Melanie Chisholm (Mel C aka Sporty) vs. Cat Deeley by Harry 08-Mar-00

In the aftermath of the 1999 Brit Awards, the press had been full of stories of the on going feud between Geri Haliwell and the remaining Spice Girls. This manifested itself the following day when Mel C and Geri Halliwell appeared as solo artists on an TV program. Mel was livid when she discovered that she, despite being a member of the award winning Spice Girls was treated as the second star. Geri got a longer slot, the chance to say some funny lines and was interviewed by the programs main presenter, Cat Deeley. Meanwhile Mel was relegated to a short slot either side of a commercial break, interviewed by some half-wit and no chance to sing. Her mood was not improved when Geri got the Star Dressing room and she was relegated to the room closest to the fire escape.

Mel finally snapped when, after the show, she saw Cat looking very smug with herself coming out of Geri's room. Her initial reaction was to confront Geri with these sleights, but she was afraid that she would get the same treatment that had been doled out to Emma. Instead she followed Cat into her dressing room. Cat was just about to change to go home when Sporty Spice entered unannounced.

"Listen her you toadying little bitch, its your doing that I wasn't treated like the star that I am!" snarled Mel.

"Sorry to disappoint you Mel, but the producers just didn't think you were star material. Maybe when you learn to sing without help from someone else you might even get a slot of your own."

"Maybe you and Geri are more than friends. After what Emma did to you maybe Geri's been giving you some one on one training." sneered Mel

"Shut up you skanky little trollop. Why don't you stick to being the ugly spice girl and piss off. I have better things to do on a Saturday afternoon than put you in you place."

"You and whose army?" Both women had now crossed the line and only physical confrontation would suffice. But Cat's dressing room in a busy London TV studio was not the place to settle matters and they both realised it.

"OK Mel lets see if you are half the woman you think you are. My place in 1 hour, just you and me, here's the address, so you can show the taxi driver."

Cat handed Mel a piece of paper, who left the room muttering insults. Cat then hastily packed her stuff and left the building without saying goodbye and grabbed a taxi home. She barely had time to think about her outfit and change before she heard the knock on the door. Sure enough, it was Mel. Cat eyed her visitor as if she were something very unpleasant you might see on the pavement.

"So you turned up, go straight through - look for the room marked Cat's butt kicking room!"

Mel just snorted derisively and walked through into the living room. The floor was covered in a thick white carpet and the furniture bore signs of having been hastily moved aside. Sporty threw her bag onto the sofa and turned to face Cat who had followed her. Cat knew of Mel's reputation for being physically fit, but figured that it was all reputation. The Spice Girl certainly played up to the image of being tough wearing a black T-shirt that showed off her arm tattoos, black combat trousers and a battered pair of trainers. Cat was more feminine in her appearance, as befitted a MTV VJ. She wore a figure hugging purple stretch cardigan, light blue pedal pushers and a pair of new trademarked trainers.

"So did you come to fight or just admire me?" asked Cat.

By now Mel just wanted to take out her frustrations for the perceived insults she had suffered. Sporty rushed forward, intent on getting to grips with Cat, who responded by using her hands to push and slap at the Spice Girl. But although she managed to land a couple of hits on her opponents face, Mel kept coming forward and Cat was forced to keep stepping backwards. Mel got past Cat's flailing hands and managed to reach out and grab the VJ's shoulder length sandy coloured hair.

Having grabbed her opponents hair, Sporty pulled her closer. Cat's initial reaction was to use her hands to keep the singer at arms length, but the pain in her scalp angered her, so she threw herself forward. As her body collided with Mel's, Cat sunk her hands into the Spice Girl's short highlighted hair. The two women tussled briefly in a mutual hair pulling struggle, their feet lashing out at one another. Bruises started to appear on the exposed skin of Cat's lower legs and she squealed in anguish. In retaliation she used her grip to pull Mel's head backwards exposing her neck.

"Disgusting little slut Mel, when did you last wash your hair?" sneered Cat.

Mel said nothing but instead moved a hand and started to sink her fingers into the side of Cat's face. Although this attack resulted in a squeal, because Sporty's nails were non existent, this was more an expression of surprise than pain. But when Mel's right foot again connected with Cat's already bruised shin, her leg gave way and she sunk to her knees breaking her hold on the singers hair. Mel relished this position of dominance, stood looking down on her opponent whom she had firmly by the hair. Whilst Cat reached back to rub her leg, Mel thrust forward her crotch and then dragged forward her opponents head.

Cat looked up in time to see the fly of Mel's combat trousers collide with her face. Her scream of shock and disgust was lost as her face was covered by the rough material. Mel enjoyed the sensation of having Cat in this position, so much so that her mind started to wander. She never felt Cat grab her ankles and pull hard until she felt herself falling to earth. As her butt hit the floor hard she let go of Cat's hair and fell onto her back. As she struggled to get up Cat threw herself forward and landed on top of Sporty, pushing her downwards.

Mel let out a pained gasp as the air was forced from her lungs, "Get off me you fat cow!" she managed to hiss.

Cat reached forward and grabbed the pop stars short hair and started to shake her head from side to side. Mel reacted by grabbing hold of the VJ's wrists to protect herself, but this brought no relief. As she felt a wave of nausea start to overtake her, Sporty transferred her hands to Cat's hair on either side of her head and started pulling. The sound of their struggle was punctuated by grunts of effort and squeals of pain. Cat started to press her fuller figure down on Mel, hoping to overwhelm her opponent. Sporty let out a screech of pain as she felt her breasts pushed back into her chest by her opponent.

Just as Miss Deeley thought that she had gained the upper hand, Mel managed to roll them both over so that it was now the Spice Girl who was on top. Before Cat could put her weight into continuing this rolling movement, Mel had managed to get her legs either side of her midriff, pinning her in place.

Cat redoubled her hair pulling, despite Mel's short spiky hair not offering the purchase that she wanted. But this was cut short when Mel started to press her knees into Cat's torso just beneath her breasts, which to Mel's ears generated a satisfying scream. She then released Cat's hair, a few strands stuck in her fingers, and started to unbutton the VJ's top. Cat also released her hair pulling grip and used her hands to bring some relief from the painful vice of Mel's knees In doing so he allowed her opponent to sit upright. But once Sporty's fingers started fumbling like an inexperienced lovers with the buttons of her top, she instead moved to protect herself.

"Now now Cat, your normally not bashful about flashing your body on TV. Are you frightened that I might show you up!" inquired Mel, her voice dripping with malice.

"Don't make me puke you lezzie slut!" gasped Cat through the pain.

Irritated that her sexuality had been questioned, Mel moved one of her hands and viciously slapped Cat across her right cheek. Cat moved her own hands to rub her reddening cheek, allowing Mel free reign to undo buttons.

Just as some cleavage would have come into view, had there been a witness to this struggle, Cat raised her body. She wrapped her arms round Mel's body and took two handfuls of the back of the black T-shirt. No longer able to easily deny Cat of her top, Sporty instead started to pull the VJ's face into her chest and then rubbing it back and forth. As Cat saw light, then darkness followed by light again repeatedly, she realised that not only was Mel a sweaty little cow, worse she was getting serious enjoyment from having her in this position.

This thought not only nauseated the VJ, but it steeled her determination not to succumb. She started to pull up Mel's T-shirt, revealing the pale white skin of her midriff. All of this Mel was oblivious to until Cat managed to drive a fist into her stomach. Sporty to let out a strangled gasp, come grunt, of pain and released her hold on the TV star.

As Cat fell backwards she pulled Mel's T-shirt up her body, dragging the singer downwards. In doing so the T-shirt started to come up over Mel's head pulling her arms as it did so. The two young women toppled over onto their sides, Cat continuing to be between Mel's legs and pulling on her top. Mel started to squirm and thrash in an effort to free herself. But in doing so she only aided Cat in denying her T-shirt.

With a final strong tug Cat pulled the sweat soaked article of clothing over Mel's head, revealing her pale upper body, tattoos and all, and her pert breasts behind a white sports bra. Now free to resume her attacks Mel reached out and grabbed Cat's already half open top. She pulled hard and there was a ripping sound, some buttons flew through the air revealing more of the MTV VJ's chest and a lacy black bra.

Cat discarded the T-shirt and got up onto her knees so that she was above Mel. But before she could launch an attack, Mel pulled again on her top removing the last few buttons so that the cardigan flapped open, and in the process bringing Cat down on top of her.

Cat placed both her hands over Mel's mouth intent on choking her opponent, whilst Mel used both hands to pull on the hair on the back of Cat's head, pulling it upwards. Despite the pain Cat pressed her hands downwards. She could feel Mel opening and closing her mouth gasping for oxygen and perhaps trying to bite her hand. Mel started to thrash wildly as she was starved of life supporting air, which only used up her limited supply.

Just as she started to feel faint, her thrashing paid off as she was able topple Cat. As Miss Deeley slide to her left she broke her hold allowing Mel to gulp down air and then follow up so that she was on top. Having resumed her position of dominance, Mel Chisholm wrapped her fingers round Cat's throat and repaid the choke attack.

Slightly stunned by this rapid turn of events it took Cat a few moments to realise that she was being choked. She reached up and took hold of Mel's hair and yanked the singers head violently backwards. But despite the grimace and shout of pain that this brought from Mel, it brought no relief to Cat. She then placed a hand under the Spice Girls chin and pushed hard to increase Mel's pain. This brought more sounds of pain, but still no relief. In retaliation, Mel raised her butt and slammed her crotch down into Cat's. As the sensation shot through Cat's body she let go of Sporty Spice.

As Mel prepared to repeat the attack, Cat thought she saw stars appear before her eyes. Realising that she had to break free if she was to survive, Cat reached round Mel's back and grabbed the waist of her combat trousers. Having suffered this sort of attack before, Mel broke her choke hold and rolled off Cat before her womanhood was assaulted. Cat let her go, grateful for the chance to breath properly again.

After an all to short break, Cat saw Mel get up onto her knees and move towards here, so she did the same. The two stars would have been incapable of appearing on TV, such was their state at that moment. Instead they lunged forward at one another and locked fingers trying to bend their opponents hand back. They tussled at long range, inconclusively, for a minute or so before breaking. Whilst Cat pondered what to do next, Mel lunged forward and took hold of either side of the open cardigan and pulled her opponent towards her. Instinctively Cat put out her ands to stop herself falling on her face, but in doing so she made herself vulnerable.

Mel wasn't slow to take advantage and lent forward placing one arm on Cat's shoulder blades so she couldn't get up. She then reached down underneath her opponent and sunk her fingers into Cat's right breast. Cat screamed in shock and pain as Mel's short grubby fingers sunk into tender flesh. Using one hand to keep herself steady, Cat drove her other hand, as a fist, upwards into Mel's womanhood. At that range she could not miss and Mel's combats offered no protection.

The first blow brought no immediate reaction, although Mel's face had turned white. The second blow driven upwards into the singers pubic mound brought a shrill scream and Mel fell backwards holding onto her crotch. Meanwhile Cat got up from having been on all fours and looked down to examine her breast, where she was pleased to see no real damage had been done. Satisfied, Cat looked up and saw Mel slowly crawling away from her on her back.

Cat started after her opponent, but Mel was not yet ready to resume the struggle and she started to lash out with her feet. Although not making contact, it had the desired affect of keeping Cat away from her. Mel continued to edge backwards with Cat staying just out of range. But in the confusion of the fight so far the Spice Girl had lost her bearings as she discovered when her head touched the sofa. As she started to try and get up, Cat leapt forward and grabbed Mel's trousers, and before she could be kicked, dragged the Spice Girl towards her.

With Mel laying in front of her, Cat reached down and put her hands over both breasts and started to squeeze.

"I'm surprised I can get a grip there is so little here!" Cat said conversationally.

This was no longer quite so much fun for Mel and she screamed in pain and arched her back. Her hatred for Geri was now overwhelmed by a hatred for Cat. Mel brought her right knee up violently into the base of Cat's spine. The VJ let out a cry of pain before falling forward, breaking her hold and her head narrowly missing the piece of furniture. Instead of now having her breasts tortured, Mel now found herself with Cat's breasts near enough in her face, but with no room to use her hands.

She reached down to the back of Cat's pedal pushers, pushed under the waist band and panties and sunk her fingers into the VJ's butt. Cat let out a howl of anguish and drove her crotch protectively into Mel's stomach, forcing air from the singers lungs. Whilst Cat squirmed in pain, Mel removed her hands and was able to roll her opponent so that she was on top.

Now that the tables were again turned Cat reached down and took hold of Mel's hair, pulling the singers head away from her chest as she did so. This enabled Mel to bring her hands up, under the open cardigan and take a firm grip on Cat's bra. Before her opponent could react, Mel had rudely shoved aside the lacy material and was pressing the breasts together, her finger and thumb clamped cruelly over the semi erect nipple.

Cat screamed in pain at this violation and let forth a stream of abuse that would not be suitable for her normal TV shows. But Mel's face was masked with a grimace of pain as Cat thrashed and squirmed in pain and had redoubled her hair pulling. Cat was going through agony and badly wanted to cry, so much so that she had no idea of how much pain Mel was feeling.

As a last desperate act she removed her right hand and then brought it up as a fist into the side of Mel's head. The relief, for Cat was almost instant as Mel was knocked clear of her and sent sprawling. Her automatic reaction was to massage her now visible breasts in a way that to the casual observer would have been sensual rather than practical. Meanwhile Mel felt as if she had been hit by a tank. One moment she was torturing the tart of a VJ, the next she was lying of the floor, looking up at the ceiling.

She heard Cat shout, "You dirty slut Mel, you're going to pay for this!", but wasn't sure where her opponent was.

Mel rolled over intent on crawling to a corner of the room. But when she raised her self up to move, she felt a weight descend on her, then hands fumbling with her bra strap. She then felt fingers cruelly gripping her hair and she was pulled upwards, her bra falling to the carpet in the process. She tried to struggle but there was little she could do. She managed to get hold of Cat's pedal pushers with one hand and cause a rip to appear, but this didn't stop the MTV VJ.

When Mel was on her knees, with Cat directly behind her, Cat stopped pulling on the singers hair, and instead used both hands to grab her now exposed breasts. Cat sunk her fingers cruelly into the tender flesh, impervious to the wails of pain coming from Mel. Although Cat didn't have long nails, her grip did cause bruises to appear. Mel brought her own hands up and tried to free herself, but Cat's grip was to tight. So instead she turned her body slightly and then drove an elbow back in the VJ's stomach. This caught Miss Deeley totally by surprise and she let go of Mel as she fell backwards clutching her stomach.

Mel was close to tears at the torture her body had been put through. She had always been made very aware that physically she wasn't in the same league as the other Spice Girls and she was very conscious of any damage that she suffered. Her self pitying thoughts as she gentle caressed her damaged globes was cut short when Cat firmly planted the sole of a trainer in the base of her spine.

Mel was propelled forward and landed heavily on her already aching breasts. As her scream of pain stopped she got up onto her hands and knees intent on crawling away, when Cat launched another kick, this time landing squarely on the singers butt, again sending her sprawling forward. As the carpet again bit into her sore breasts Mel wailed in pain.

But rather than suffer more of the same, Mel rolled over onto her back to look up at her advancing opponent. As she did so Mel say something purple fly through the air at her face. she put up her hand to protect herself, but realised to late it was Cat's cardigan. In that instant Cat was on top of Mel, one hand holding the discarded cardigan over her face and the other pulling at her hair. Sporty reached up and plunged her hands into Cat's hair. The two women shrieked in pain, Mel's obscured by the positioning of the cardigan, as their already battered breasts pressed into one another. Mel raked the soles of her trainers across the exposed skin on Cat's lower legs causing unpleasant weals to appear.

Mel pulled the cardigan away from her mouth, ripping it in two as she did so, but at the same time allowing Cat to move her body up so that her legs were astride her opponent, although she was effectively astride the Spice Girl. Fearing Mel's reputation she moved one hand and used it to turn Mel's face to push it into the carpet.

Mel struggled to break free and used one hand to try and reach into Cat's leg wear. But as her fumbled to gain entry, Cat slammed her crotch into Mel's, cutting off the route of attack and trapping the hand between their bodies. All it could be used for now was to pinch, and this had little was nothing as to the pain that Cat was inflicting when she started to hammer Mel's face into the carpet. On the third such blow Mel screamed her surrender. After another couple of blows Cat released her hold and sat triumphantly above the beaten Spice Girl who had now burst into tears. When Mel refused to shut up as Cat instructed, Cat got up and picked up the sweaty black T-shirt that Mel had been wearing. She smothered Mel until she was quiet.