blow shattered the last of Kaley's grip and the blonde challenger sank to her knees at Katie's feet.

Grinning beatifically, Katie brushed the hair out of her face and purred, "How's that feel cupcake? I bet you'd like another taste wouldn't ya?"

Letting her opponent indulge in seconds, Katie sank her talons into Kaley's hair and pulled them both to their feet. Without saying a word, Katie trapped Kaley in a grinding Front Face-Lock and just held the position for a moment. Ever so slowly, a chilling smile broke out across her face and she said, "Think about the future Alyson." Right after that not so cryptic statement, Katie dropped back and down with everything she had left, pinning Kaley's forehead to the canvas with a skull-shattering DDT.

Lying on the mat looking up into the light, Katie's smile returned for the first time in several minutes and after taking a few deep breaths, she pushed to her feet and headed for her corner. Tagging in Sarah Michelle with a tired slap on the shoulder, Katie mumbled, "She's all yours perky."

Paying minimal attention to her partner, Sarah Michelle took a position near the middle of the ring apron and fired back, "I was wondering when I'd get to hurt her again. What's with you hogging all the blondes, you trying to tell me something?"

Sarah Michelle grabbed the top rope in both hands and leaned back as far as gravity and her own balance would permit. After only a second's wait, Sarah Michelle jerked forward and leapt to the top rope. Balanced precariously on the tensely stretched cable for a single heartbeat, she launched forward in a higher and longer jump, at the apex of which she shot both legs out in front of her to prepare for her return to the canvas. Said landing came shortly thereafter and it was remarkably easy on her anatomy thanks to the fact that her right leg came down thigh-first directly across the back of the challenger's neck. The electric way in which Kaley’s body jackknifed off the canvas was a dead giveaway that Sarah Michelle's Springboard Leg Drop had been more than effective and Sarah Michelle didn't waste any time in pushing Kaley onto her back and hooking the far leg. Leaning all her weight into the pin, nodded in time with the official's count only to have Kaley buck her off shortly after the 'TWO' had been reached.

Refusing to allow the larger blonde anything like breathing room, Sarah Michelle grabbed Kaley and Hair Hauled the challenger to her feet. Releasing her grip on Kaley's hair, the Slayer hammered her opponent's abs with a rapid fire trio of jabs 'PIK PAK PEK!' that sounded especially loud in the small confines of the arena. While Kaley was nursing her impaled gut, Sarah Michelle ran the ropes beside her woozy foe and charged back, picking up a good head off steam.

When there was less than a foot of space separating the two beauties, Sarah Michelle clasped her hands under the taller beauty's chin and clamped down tight. Still moving at a great rate of speed, Sarah Michelle shot her feet out in front of her and dropped to the mat on her back in a short, tight arc. Kaley was taken along for the ride with her head in the lead and she moaned loudly when the back of her shoulders and skull slammed into the canvas thanks to the Slayer's running application of the classic Swinging Neckbreaker.

Knowing that Kaley couldn't withstand a prolonged assault on her head for very long (especially not after Katie had started things with her DDT) Sarah Michelle scrambled to her feet and quickly lined up next to the challenger's head again. Looking down at the wreckage of the other blonde, Sarah Michelle ran a hand through her hair and said, "Let's find out if there's actually anything inside that pretty blonde head of yours."

Getting no response from Kaley, Sarah Michelle ran the ropes for the second time in as many minutes. Not long after she'd bounced off the cables, she did a graceful cartwheel that looked like any other - with the exception of the ending in which SMG turned her flip into a carefully planned freefall that ended with her right leg slamming down across Kaley's windpipe! The Cartwheel Leg Drop sent another shudder through Kaley’s body and Sarah Michelle could believe the bigger girl had just given up the fight. Hoping to prove herself correct, Sarah Michelle threw herself across Kaley's chest, hooked the far leg and looked up pleased with herself as the ref swooped in and counted.

'ONE... TWO...' but Kaley shot an arm off the mat, breaking the count.

Shaking her head in exasperation, Sarah Michelle taunted, "You really are too dumb to know when to stay down aren't you? Don't worry, by the time Katie and I get done with you, that's not going to be an issue for you any more."

Scrambling to her feet, the Slayer pulled Kaley to hers with a hearty handful of black vinyl tights and took hold of her victim's wrist. Pointing Kaley towards a neutral corner, Sarah Michelle whipped her into the buckles and followed her in; crushing Kaley against the steel post with a Double Knee Lift to the chest less than a second after the challenger had come to a stop. Holding a spaghetti-legged Kaley against the corner with one hand, Sarah Michelle taunted, "You keep giving me your head and I keep kicking it back to you. You really should see someone about this self-destructive streak. It can't be healthy."

The blonde champion deftly switched places with her opponent, taking a seated position on the top turnbuckle with Kaley slumped in front of her facing the ring. Yanking Kaley's head back with a handful of hair, the Slayer wedged Kaley’s chin into her armpit and cinched her up tight, securing the Inverted Facelock. Waiting just long enough to blow a taunting kiss towards a fuming Lacey, Sarah Michelle pushed out of the corner and pulled off a gorgeous 180-degree turn in midair and sat out, absolutely PLANTING the back of Kaley's skull against the mat with the Inverted Tornado DDT. Kaley was left starfished against the mat and while Sarah Michelle contemplated going for the pin, her high-impact offense had taken its toll on her reserves, so she decided a timely tag was an order. Dragging Kaley back to her corner, Sarah Michelle threw the challenger's legs aside and tagged in Katie.

Slipping onto the apron, Sarah Michelle told the brunette, "Leftovers."

Maintaining perfect deadpan, Katie replied, "Mystery meat; how appetizing.”

Getting into the ring, Katie grabbed Kaley by the wrist and pulled the injured girl to her feet. Linked to her opponent at the wrist, Katie took a half step back and then charged forward. Extending her left arm out straight, she caught Kaley across the mouth with an explosive Short-Arm Clothesline that took Kaley off her feet and put her on her back in a confused daze. Relishing the opportunity to pile on the punishment, Katie clamped down tighter on Kaley's wrist, keeping the two vixens linked by Katie's right arm. Ignoring the dull ache running through her shoulder, Katie glared down at Kaley for a moment and then pulled her back to a standing position.

Taking a few steps back, Katie steadied her aim for a moment before pulling Kaley towards her and lunging forward all in the same fluid motion. Katie's second Short Arm Clothesline was even stiffer than the first and because Katie was thoughtful enough to release Kaley's wrist before it connected, the blow nearly turned the blonde inside out, leaving her splayed out and face down on the canvas. Shaking off the almost painful tingle in her bicep, Katie walked over to Kaley's head and slowly bent down to pull the other girl to her feet.

Staring blandly into Kaley’s dazed face; Katie opened her mouth as if to speak and then thought better of it. Slipping around behind her victim, Katie went about the business of finishing the once powerful challenger off. Working on instinct alone, Katie snuggled in beside Kaley and hooked her up for a Back Drop Suplex. But as pedestrian as the beginnings to this move looked, Katie’s fans knew the brunette had something more impressive in mind. At the apex of her lift, she spun Kaley around so that her feet were now pointing towards the brunette. In the same motion Katie fell straight down, driving Kaley straight into the canvas with a move that was technically known as a Spin-Out Powerbomb and more frequently referred to as 'The Kill-Switch.' Predicting a three count in Kaley's immediate future, Katie pinned both of Kaley's wrists high over her head and simple held them in place as the ref dropped down to count, 'ONE... TWO... THR-NO!'

Fearing for her partner (and the belts, can't forget about them) Lacey stormed into the ring and booted Katie in the side of the head, breaking up the count. Groaning in equal parts pain, surprise and anger, Katie looked up just in time to see the referee shooing a furious Lacey back to her corner. Shaking her head slowly, Katie muttered, "Fucking pipsqueak!"

Returning her attention to Kaley, Katie sank her claws into the blonde's sweat soaked mane and started pulling her to her feet. She had just got Kaley to her knees when the challenger pulled a fist back and drove it forward, giving the cold brunette something warm to remember her by with a vicious Punch to the trunks. Katie's jaw dropped open and a shriek of agony poured out, but that was about all she COULD do at the moment. Normally, a blatant Low Blow would’ve been grounds for a DQ but the ref was still occupied with Lacey and didn't see the foul.

Gasping in both pleasure and pain, Kaley struggled to her feet and trapped the crippled brunette in a tight Front Facelock. Using her free hand to grab a hold of Katie's tights, pulling up hard and baring half the champ's cheeks with a hardhearted Wedgie. Turning in a drunken half circle, Kaley glared towards Sarah Michelle and snarled, "Next time this'll be you, bitch." She lifted Katie off her feet and held her aloft directly overhead and managed to hold her in that position for a good five seconds before her legs began to tremble and she simply sat out, driving the top of Katie's skull into the mat with a match ending Brain Buster.

Under optimal circumstances, Kaley would have gone for the pin right then and there, but despite the fact that she was in control of the situation now, she had spent the last several minutes on the end of a hellacious beating from the tag team champs and she had to get out of the ring before the last of her reserves failed her. So she grabbed Katie’s ankles and dragged her across the ring as fast as she could toward a red-lining Lacey. Finally getting within tagging distance, Kaley dropped Katie's legs and slapped the brunette's outstretched hand. "I thought you might want a shot at this dumb bitch."

Nodding savagely, Lacey snarled, "I want several."

Forgoing the traditional means of entrance to the ring, Lacey scrambled up to the top turnbuckle and crouched down, waiting impatiently for the bigger brunette to get to her feet. After several seconds of unheard taunting from Lacey, Katie did manage to get to her feet and turn towards her partner's corner. This would have been sound strategy 99% of the time, but it totally failed to take Lacey's presence into account. Lacey made her opponent pay for this lapse in judgment. As Katie started to stagger towards Sarah Michelle, Lacey straightened up and she sprang through the air, slamming both feet directly between Katie's shoulder blades. The Missile Dropkick took Katie off her feet and dropped her face-first onto the canvas in a drunken, battered sprawl. Hopping to her feet, Lacey treated the crowd to an enthusiastic roar and the Slayer to an unkind display of her middle fingers.

Stalking to just outside Sarah Michelle's reach, Lacey openly taunted the fuming blonde. "THAT’S how it gets done champ! I dare you to make that tag if you get the chance. I've been waiting a long time to make you look shabby in this ring."

Darting away as Sarah Michelle took a swing at her; Lacey returned her attention to Katie and hauled the woozy girl to her feet. Pointing Katie toward a neutral corner, Lacey grabbed the tall brunette by the wrist and whipped her into the thinly-padded steel. Smirking as Katie's whole body trembled upon impact, Lacey exploded forward in a sprint that ended with a long, low leap that sent her crashing chest-first into Katie's face. Snugging her arms around the back of Katie' head, Lacey stood with her feet on the bottom rope and pulled Katie's face down to allow the taller girl and up close and personal tour of her décolletage with a Jug Smother.

Biting her bottom lip in a coy smile as Katie tried to breathe in the smothering furnace of her breasts, Lacey cooed, "Breathe in...."

She held the makeshift Jug Smother until the ref reached 'FOUR' on his count, then she stepped away and let Katie stumble out of the corner. Katie had taken about five steps when Lacey laced both of her hands across the brunette's chin and leapt into the air, tucking both knees tightly against Katie's back Katie was hauled off balance and bent painfully over the brunette's well-placed knees. The Lung Blower connected perfectly and Lacey demonstrated her faith in the maneuver by immediately pouncing across Katie's chest and hooking the far leg. The ref knelt down and counted off, 'ONE... TWO...' Katie thrashed a shoulder off the mat, breaking the pin.

Aggravated, but not frustrated, Lacey chided, "You wanna have some more fun beanpole? All right, you got it. But I don't want to hear any crying when I give you another taste of the twins."

Sinking her hands into Katie's hair, Lacey pulled the taller girl to her feet only to immediately double her over with a boot to the gut. As Katie sucked wind, Lacey ran the ropes behind her and headed back towards her opponent with a full head of steam built up. As she neared the point of no return, Lacey left her feet in a high, soaring Front Flip that let her pass directly over Katie's prone form. As she sailed by the champ's head, Lacey shot her hands out and grabbed hold of the slender brunette's hair. In the next instant, Lacey fell back to the mat and pulled Katie along for the ride, driving the taller beauty's face directly into the mat with her ingeniously applied variant on the Facebuster.

Sitting on her haunches, Lacey was thinking about going for the pin again when she realized that Katie was already getting to her feet. More than a little thrown by the champion's wherewithal, Lacey scrambled back to her vertical base and doubled Katie up with another boot to the gut. Taking a moment to decide on her next move, Lacey panted, "Apparently you think that if you keep getting up, I'll get tired of knocking you down. Unfortunately, that couldn't be further from the truth."

With Katie bent prone, Lacey ran the ropes to the blonde's right and sped back toward her foe. Reaching the injured champ, Lacey placed one hand on the back of Katie's skull and the other under her chin, before doing a front flip and landing back first on the canvas with Katie's head still in her grasp. The Flipping Neckbreaker connected beautifully as evidenced by the way the maneuver slammed Katie's head off the canvas and left her splayed helplessly in the middle of the ring.

Bounding to her feet, Lacey released a primal cry of triumph and slashed her thumb across her throat. Apparently she was going to try and end things right now. Pulling Katie to her feet, Lacey dragged the battered girl towards the nearest neutral corner and then treated her to a boot right above the line of her gray briefs. When Katie doubled over in agony, Lacey maneuvered in front of Katie with her back to the blonde. Reaching back over her shoulder, she grabbed Katie by the head and pulled her close, then tucked Katie's chin against her shoulder to complete the Three Quarter Face Lock (a Headlock applied to only the top of Katie's head).

Her face lit up in wide, smirking smile, Lacey sprinted toward the corner with Katie in tow. As she neared the buckles, Lacey never slowed, running UP the turnbuckles holding onto Katie's head. As she cleared the top buckle, Lacey moved to swing herself around and fall butt first to the canvas, a wickedly potent version of the old ECW staple 'The Acid Drop', but her plans were rudely interrupted when Katie got her hands around Lacey's waist and continued to turn in a circle only to end it by dropping the curvy brunette on the top rope, Crotching her.

Lacey’s face changed from smug confidence to horrified shock as the taut cable sawed into her most sensitive of regions. And her terror only grew when she looked up and realized that Katie had stuck her on the side of the ring closest to a lurking Sarah Michelle. Lacey tried to wriggle off the ropes but she was still in place when Katie limped passed her and clapped hands with an impatient Slayer. With an evil gleam in her eye, the blonde sprang onto the top turnbuckle in one feline leap and faced toward Lacey. Then Sarah Michelle exploded off the top rope and pistoned out her left foot, catching Lacey square across the jaw with a Thrust Kick from several feet in the air.

The diminutive brunette let out an anguished groan and was finally knocked free of her painful perch only to tumble bonelessly into the ring like a puppet with the strings cut, right into the clutches of a waiting Slayer. Pleased to be back in the thick of things again, Sarah Michelle stalked over to her wounded adversary, leaned down and grabbed a double handful of Lacey's sweaty locks. Digging her nails in, Sarah Michelle pulled the challenger to her knees and bent her head back at an awkward angle. Glaring coldly down into Lacey’s flushed face; Sarah Michelle took a moment to congratulate herself on the panicky confusion she saw in the brunette's eyes.

Jerking Lacey's head from side to side, Sarah Michelle demanded, "You were going to make ME look shabby? Lacey baby, you are about to have that world view DRASTICALLY altered." Watching closely as the kneeling challenger started her response; Sarah Michelle cut her off by releasing one half of her grip and snaking the arm across the brunette's neck. Hold almost complete, Sarah Michelle released the other hand holding Lacey's hair and looped it under her arm and locked her hands. With Lacey's chin resting snugly in the crook of her armpit, Sarah Michelle snarled, "I've made better than you tap out to this Lacey, so just give up fast and I won't break your neck."

Threat delivered, Sarah Michelle dropped to one knee and pulled back with all her might, bending Lacey's head and torso backwards with a potentially crippling Dragon Sleeper. Keeping her hands locked tight against Lacey’s side, Sarah Michelle grinned savagely as Lacey started to writhe and scream in her grasp. Trapped helpless in the agonizing submission, Lacey reached forward with one free hand, blindly seeking the sanctuary of the ropes, but her instincts proved correct when they told her Sarah Michelle must have applied the hold in the center of the ring, meaning that forcing a break with the ropes would be almost impossible.

Flipping the hair out of her eyes, Sarah Michelle licked her lips and asked, "What's the matter Lacey, this too much pain for you? You want me to try something else? All right, since you begged me so nicely."

Getting to her feet with Lacey still squirming in her grasp, Sarah Michelle rose up on her toes and then sat out hard; treating the brunette to a more traditional application of the Inverted DDT than the version she'd planted Kaley with several minutes before. Sarah Michelle finally relinquished her grip on Lacey's head after the DDT connected, but she didn't go for the cover; Sarah Michelle wasn't normally a vindictive fighter, but she'd watched the challengers blindside and then try to dismantle her partner over the course of this fight, so she figured some payback was due. Hopping to her feet, Sarah Michelle grabbed Lacey's right ankle in both hands and pulled her leg off the mat.

Looking down into Lacey's face, Sarah Michelle taunted, "I'm still waiting for you to come up with something a little more offensively minded than the 'whimpering sob' Lacey. So if you won't fight back on your own, I guess I'll just have to motivate you."

Tucking Lacey’s ankle under her armpit, Sarah Michelle wrapped her arms around her thigh and lifted, turning her over and then sitting down to apply a Single Leg Boston Crab. The Slayer had been in this position for less than five seconds when she let Lacey's leg fall from her hands. In the same move, she shifted her position so that she was laying on the brunette's back facing her head, while at the same time scissoring her legs together, keeping Lacey's right leg bent and trapped between her thighs. To complete her hold, she looped her left arm under Lacey’s chin and locked her hands together. With the STF in place, Sarah Michelle pulled back as far as gravity would allow, now putting pressure not only on Lacey's knee and back, but her neck as well.

Feeling the challenger squirm helplessly in the STF, Sarah Michelle whispered quietly to the captured brunette. "Come on Lacey, fight out of this. If you don't, Kaley's gonna watch you screw up the best and probably only chance you had at the gold. So put some fight into this otherwise I might get pissed off and just snap you in as many places as I can!"

Being tortured both mentally and physically by the Slayer, Lacey was doing her best to stave off thoughts of submission. Reaching her hands out in front of her, Lacey clawed the mat desperately and croaked, "LET ME GO!"

Frantically shoving aside all thoughts not involving her escape from the STF, Lacey poured everything she had left into dragging her way across the mat towards the sanctuary of the ropes. The going was painful and much slower than she would have liked, but after several seconds, the cables were in sight and she reached for them the way a drowning person seeks a lifeline. Her grasping fingers had just brushed the bottom rope when Sarah Michelle released the hold and got to her feet.

Scrambling back to Lacey's ankles, Sarah Michelle grabbed the brunette by both feet and tugged her back into the middle of the ring. Setting herself in a tense, expectant crouch behind her foe, Sarah Michelle begged the challenger to get to her feet so she could end this fight properly. Seconds later, Lacey did just that and when she staggered around to kind her opponent, Sarah Michelle backed up a half step and shot her right leg up and out, cracking the sole of her boot against the point of Lacey's chin with a wicked Super Kick.

Lacey’s head snapped back and her eyes glazed over, but before she could collapse in a beaten pile, Sarah Michelle grabbed her by the sides of her head and doubled her over. In the blink of an eye, Sarah Michelle had Lacey doubled over and trapped in a Standing Headscissors.

Noting that she was facing the challenger's corner, Sarah Michelle shot Kaley a murderous glance and said coldly, "Take solace in knowing that this isn't you."

Ignoring Kaley’s snarled response, Sarah Michelle reached down Lacey's back, got a good double handful of her vinyl bottom and yanked up high, baring three quarters of the brunette's butt with a sadistic Wedgie. Even as the crowd roared their approval, Sarah Michelle shifted her grip to wrap both arms around Lacey's middle. Clasping her hands tightly, the Slayer pulled Lacey off her feet and held her up for just a second before completing the three revolutions and sitting out, nearly driving the challenger through the canvas with her Spiral Bomb finisher. Holding the wreckage of Lacey down on the mat, Sarah Michelle nodded with the ref’s hand as the fans counted, 'ONE... TWO...'

Then the lights went out all over the building! In the dark, Sarah Michelle heard a metallic CLANG somewhere close by, followed by the dull THUMP of someone hitting the mat. Keeping her wits about her, Sarah Michelle moved to release her hold on Lacey when the lights came back full force blinding her momentarily. When the haze cleared, she saw a familiar figure standing over her.

Brandishing a steel folding chair, Alyson Hannigan smiled at her old friend and purred, "Hello Sarah!" She tried to get out of the way, but Alyson swung too fast and the Slayer just barely managed to get her arms up before the chair hit the crown of her skull with a vicious BWANG!

Seeing her nemesis trying to cripple her partner, Katie tore through the ropes and snarled, "Big mistake little red riding whore." Alyson looked up in time to see the brunette coming, but not in time to stop Katie from catching her around the waist with a Spear that sent both women through the ropes and out of the ring to the floor below.

Watching the action unfold from her corner of the ring, Kaley knew an opportunity when she saw one. Scrambling through the ropes, she sprinted across the ring on a diagonal and looked over the side of the ring where Alyson and Katie had disappeared. Much to the blonde's relief, Katie and Hannigan were completely preoccupied with one another and not what was going on inside the squared circle. Leaving the battling rivals to their war, Kaley spun around on her heel and made a beeline for the downed Slayer.

Bending down, she buried her hands in the smaller blonde's hair and pulled her to her feet. Positioning herself behind and slightly to the Slayer's right, Kaley forced Sarah Michelle to bend over double, then keeping a hand planted on the back of Sarah Michelle's neck, Kaley told her, "I don't care if you believe me or not Sarah, but Lacey and I did NOT know this was coming. We wanted to beat the two of you without help, but you've gotta pick your spots and this was too good to pass on. We'll give you a rematch, though, don't worry. And next time, I'M gonna be the one who pins your skinny ass."

She looped her left arm around the back or Sarah Michelle's neck and threaded her right arm between her legs; locked her hands against the Slayer's middle, trapping her in a sort of Standing Cradle. Forcing the woozy blonde to balance on one foot, Kaley bent in a deep crouch before surging straight up with Sarah Michelle. At the apex of her lift, Kaley flung herself backward to the mat, dropping Sarah Michelle on the back of her head and shoulders - a move she'd started to call the Kalumniator.

Releasing her grip on the cradle, Kaley watched Sarah Michelle flop over onto her back with nothing more than a small groan. Visibly trembling with excitement, Kaley scrambled over to Lacey and hoisted the brunette to her feet. Shaking her partner by the shoulders, Kaley urged, "Wake up Lacey! Wake the fuck up!"

Lacey opened her eyes and groaned, "Wha…why ya yelling at me?"

Indicating the prone forms of Sarah Michelle and the ref, Kaley explained, "Because you're the legal woman and it's time to drop a fuckin' A-Bomb on this bitch!

Lacey's eyes lit up. "Hold her in place!" she told her partner.

Kaley only nodded as Lacey spun on her heel and sprinted for the nearest corner. Kneeling by Sarah Michelle's head, Kaley grabbed the blonde's wrists and pulled the high over her head, making sure there was no way she'd roll clear of Lacey's finisher. Looking towards the corner, Kaley say Lacey on the top buckle and screamed, "DO IT NOW!"

Lacey didn't need to be told twice and she leapt out into the void in a beautiful arc that ended with her landing ass-first on Sarah Michelle's exposed chest. The flattened Slayer convulsed once and then lay still but Lacey took no chances. She leaned back, hooked the beaten blonde's legs and leaned forward in an inescapable Matchbook Pin. Glancing towards the ref, Lacey begged Kaley, "Wake him up! And for God's sake keep Katie off me!"

Kaley hurried over to the ref, pulled the groaning zebra to his hands and knees before depositing him directly in front of Lacey. Smacking the poor dope in the back of the head, Kaley screamed, "COUNT!"

The haze in his head cleared just enough for the ref to see the cover and he slapped the mat 'ONE...'

On the outside of the ring, Katie heard the count start and she looked away from Alyson just long enough to see what was happening. Realizing she'd played into the redhead's hands, Katie spat, "Shit" and went to slide under the bottom rope only to have Alyson catch her around the waist and coo, "Where you going Katie? Am I keeping you from something important?"

Katie struggled furiously but she couldn't break free as the official completed the count, 'TWO... THREE!'

The bell rang and Katie's heart sank as she heard the announcer declare, "YOUR WINNERS BY PINFALL AND THE NEEEEEEEEEW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS, LACEY CHABERT AND KALEY CUOCO!"

In the ring, Kaley and Lacey got to their feet and paraded around the ring, holding the title belts overhead. But the new champs didn't stick around too long. With Katie and Alyson still upright, the ring was a dangerous place, so they slipped out of the squared circle and limped up the ramp, clapping and celebrating.

Seething, Katie reversed her momentum and drove an elbow into Alyson’s smirking face. Smiling evilly at the thin rill of blood run down Alyson's lower lip, Katie promised, "THAT’S going to cost you Alyson."

Licking the blood off her lip, Alyson fired back, "Just squaring old debts Katie my dear. Now where were we? Oh yes, I was about to gouge your eyes out!"

Alyson went into a crouch and was about to spring when the speakers spat a burst of static and fired up, ‘You Wouldn't Believe.’

Amidst the cheers of the crowd, Richard Fannin strolled through the curtain with microphone in hand. Waiting for the music to fade, the promoter turned his attention to Alyson and Katie and said, "Congratulations ladies, you seem to have made a habit out of interfering in one another's matches, not only at the expense of one another, but my poor referees too. Well, I've always hated screw-job endings, so I've decided I've going to kill this little problem before it can get much further. Therefore, before too much more time passes the two of you are going to face each other in a one-on-one match. No frills, no gimmicks, no crap; just a nasty, brutal fight. And to ensure that the two of you don't kill one another, I've decided to appoint a very special referee for the match, someone I'm convinced will call this fight down the middle, given the fact that she has absolutely NO REASON to hate either one of you." Fannin smiled then and both Katie and Alyson cringed, it was never a good thing when the promoter grinned like that.

Raising the mic back to his lips, the promoter began, "Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce..." his voice trailed off and for several seconds there was silence that was shattered when the speakers let loose with, 'Are You There'.

Rachel McAdams, clad in a ref's shirt and skintight black leather pants, pushed through the curtain and stood next to Fannin. Taking the microphone from the promoter, the Auburn Avenger turned her attention to the two women who had dragged her into their conflict and said, "Hello Katie, hello Alyson. I just wanted to come out her and tell you that I intend to make sure you both play by the rules when you have your match. Because if you don't... I will gladly punch your fucking teeth right down your throat." The pale redhead tossed the mic to Fannin and stood with her arms crossed.

Shaking her head in disgust, Alyson snarled, "She won't save you from me, Katie. I'll go right through that skank to get at you." Before Katie could get a word in, Alyson jumped over the barricade and disappeared into the crowd. Looking after the vanished redhead, Katie returned her attention the one still present.

Staring a hole through McAdams, Katie said, "I haven't forgotten about you Rachel. As soon as I put Alyson in the ground, I'll gladly plant you right beside her."

From her spot on the stage, Rachel shook her head 'no' before she too turned and vanished behind the curtain. Watching her leave, Fannin gave the audience a small nod and followed shortly thereafter.

Left alone at ringside, Katie slipped through the ropes and went to tend to Sarah Michelle, who was just starting to recover. Helping the battered blonde to her feet, Katie said, "Sorry about that; I got distracted by Alyson. I cost us the belts."

Sarah Michelle took a few shuddering breaths and replied, "Don't worry about it. All I want now is to see you kick the shit out of Hannigan. Just promise me one thing?"

"Name it," Katie said.

Hate burning in her eyes, Sarah Michelle whispered, "Save me a piece."

Katie's smile had all the icy charm of a straight razor, "No guarantees; but I'll try." With that said the tall brunette put an arm around her partner's shoulders and helped guide the Slayer out of the ring and back up the ramp.