BEYONCE VS ALICIA KEYS
Guest Staring Tyra Banks in STRANGE RELATIONSHIPS
NOTE - This story takes place 11 months after the STONE RAGE HALLOWEEN BASH!
"Friendships come in many different forms." Tyra says looking into the camera, while holding a microphone for a special documentary. "Today I'm examining the relationship between two of the most talented, gorgeous and intelligent women in entertainment today, Alicia Keys and Beyonce."
"Beyonce and Alicia first met when they were both 14 years old. Both of their first nationally distributed songs were on the Men in Black soundtrack. From that time they became friends and professional competitors." Tyra explains.
"Trying to explain their relationship from there is complicated." Tyra continues. "Uh remember the Larry Bird & Magic Johnson rivalry in the 80's? Now they are the closest of friends, but even now if you roll a basketball out between them, they turn into mortal enemies. Even though they love each other like brothers, they'll stop at nothing to beat and humiliate the other. It's insane!" Tyra says with a puzzled look. "Both admit they hated the other while they were playing, but they always talked about each other with the utmost respect and admiration."
"Alicia says that Beyonce inspires her to put on her best show possible. That may be true, but she also inspires an envy and jealously that we never see in Alicia." Tyra examines. "Beyonce is always highly competitive with her Sasha Fierce alter ego, but even she gets more ruthless when facing Alicia. Yet once the competition is over, they go back to being great friends, and love and admire each other. Let's examine this strange relationship when they both appeared as guest on my show."
"So Alicia and Beyonce, the last time we saw you two together at the STONE RAGE HALLOWEEN BASH!, you were at each other's throats." Tyra Banks begins as she, Beyonce and Alica sit together on The Tyra Bank's Show set for an interview. "How is your relationship now?" Tyra asks.
"Well B?" Alicia says looking at Beyonce with a playful smile.
"What's up A?" Beyonce responds with the same smile. "The same as it always has been Tyra, just fine..." Beyonce then answers.
"Yeah like I've said numerous times," Alicia jumps in. "Beyonce and I have been friends for years. We've been close friends and we've competed against each other hundreds of times over the years. We're both very, very, very competitive people. So when we compete against each other, people think we hate each other, but nothing can be farther from the truth. I love B. I think she's wonderful. It's an honor, a challenge, and fun to compete against her in anything." Alicia explains.
"Yeah, because we are such good friends it allows us to really cut lose on each other without any hard feelings." Beyonce takes over. "I love Alicia. She brings out the very best in me. It is really an honor to compete with her and to be her friend."
Alicia chuckles and says, "Yeah I know how to handle B when she goes all Sasha Fierce."
"Yeah." Beyonce starts giggling. "I was in full Sasha Fierce mode that night. It was Halloween, I was in costume, and it was my first title defense. I don't know what I was thinking...."
"I know what you were thinking." Alicia thinks to herself as Beyonce continues talking to Tyra. "You were jealous that Jay Z came home and told you that he was doing a song with me on his next CD. You didn't like me and him being in the studio alone for hours. The fact that we're going to be rehearsing for performances together and on the road together bothers you. That's why you brought up that shit with me and Swiss Beats and his wife Mashonda. I don't want your man!" Although Beyonce being so insecure about her man with her was very flattering. Beyonce, the idol on millions, the diva of all divas, the greatest diva of her time. The woman who is idolized by the likes of Miley Cyrus and Rihanna. The woman that the likes of Tyra Banks, Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian have said, "I had to channel my inner Beyonce" with Beyonce being synonymous with composure, elegance, and class. That woman was jealous and insecure about her man being around her. Alicia smiles harder.
"But on the real A." Beyonce says, breaking from her conversation with Tyra, and interrupting Alicia's thoughts. "I know you were serious when you said you wanted a match with me, but you're too nice to push for it. I know you'd love to slap me around!" Beyonce adds with a chuckle.
"No I don't want to smack you, but I would like the challenge of wrestling you since you are the champion. Just to see if I'm able to compete with the best." Alicia explains.
"Okay.. Right..." Beyonce answers with a sly grin like she is not really buying that answer. "Well I'm over due for a title defense. I've talked to Stone Rage and the booking committee, and they've authorized a title match between me and you today, right here on The Tyra Banks Show." Beyonce waits as the studio audience applauds loudly.
Alicia smiles with modesty as the studio audience encourages her to take the challenge. She knows that she has been out maneuvered by Beyonce. Beyonce is obviously prepared while she is not. However, title opportunities are so rare in this league, that Alicia has no choice but to accept it. Besides, it really would be fun to slap Beyonce around some. It does get very tiresome and loathsome hearing males and young girls gush about Beyonce constantly being such a goddess without peers, when Alicia considers herself her friend's peer in many ways. It is not Beyonce's fault, although it does build some resentment to her friend. "Sure, I'll do it." Alicia says almost reluctantly, trying to sell the audience that she does not relish the opportunity to take the Mighty Beyonce down. She does not dislike Beyonce, she admires her, she loves the challenge, it inspires her, it drives her to conquer her friend.
Beyonce smiles and says, "Great!" as she reaches over and gives her friend a hug. She is thrilled that Alicia took her challenge, for many of the same reasons that Alicia is thrilled to get her into the ring. Its no accident that Beyonce is considered the greatest diva of her time. That is one of her goals on the way to being one of the greatest divas of all time. Alicia does not have to prove that she is a peer to her. Beyonce knows that Alicia is her peer or superior in beauty, music and everything else. Like a Tiger Woods, Michael Jordan or Lance Armstrong, that does not scare her, it excites and thrills her. She does not dislike Alicia, she admires her, she loves the challenge, it inspires her, it drives her to conquer her friend.
"Wow I can't believe we're going to have that historic match after these messages." Tyra says as the television screen fades to black, before enlightening immediately again with a series of commercials.
When the show returns, Beyonce, stands in a wrestling ring wearing a shimmering gold one piece wrestling outfit. The gold illuminates her already radiant cafe au lait toned skin. She is standing on strong muscular legs that rival Tina Turner's. They support Beyonce's legendary, bootylicous body as she stands as still as a statue with her hands on her hips as she glares across the ring.
Beyonce stares across the ring at her foe, but does not see her friend Alicia Keys. Instead she sees a deceitful demon that hides behind an innocent smile. She sees a phony whore that so richly deserves the Hellacious beating that she is about to rain down on her. Beyonce sees a fake bitch that preaches that she is all about her music, like she does not hunger or treasure that her bookshelf is so full of Grammy awards that it is about to collapse. A phony that says that she is all about her fans, like she does not crave being on stage rocking the crowd for the sole and selfish satisfaction of hearing hundreds of thousands scream and call her name. Beyonce's hands fall from her hips, and her hands tighten into fist. Those fist anticipate clobbering a lying tramp that the media calls 'beautiful', 'classy' and 'lovely', although she wears the same low cut and slutty dresses that they slam others and label them as sluts for sporting. "Today is this fake, phony whore's day of reckoning." Beyonce thinks. "Everybody treats her like she's an angel, but she's no angel. I know her. Today I'll expose this demoness with the sweet smile as the devil that I know she is."
Alicia is in her corner in a white one piece swimsuit. Alicia slowly loses her smile, and gets serious. She looks across the ring at the big pig that she is about to roast. It's a fat pig too and Alicia can not wait to get her hands on it and make it squeal. "So this is the Great Beyonce!" Alicia thinks. "I'm not impressed. She looks like just another big lipped bitch to me. I outta make her kiss my ass after I have her begging for mercy. No that wouldn't be right, but it would be fun!" another smile creeps on her face. "I can't wait to pluck every feather off of this turkey's fat ass." Alica takes a hard swallow and examines her foe even closer. "She's not that special. She's all style and no substance. She's pretty, but I'm just as pretty or prettier. Her ass is big, but mine is just as big. She's a great performer, but I KNOW I'm better. So why do I always get second billing to her? I'm sick and tired of it! It ends today when I strap her championship belt around my waist. To be the best I have to beat the best! Damned! It's going to be so sweet kicking her snooty ass, and taking her down!"
"Alicia, are you ready?" Tyra Banks asks, standing in a one piece swimsuit of her own. Only her's is black on the bottom, and black and white stripes on the top. Her dress and presence in the ring obviously indicate that she is the referee for this championship bout. "Beyonce, are you ready?" Tyra asks. "Let's wrestle!" Tyra finishes and points to a stage hand to ring the bell to open the match.
When the bell rings, both competitors slowly stalk toward each other, and meet in the center of the ring. Both beautiful babes lock up collar and elbow. Beyonce thought that she would bowl Alicia over backwards, like she does most of her opponents, but quickly found that not to be the case. Beyonce had to plant her foot farther behind her to keep Alicia from overpowering her, and knocking her over. After battling to a stalemate, both separate for a moment.
Both girls back up a step and look at each other intensely. Just from this initial encounter, they have discovered that this bout will be tougher than expected. Both wear intense expressions as they are about to lock up again. As they get close, Alicia flashes a swift kick into Beyonce's stomach. The kick surprises Beyonce, and has her doubled over and backing up. Beyonce looks up in time to get clobbered by a wild haymaker to the face, Beyonce reels back against the ropes. Alicia stays on her, and whips her stunned buddy across the ring. Beyonce rebounds off the ropes on the opposite side of the ring and sees Alicia bent over waiting to execute a backdrop on the champion. Beyonce has enough control to stop and send a kick to the doubled over beauty's face. Alicia sees the foot coming her way out of the corner of her eyes and immediately stands, to narrowly avoid the kick. Alicia immediately goes for another walloping punch, hoping to catch Beyonce unawares, but the champion side steps the blow, allowing Alicia to sail past her. Once she does, Beyonce grabs Alicia by the back of her outfit and hair and roughly slings Alicia to the mat.
Alicia springs back up but Beyonce is there waiting and seizes two full handfuls of hair and viciously slings Alicia onto her back. The native New Yorker lands hard on her back with her feet straight up in the air. Alicia is a little dazed from being slung around like a rag doll, is getting up much slower. Beyonce runs over and seizes Alicia's hair when she is bent over, trying to rise and slings her over savagely to the canvas a third time. Tyra is shocked. She thought officiating this match would be a piece of cake, but Beyonce is attacking Alicia like she is a hated enemy instead of an old friend. After the last vicious hair throw, Tyra finds the voice to shout out, "Hey B! Watch the hair pulling! Don't make me tell you again!"
Beyonce shoots her friend Tyra an evil look, before roaring back. "I ain't pulling no hair! The Asshole's got extensions!"
The studio fans found Beyonce's comment amusing. They did not care about a minor rule infraction, They just want to see a wild catfight. So far Beyonce and Alicia were not disappointing them. Tyra had forced Beyonce to back off a bit while Alicia rises back to her feet. Not to be deterred, Beyonce launches her self, and takes Alicia down with a flying body press. Alicia grunts hard, and is taken back to the canvas with Beyonce lying across her chest. Beyonce hooks the leg for a quick pin, but Alicia kicks out at the two count.
Both Beyonce and Alicia are making their way to their feet. Beyonce grabs another handful of hair and helps Alicia up fully. Alicia reaches out and grabs Beyonce's honey colored hair and pulls Beyonce close to her, till Beyonce's chin is against her forehead. Next Alicia drops to her knees, bringing Beyonce along with her. Alicia's jaw breaker maneuver is successful. A numbing jolt flashes through Beyonce's sexy body. She has the presence of mind of a champion, and quickly gets off the mat, and tries to get away from Alicia. However she is stunned and uncoordinated, and staggers into the ropes, still holding her jaw.
Alicia follows Beyonce and clobbers her with a straight right to the nose. Beyonce's head snaps back and her hair goes flying around her head from the ferocity of Alicia's blow. Tyra's eyes widen seeing the normally sweet as an angel Alicia really trying to take Beyonce's head off. She never believed that Alicia was capable of such aggression and viciousness as Alicia strikes Beyonce with a few more savage punches that have Beyonce's head bobbling on her shoulders. Alicia lands one more grand slam blow designed to send Beyonce's head into the upper deck seating. Tyra thinks its almost like a sibling rivalry between the two buddies.
Alicia whips Beyonce into the ropes across the ring. However, Beyonce reverses positions and whips Alicia instead. When Alicia rebounds off the ropes, Beyonce bends over and sends her rival hurdling in the air with an extremely high back drop. Alicia lands with a mighty thud and a howl. She arches her back, while holding the small of her back even as she rises to her feet. Beyonce greets Alicia with her own hard fists to Alicia's head. They are not as powerful as Alicia's but formidable in their own right. Beyonce pummels Alicia into the corner. Then Beyonce changes tactics and switches to a cracking chop across Alicia's chest. A loud smack of flesh smacking flesh sounds out as Beyonce takes advantage of Alicia's low cut outfit and jealously chops her drop dead gorgeous rival's tits three more times.
Beyonce whips Alicia across the ring into the opposite corner. When just as Beyonce had done earlier, she reverses the whip and sends Beyonce into the turnbuckles. The crafty champion recognized what was happening. Beyonce leaps onto the second turnbuckle instead of colliding into them. Beyonce knows Alicia is following her into the corner. Beyonce launches herself off the turnbuckle attempting a body splash. Alicia sees it comming. She drops down to the mat allowing Beyonce to sail over her head. The champion crashes and burns, belly flopping hard on the canvas with a loud "Oommmppt!"
Beyonce nearly has the air knocked out of her. She immediately pops up to her hands and knees, clutching her stomach with a pained expression on her face. Alicia strikes with a low drop kick and blasts Beyonce in her face. The audience "Ooohh's." and "Ahhh's!" Seeing Beyonce's head stretch on her shoulders like a kicked ball attached to a string. Beyonce collapses flat on the mat. Alicia springs to her feet and quickly stalks her prey. Alicia starts brutally stomping Beyonce on the back of her head.
Tyra shakes her head in disbelief. Just hours ago, backstage before the show, Beyonce and Alicia were the best of friends. She watched them treat each other with love and affection and displayed the utmost mutual respect to each other. Each lavished the other the other with honest heart felt compliments about the other's beauty, talent, and class. Now Alicia is dragging Beyonce across the canvas by her hair, with a viciousness that Alicia has never displayed in any phase of her life ever. Somehow Beyonce has turned the angel into a devil. Tyra has seen Beyonce or she should say, Beyonce's alter ego, Sasha Fierce, reach this level of brutality, but it is usually reserved for her most hated enemies. Not a woman that she was embracing tightly, saying, "I love you soooo much A!" just a couple of hours earlier.
Alica hair drags Beyonce around, and stops in the middle of the ring. She pulls Beyonce up to a seated position. The in a totally uncharacteristic move, Alicia claws Beyonce's face, and grabs her nose, trying to snatch it off her face. Beyonce screams as her visage is being savagely and illegally assaulted. "What's the matter Bitch?" Alicia yells, while ignoring Tyra's reprimands. "You ain't hot shit now?" Alicia finishes with one final rip of Beyonce's visage.
Next Alicia grabs two large handfuls of Beyonce's hair, and lifts the diva off the mat and in the air, before releasing Beyonce, allowing her to crash back down to the mat. Beyonce lands with a big boom on her ass. "That ain't your hair either bitch! You've got extensions too." Alicia spits in a vile tone that no one has ever heard from her before.
Beyonce flops back onto her back, looking up at Alicia while lying spread eagle on the mat. Beyonce almost smiles that she has revealed this fierce competitive side of Alicia's personality to the public. Alicia has long been defined by her heart tugging music, her angelic smile, sweet personality, and tireless philanthropy work. Those are her genuine qualities. However nobody sees the knit picking perfectionist behind the scenes that creates that music. Nobody thinks about the hard driving director that directs those incredible concerts. Somewhere there must be a shrewd shark of a business woman to create the wealth for her charity work.
Beyonce is just as angelic and sweet as Alicia, however there is a major difference. Beyonce does not hide her aggressive side, she exalts it. She has created her alter ego, Sasha Fierce. Everybody knows not to mess with Sasha Fierce. Sasha wants total control. She wants awards and accolades, and will crush anybody in her way. "Diva is the female version of a hustler." Beyonce proclaims. She has found a happy and healthy balance between Beyonce and Sasha Fierce.
Alicia sees the smirk on Beyonce's face, and gets even angrier. Alicia has just started to deal with her competitive side, after nearly having a nervous break down, trying to please everybody in her life. Now her nastier side creeps beneath the surface, threatening to break through like a hidden monster. Alicia's thoughts drift to when she and Beyonce were on tour together. The two vixens clashed repeatedly on tour. "You always have to be top billing bitch, but not today!" Alicia angrily growls and reached down and clasps her hand around Beyonce's throat. Alicia hauls Beyonce up to her feet, then lifts her in the air with one hand. "I'm tired of getting second billing to you!" Alicia says while suspending Beyonce above her head by a hand around her throat. Alicia remembers the anger and frustration about being cast as second banana to Beyonce while on tour, then choke slams the beauty to the mat.
Beyonce lands with a big boom. Her eyes flutter vacantly up at the lights. "Who's your Mama bitch!" Alicia snaps and turns and darts for the corner. Alicia climbs out of the ring and quickly scales the turnbuckle to the top. Alicia gets a glimpse of Beyonce prone on the mat, heaving air as she climbs. She steadies herself on top and prepares to leap off when she is shocked to discover Beyonce standing underneath her with a grip on her preparing to throw her off of her perch.
"I'm yo Mama Asshole!" Beyonce mutters as she flings Alicia off of the top turnbuckle. Beyonce launches Alicia over her head and sends her hurdling through the air. Alicia flies like a bird before a thunderous crash to the mat on her back over ten feet away. Alicia wore the pain from the crash clearly on her face. She had the breath knocked out of her, and her back is in agony. Alicia knew she was hurt, and in deep trouble. She rises uncoordinated to her feet, hoping to convince Beyonce that she was not the wounded prey that she is. There is no fooling a War Queen like Beyonce. She comes charging across the ring leaps through the air and grabs Alicia's hair as she passes by. Beyonce lands and bulldogs Alicia's gorgeous face into the canvas.
Alicia lies face down, pretty much done. Beyonce springs to her feet, bounding with energy and vigor. She hauls Alicia up to her knees, then Beyonce forces Alicia's head in between her chocolate thighs. Beyonce pauses for a moment as the audience stands and cheers, realizing what is coming next, the Beyonce Bomb, Beyonce's power bomb finisher. Beyonce hoists and tosses Alicia up for the power bomb, but she has something special for her good friend. At the height of the Beyonce Bomb, Beyonce extends her arms up to their full height, to get a little extra height and force behind Alicia's finish. The move turns into Beyonce's version of the WWE's Undertaker's Last Ride Power Bomb.
Alicia lies, splattered on the mat, while the audience roars. Beyonce grabs Alicia’s ankles, folds her foe's body up into a match book pin, then sits on Alicia's ankles securing the pin. Tyra drops to the canvas to make the three count. Alicia is beaten, and knows it, but struggles angrily to escape. She is angry because of the way Beyonce chose to pin her. The matchbook pin has her ass in the air with the camera recording an excellent 'crotch shot' of her, with sweet pussy barely covered by the thin one piece spandex outfit.
Tyra finishes the three count. Beyonce stays on top of Alicia, holding her down in the matchbook pin. Alicia keeps struggling to escape after the pin. Beyonce laughs tauntingly. "Stop fighting, you ain't going nowhere until yo Mama says so." the War Queen chides. Alicia stubbornly, vainly tries to kick out. She gets even more pissed at Tyra's cackling instead of calling for the break. Finally she realizes the only way out of this embarrassing position and stops fighting. Seeing Alicia relent, Beyonce quickly gets off of her and starts celebrating her victory.
Tyra grabs Beyonce by the arm, and raises it above her head excitedly announcing, "Your winner, and still War Queen Champion of the Battle Zone, the one and only, Fabulous Beyonce!!!!!!!!!"
The audience roars their approval. Beyonce bounces and celebrates around the ring, climbing onto the turnbuckles, to acknowledge and incite the crowd. Meanwhile, Tyra jumps around behind her like an overage, oversized cheerleader. Alicia looks on with her eyes blazing. She is genuinely pissed. She does not know if it was the humiliating match book pin, just losing in general, the audience's reaction for Beyonce, or Beyonce's confident, borderline arrogant approach to the contest, but she is hot. She does not like her present position on the mat and Beyonce celebrating. Three years ago, Alicia would not have done anything about these feelings, but not today. Alicia is again inspired by Beyonce, to get off this mat and take the spotlight from her friend. She desires the fan's adulation, and plan on taking it now. She will get no greater satisfaction than taking it away from Beyonce, a woman that she idolizes herself.
A few moments later Beyonce comes over to Alicia and helps her to her feet. "You alright A?" Beyonce asks with an angelic smile.
"I'm fine B" Alicia answers returning a smile just as sweet. "Great match. You were great. You deserve the win and that championship belt."
Beyonce's smile widens, happy to receive a compliment from a woman that she holds in the utmost respect, a person that she considers a role model. Beyonce gives Alicia a warm hug, "Sorry I had to whip you ass like that. I had to show everybody who is the boss" Beyonce laughs. "Remember that when you're on the road next week with my husband." Beyonce adds mostly joking, but a little serious.
"I don't want your man." Alicia answers. Then she hugs Beyonce closer and adds, whispering in her ear, "And if I did, there wouldn't be anything that you could do about it. You couldn't stop me any more than Mashonda did when I took her husband." Alicia says with dead seriousness.
Beyonce is taken a back by Alicia's statement. She wears a WTF!?!? expression for a moment, before regaining her composure. "Don't play Asshole." Beyonce whispers back in Alicia's ear. "I'll fuck you up! I ain't the one to play with." Beyonce says as she tightens her hug so tight that it is a borderline bear hug.
"No. I'm tired of you playing me like a chump, bitch!" Alicia definitively snaps back. "You act like you rule the world, and nobody is on your level. I've sold albums like you, and have more Grammies than you. I'm not bowing down or kissing your ass." Alicia finishes as she tightens her hug tight enough to definitely qualify as a bear hug. "I'm not bragging saying I'm prettier than you." Alicia says maintaining her natural modesty and acknowledging Beyonce's beauty. "But, I'm not an egotistical, hard ass, phony bitch like you either! I'm sure Jay would appreciate a real woman like me."
Beyonce growls loudly and squeezes Alicia hard enough to make her friend groan, "Unnghhh!"
Alicia responds by squeezing Beyonce back harder, making her growl, "Ouuww!"
Tyra had closed the show while Alicia and Beyonce were hugging and thanked her audience for attending. She is shocked to see her guest in a double bearhug contest once she turned around. The studio audience was not going anywhere seeing the divas once again embroiled in another heated contest. Anyway Tyra is professional enough to go with it and announce and officiate the bearhug contest as well.
Beyonce realized in the opening moments of the match during their initial test of strength that she and Alicia are very evenly matched strength wise. However Beyonce is a couple of inches taller than her friend. That works to her advantage in a test of strength, but to her disadvantage in this bear hug challenge. Alicia has a better grip around Beyonce's body, and much better leverage. She has Beyonce's rib cage creaking and groaning. Beyonce's grip on Alicia is higher and not nearly as effective. To Alicia's delight, Beyonce can not hide her anguish.
Alicia knows it is only a matter of time before she wins, but winning is not her objective. Beating Beyonce is her objective. To do that she continues playing mind games with her friend. She would never do this and be this cruel with anyone else but her old pal, Beyonce. Alicia begins with a taunting laugh in Beyonce's ear as the champion struggles in her clutches. Next she softly sings "Loser" as Beyonce readjusts her grip and redoubles her efforts, but still can not turn the tide of the battle. Alicia knows calling Beyonce an egotistical bitch bothers her. She also knows that Beyonce has learned to deal with that lable after the media and fans pinned it on her after the original Destiny Child break up. Beyonce suffered a mini depression following the bad rap. However Beyonce never takes losing well. "Loser" Alicia repeatedly sings in her friend's ear.
Beyonce grunts and groans angrily in Alicia's clutches. She keeps readjusting her grip, searching for better leverage, but nothing works. She knows Alicia has her captured in her trap, but refuses to give up. She is beyond angry at being called a loser and an egotistical bitch. But Alicia is crushing her like a boa constrictor. Beyonce's ribs are bound and restrained by Alicia's embrace so much that she can barely sip a breath.
Alicia savors the guilty pleasure of crushing Beyonce. She has Beyonce's body pressed against hers tightly. The skin on skin contact tantalizes Alicia. Beyonce's bigger breasts are smashed flat like pancakes against her smaller breasts and excites Alicia. She sees the strained expressions on Beyonce's face as she struggles to channel all the strength in her fabulous bronzed body through her arms to crush her rival. Alicia senses that Beyonce has no where near enough power in her oxygen deprived body to mount a comeback, yet she still stubbornly tries. Alicia admires that determination in her friend. She relishes the thought of squeezing it out of her. "loser... loser... loser" Alicia whispers in her buddy's ear, toying with Beyonce.
Once Beyonce has a far and distant look in her eyes, Alicia chides, "Ahhhh what's the matter B? Sasha Fierce can't help you? Oh that's right. Sasha is just an imaginary, make believe alter ego for a phony, fake ass bitch! I'm kicking you and your imaginary friend's ass. Why? Because I'm Alicia Keys! I'm Superwoman, even with all my flaws, I'm Superwoman." Alicia proclaims and cranks up the power on her bear hug.
Beyonce starts feeling light headed. As the lactate acid builds up in her arms from exertion, her arms get as heavy as lead. Because of the lack of air, Beyonce looses her bearings for a moment. She tries to tighten her grip on Alicia. Beyonce then discovers that her feet are off the mat. Alicia has hoisted Beyonce up, and crushing all that is left out of Beyonce. The champion can not maintain her grip. Her arms fall limply to her sides.
Tyra is right there like a good referee. Tyra lifts Beyonce's arm up, allowing it to fall down limply. Beyonce looks at her arm falling the third and final time, like she can not believe that her body is betraying her, and allowing Alicia to win.
Tyra calls for the bell again. Alicia slings Beyonce to the mat like a stinky bag of trash and starts celebrating her victory. Tyra raises Alicia’s arm announcing, "And the winner of our impromptu bearhug contest, Alicia Keys!" Alicia makes just as big of a display as Beyonce did earlier. It is Beyonce turn to lie on the canvas and watch Alicia enviously.
Alicia returns to Beyonce soon, looking down on her with her sweet angelic smile. "Now we're even" Alicia says offering her hand to help Beyonce up. Beyonce takes the hand and gets to her feet with a groan. As soon as she is standing, Alicia says, "Here's your belt, champ." as she hands Beyonce her championship belt. "Let's get cleaned up so we can go to dinner. I'm starved."
"Cool A. I got a craving for Popeye's Chicken." Beyonce says with a giggle.
"Alright, I've got a song I want you to sing with me on my new album." Alicia adds.
The screen returns to Tyra, and her documentary. "Just like that, they were back to being friends again. They walked out arm in arm, and acted as if the match and bear hug contest never happened." Tyra analyzes. "It reminds me of the comic book relationship between Superman and Batman. They are the closest friends. They are like brothers that love trust, and admire each other totally. However when circumstances pit them against each other, they turn into fierce rivals. They have utter resentment and contempt for the same qualities that they admire in each other. Batman carries kryptonite in his utility belt at all times, just in case he needs to kill Superman one day. Superman seems certain that he'll have to bring Batman to justice for his sins one day. They look like they eagerly await the day they bring each other down. Yet they are still best friends and brothers. Strange relationships. Batman/Superman, Magic/Bird, and Beyonce and Alicia all time greats, all time friends, all time rivals.... strange relationships."
BACK TO THE CELEBRITIES
TO ALICIA KEYS
FOLLOW Ana Foxxx TO PUBLIC DISGRACE!