THE ROAD TO
VS 
BEYONCE VS MADONNA
Beyonce is not a real happy camper right now. It is time for her to make a mandatory War Queen title defense. Alright she gets that. The league is also kicking off a revolutionary new weekly TV show for cable tv. Everyone in the league office is excited. This will be an enormous vehicle for the league. They want Beyonce on the premier show. Alright she gets that. They wanted this to be a tune up bout for the RAGE! PPV. They would also announce her opponent for the huge RAGE! Main Event. Big premier, yeah Beyonce definitely gets that. Hell she specializes in that. The problem is they booked Madonna for the tune up match. Madonna, the former War Queen and catfighting legend Madonna as a freaking tune up. Yeah Vegas still has Beyonce as the overwhelming favorite. Beyonce understands that they needed a big name to sell the debut show, but Madonna?
"They must think I'm fucking Wonder Woman to be able to beat Madonna like a scrub!" Beyonce complained to the other Fab Four members. "I wonder who they'll book me to fight at RAGE!, Mike Tyson?"
Fortunately Beyonce may be the closest thing we have to Wonder Woman in this day and age. After she got tired of complaining about her Herculean task, she started preparing herself to complete defeat another formidable opponent.
Madonna has been an elite competitor since the inception of the league. She boasts a list of accomplishments that include being the first Hardcore Champion, first Cock Fight Champion, and a War Queen championship. Then she led a team called Blonde Ambition featuring Britney Spears to a long and dominating War Queen title reign. In fact the feared ABA was created by Alyssa Milano to end Blonde Ambition's dominance.
There are reasons this great legend is booked as a tune up bout though. First, Madonna has not been active in the league in over two years. She has not been seen since Britney Spears loss to Nelly Furtado in Las Vegas. The condition of that impromptu match was that a Britney loss forces Blonde Ambition to disband. Following Britney's loss Madonna took a plane to England, and the rest is history. The second reason is that Madonna is 52 years old. Between her advanced age and inactivity beating the best the league has to offer seems inhumanly possible.
Beyonce is not buying this "load of crap" for one moment. Human is not a word used to describe Madonna often. It is fucking Madonna, the master of re-invention. Madonna has had an inhuman, mutant ability to re-invent herself for 20 years now and remains relevant to each generation. During Madonna's last concert tour, Sticky & Sweet , Madonna's body was absolutely cut out of stone. She was a work of art, with no fat, or anything out of place. That was before she started opening a series of fitness centers around the world, called Hard Candy Fitness. Beyonce is not buying this as a tune up bout at all. She expects to face a Hall of Fame competitor, in tip top physical condition, who would like no more than to re-invent herself by beating Beyonce for the War Queen title, then headlining RAGE! in a return match with Beyonce. Beyonce is smart enough to have a return match clause built into the contract, just in case.
Beyonce began her preparation by talking to her Fab Four mentors, Jennifer Lopez, Halle Berry and Pam Anderson, all of who have defeated Madonna at her best. Jennifer described her as opportunistic. Halle called her cold, and Pam described her as greedy. However all said that she was not overly skilled, just dangerous. She uses the 'Madonna Magic' to intimidate, out think and utilizes opportunities to be successful. Beyonce still did not like it. Who knows what to expect from Madonna after 2 years of hiding.
Beyonce continued to worry about the Hall of Famer until she heard an all too familiar voice saying, "Opportunistic, cold greedy.... Sounds like me. Don't worry. I'll help you take care of Madonna. We'll take care of her together."
Beyonce smiled. The voice was Beyonce's own voice, or more specifically it was the voice of her evil alter ego, Sasha Fierce.
The production of the new show, Stone Rage CATFIGHTS! was brilliant. Everything about the show begged that it is the beginning of something big. Tyra Banks is the initial guess hostess. The show had celebrity interviews with Jennifer Love Hewitt about her upcoming title defense against Eva Longoria. Mariah Carey appeared discussing her controversial intergender match with her husband Nick Cannon battling Eminiem and Vida Guerra. It also featured highlights of relevant past matches. Overall an enthralling show.
The main event of the show was of course the match. It was held at a small arena, much smaller than the huge forums where the Pay Per View's take place. The audience paid stiff prices for the right to attend. The crowd got more than their money's worth. Their night began with a performance by P!nk. After an hour of P!nk on stage, performing Icon Janet Jackson took the stage. Janet is not a fan of Madonna or Beyonce. She relished the opportunity to steal the spotlight from both of those them. Finally it is time for the match. Also the rumors of who Beyonce would face in the RAGE! main event abound.
Beyonce is backstage with her chief trainer, Pam Anderson. "You ready?" Pam asks. Beyonce answers with a simple head nod. Pam has been training Beyonce for over a year now, and training for this match was extremely unfamiliar and strange from her previous experiences training Beyonce.
By nature Beyonce is a nice, private and reserved person. Pam recognizes this. Beyonce overcomes this by a strange transformation into her alter ego, Sasha Fierce. Beyonce becomes a totally different person. She is daring, provocative, sexy and evil. Usually Beyonce transforms into Sasha as soon training starts. Sasha is angry foul mouthed and ranting. She appears to be driven by rage. Then after the training session Beyonce returns to her normal good natured self. Pam feels like George Halas coaching Dick Butkis, or Cus D'Amato training a young Mike Tyson. She tries to tame a monster, and then unleash it on an unsuspecting prey. Pam is used to dealing with the raving, spoiled diva, Sasha Fierce during training, but Sasha never showed up this time.
Beyonce publicly announced that she "...is done with Sasha Fierce. I killed her." Beyonce clarified that she has grown and does not need her. What she meant is that they have merged, they have become one.
The Beyonce that showed up for training for this match was totally different than before. She was calm, cool and collected. Beyonce was no less lethal in the ring though. Actually she was more lethal. Without the boiling rage, she is more precise. Beyonce is much more calculated, and not a beast ruled by emotion. However she maintained all of her aggression and intensity. Her attention to detail and technique allowed Beyonce to inflict the maximum amount of pain in the shortest amount of time. Overnight Beyonce went from coaching a "Monster of the Midway" like Butkis or Mike Singeltary to a deadly assassin like Tom Brady or Peyton Manning. Pam marveled at Beyonce daily during training. Beyonce was damned near unbeatable. Beyonce was like the Ultimate fighter, The Super Solider, and the Ultimate Warrior all rolled into one.
Still Pam was extremely nervous about how this new emotionless Beyonce would react under the heat of combat. She questioned Beyonce frequently. "Are you sure you're ready? Madonna is a former champion and a Hall of Famer." Pam asked as she and Beyonce quietly warmed up in the dressing room with an calm demeanor.
Sensing her trainer's concern, and knowing exactly what was concerning her, Beyonce answered. "Don't worry, Sasha is still here."
There was a mean edge in Beyonce's voice that sent a chill down Pam's spine. Pam recognized that voice. It was Sasha Fierces' speaking voice speaking through Beyonce's calm lips. Pam smiled, "Madonna is fucking toast." The blonde chuckled. "Hall of Famer my ass, she doesn't stand a chance."
Beyonce struts to the ring by herself, with Pam staying behind in the dressing room. She sees Madonna in the ring waiting for her. The legendary blonde is wearing her customary black leather bikini, looking like an evil dominatrix. No matter the outcome of the match, Madonna is thrilled to be on this stage and in this spotlight. Madonna sees Beyonce as a star on her level. This is a match that will go down in history and live forever. Two different generations of Hall of Famers clashing on the premier episode of a show that is destined to become legendary. This has the feel of something huge.
Looking in the ring Beyonce could not help but to notice Madonna's 'guns'. Madonna's arms looked carved out of stone. They were huge with bulging biceps. Beyonce shook her head seeing Madonna's arms. She imagines a punch fired by her guns is going to hurt like hell. Beyonce admires and respects Madonna to the upmost. Beyonce reminds herself how dangerous of a competitor Madonna can be. Somewhere in Beyonce's psyche, Sasha Fierce is smiling. She loves it. She is the champion, fighting the great Madonna, on the largest of stages. What could be better than this? Sasha's personality starts moving to the forefront, taking over Beyonce's body.
Beyonce crawls into the ring wearing a sly smile. She also is wearing a glimmering gold one piece outfit similar to her stage costumes. Her big round chocolate thighs look every bit as amazing as Madonna's arms. Both vixens wear the same sly smile, in anticipation of this big match and this huge occasion. Madonna walks up to Beyonce and says, "I'm surprised that my belt fits around your waist, fat ass." the blonde quips trying to rattle the younger champion.
"Shut grand ma!" Beyonce dismissively spouts. "Don't make me hurt you more than I already am." Not to be spoken to like that, Madonna puts her hand on Beyonce's forehead and mushes her face back. Beyonce take a couple awkward steps back. Then her nostrils flare in fury and she surges forward. Beyonce gives Madonna a hard two handed shove to her chest. The smaller blonde is propelled back several feet to an ungraceful landing on her ass. The crowd start "ooooing and ahhhing" at the champion's power, as Madonna comes to a skidding halt against the ropes on the other side of the ring.
Realizing that the time for playing has passed, the timekeeper rings the bell. Madonna leaps to her feet and charges across the ring at Beyonce. At the last moment, Beyonce side steps Madonna and takes her down with a leg sweep. Madonna falls flat on her face. Beyonce quickly leaps on top and captures Madonna's head under her arm, locking her in a front face lock.
Madonna ends up on her hands and knees facing Beyonce. Her head is captured under Beyonce's right arm pit, with the champion's arm wrapped around and her forearm is pressed against Madonna's throat. Fiendishly, Beyonce reaches over and spanks Madonna's tight butt. Beyonce gets rousing laughs from the crowd as she stingingly smacks Madonna's ass eight or nine times.
Madonna squirms and struggles before powering up to her feet. Byonce rose to her feet with Madonna, still maintaining her face lock. Beyonce abruptly releases Madonna then drives her knee up into the blonde's gut an instant later. Madonna releases a loud "OOooommph" and hops in the air before clutching her stomach.
Madonna wobbles back against the ropes obviously sucking air to refill her lungs. Beyonce follows Madonna, seizes her arm and whips the blonde across the ring. Madonna collides into the corner turnbuckle across the ring. As Madonna's back hits the corner, she sees Beyonce charging into the corner after her. At the last possible moment, Madonna slips out of the corner, allowing Beyonce to crash chest first into the turnbuckle. Before Beyonce's grunt from the impact can subside, Madonna's foot flashes up and kicks Beyonce in the back of the head. Beyonce staggers back a couple of steps holding the back of her head. The champion is seeing stars after Madonna has kicked the back of her cranium. Next the wily veteran takes Beyonce's feet out from under her, skillfully and purposely causing her Beyonce to fall forward and guillotine her throat across the middle rope. As Beyonce gags on her knees and still leans against the middle rope. Within three seconds Madonna has darted across the ring and bounced off the far side ropes and drop kicks Beyonce on the back of her shoulders. Again Beyonce's throat is clothes lined on the middle rope. Beyonce bounces off the rope and falls to the mat wearing a grimace.
Madonna quickly dives across Beyonce's chest for a pin. The champion is able to kick out as the referee's hand hits the canvas the second time.
Beyonce sits up obviously still stunned, and out of breath. Madonna pops to her feet wearing an evil expression. The blonde 'helps' Beyonce to her feet by her curly hair. Hearing the crowd trying to rally her, instinctively Beyonce starts fighting back. She fires elbows into Madonna's midsection as the challenger hair hauls the champion to her feet. Madonna extinguishes Beyonce's resistance with a flurry of kicks that knocks Beyonce back to the mat.
Madonna delivers an elbow drop right in Beyonce's gut. The champion convulses and flops on the mat. Seeing the effectiveness, Madonna leaps and delivers a second elbow drop into Beyonce's stomach. With Beyonce suffering and holding her stomach, Madonna climbs the turnbuckles to the top rope. An instant later Madonna leaps off and goes flying through the air with her blonde hair flowing in the breeze. However just before Madonna comes crashing down into Beyonce's gut again, the champion growls and rolls out of the way. Madonna crashes down to the empty spot on the canvas.
Madonna scrambles to her feet while holding her throbbing elbow. Beyonce stands, waiting with Sasha Fierce's fiery eyes. Once Madonna stands, Beyonce strikes with a kick to the blonde's stomach. Madonna doubles over and is immediately knocked for a loop by a Beyonce clothesline. The smack of skin hitting skin is even louder than the thud of Madonna's hard body hitting the canvas. Madonna quickly springs up to her feet, only to be leveled again by Beyonce's running clothesline. Madonna's hard body practically bounces off the mat like a rubber ball and the blonde ends right back up on her feet almost unwillingly. Beyonce charges and runs Madonna over like a freight train.
Madonna struggles to her feet. She is rocked and even more confused by the devastating power of the champion. Beyonce answers some of that confusion by scooping her smaller challenger up in her arms with extreme ease. Beyonce takes a leisurely lap around the ring, flaunting her strength and dominance of the legendary blonde. Sasha Fiece is the consummate showman. After parading Madonna around, as she squirms and pleads "no" Beyonce retreats to a corner. Then she gets a running start, and leaps in the air and drives Madonna to the mat with a power slam.
Beyonce pops up and plays to the crowd. Meanwhile Madonna lies on the mat with the stuffing knocked out of her. She has never faced anybody in the ring like Beyonce before. Her assault is simple, but has devastating results. The champion has text book execution, excellent defense and tremendous power. Pam has done a masterful job training this phenom. Then Beyonce has another level. At some point her eyes burn with contained fury. Her already considerable power seems to double. She becomes ruthless and brutal. Madonna likens wrestling Beyonce like facing a force of nature. The woman was fierce!
Beyonce knew that power slam had hurt Madonna. After flaunting with the audience, Beyonce decided to entertain herself and the audience with a few seductive dance moves. However it does not take long before Madonna is rising to her feet. After all, the blonde legend is truly a great fighter with a lot of spirit and pride. Madonna just got powerfully driven and smeared across the mat, but that is not going to stop her. Madonna uses the assistance of the ropes to get to her feet.
Once Madonna has risen to one knee, Beyonce's eyes turn cold like a viper. In an instant the champion is on the beleaguered blonde vixen, and helping her to her feet by her golden hair. Beyonce angrily whips Madonna across the ring, but the rebellious maverick who took the 80's by storm had other plans. Madonna reverses the whip and sends Beyonce crashing into the corner turnbuckle instead. Beyonce grunts as her back violently hits the corner.
Of course Madonna comes charging in an instant later. Beyonce raises her foot and Madonna runs face first into Beyonce's thigh high boot's sole. Madonna knocks herself silly. The blonde wobbles and staggers on rubber legs in a daze. Beyonce quickly pulls herself up, so she is seated on the top turnbuckle. Beyonce reaches out and snatches a handful of Madonna's hair and draws her into the corner. From her seated position, Beyonce opens her legs apart. She reveals her inviting puss covered by the gold fabric of her erotic one piece outfit, and three inches of leather covered turnbuckle. Next Beyonce starts slamming Madonna's face into the turnbuckle, between her legs. Next Beyonce makes sexy erotic loud grunts every time Madonna's face hits the hard turnbuckle. Beyonce yelps, "Unh... Uhn.. Uhn.... Uhn.... Uhn... Uhn...." accompanied with a fuck face, as if Madonna's face is pounding her pussy instead of the turnbuckle. After over 23 slams into the turnbuckle, each accompanied by a Maria Sharapova like grunt, Beyonce releases her victim.
Madonna staggers back like a drunken sailor. She is out on her feet. The maverick has no clue where she is, or what she is doing. Beyonce stands from her seated position so she is elevated, standing on the middle rope. Beyonce wastes no time leaping off and nearly taking Madonna's dizzy head off with a flying clothesline.
Beyonce springs to her feet again, leaving Madonna lying flat on her back. Nobody really expected her to get up after the beating she just withstood. Beyonce reaches down and rips Madonna off the canvas. She Beyonce forces Madonna's head between her thick chocolate thighs. The fans are already chanting "Beyonce Bomb! Beyonce Bomb!" Beyonce does not disappoint. She hoists Madonna up, flips her around and Power Bombs Madonna to the mat with a thunderous boom.
Beyonce falls across the fallen legend's chest. The champion hooks Madonna's leg and pulls it tight as possible. She purposely does this not to prevent the blonde from kicking out, but to pull her barely covered ass in the air and on display. The referee eagerly makes the three count.
After its all over, and the fans are cheering the victor, many developed a befuddled expression. They look at their watches and cell phones to confirm their suspicions. Beyonce has just obliterated the former War Queen, the legendary, Hall of Famer Madonna in just over seven minutes. They shake their heads in dismay. Meanwhile Madonna lies on the mat looking like a total wreck. She looks like she has just endured an hour long war.
Once the bell rings, Beyonce rises and modestly smiles and waves to the audience. She takes bows to acknowledge the roaring ovation she is receiving. The diva looks like a performer who has just completed a Broadway musical.
Once Madonna started reviving, Beyonce rushes to her side and assisting the fallen legend. Beyonce shows genuine concern for her opponent. Beyonce helps the blond to her feet, while lavishing her with praise, compliments and admiration. Beyonce warmly hugs the legend then raises Madonna's arm and presents her to the fans. The fans give Madonna a standing ovation, not only for her performance tonight, but for a career full of memories. After receiving her just due, Madonna exits the ring for the comfort of her dressing room. Beyonce remains in the ring for the big announcement of who her opponent will be for the RAGE! main event.
Beyonce is expecting Pam Grier, Lynda Carter, Loni Anderson or Raquel Welch from the booking committee. Then to her surprise, The Resistance's Cameron Diaz leads Kelly Hu, Nikki Cox and Ashlee Simpson from backstage and stand at the head of the ramp. "Hey Beyonce. Great win!" Cameron begins speaking. Beyonce just glares back at Cameron suspiciously wondering what is going on.
"I know, you're surprised to see us." Cameron begins to explain. "Do you remember that Fatal Fourway match at THE GOLD EXPERIENCE! when you won that War Queen title? You might remember that Christina Applegate had a return match clause in that contract should she lose the belt. Well we've bought that right from Christina Applegate for the hefty sum of one dollar! Read it and weep! That gives us the right to book you in any match we want, against anybody we want, and anytime we want!"
While the crowd murmurs, some boo to Cameron's response, Beyonce is emotionless. She maintains the picture of poise and elegance. "So at RAGE! your opponent will be..... RIHANNA!"
There is nothing but babble, confusion and murmurs from everyone. First Rihanna is not in Cameron's group, The Resistance. Second, Rihanna is a friend of Beyonce. Beyonce's husband, Jay-Z, is Rihanna's mentor. Rihanna and Jay are extremely close, perhaps even too close for Beyonce's taste. However Rihanna is a close friend of the family. Beyonce is Rihanna's idol and role model. Pitting Beyonce against Rihanna is extremely odd. It is an occurrence that does not seem to benefit Cameron or the Resistance. Everybody, including Beyonce, stands totally confused by this announcement.
Cameron chuckles having befuddled everyone in the arena. She admits to herself that it feels totally awesome to be in total control over the situation, and others. It is still a strange sensation for her.
"There are a few added stipulations to make things interesting." Cameron announces as she confidently paces back and forth at top the ramp. "If you lose Beyonce, you not only lose the title, but you're out of the Fab Four, forever!"
"Stipulation number 2!" Cameron begins again. "If you win, then Rihanna is subjugated to twenty minutes of live sex, right in the middle of the ring!" Beyonce's eyes narrow and she gets a sly smile. She sees Cameron's angle. She is trying to put the champion in an awkward position.
"The lucky dog that gets to fuck Rihanna will be chosen from the audience here tonight. The lucky devil is seated in skybox D seat #354." Cameron broadcasts. The spotlight flashes and shines all around the arena before stopping at it's target. The occupant of skybox D seat #354 is suddenly revealed as Beyonce's husband, Jay-Z.
The audience reacts with loud murmurs and babble. Beyonce quickly grabs a microphone to announce her protest. "Oh Hell no!" Beyonce blazons. "That's my man. He's not getting in any ring and fucking anything. I forbid it!"
Cameron smiles. "Chill out Beyonce I understand, I can see why you wouldn't want your man fucking a hot girl like Rihanna. I bet it'd make him think three or fourth times about coming back home to you." Cameron cracks. "After all we can't make Jay-Z do anything. There are alternative options. If Jay-Z refuses, then we have some other guys to fuck Rihanna. We have T-Pain, Beanie Siegal, Damon Dash, 50 Cent and Chris Brown available."
Every guy that Cameron named have personal grudges against Jay-Z. All of them would like nothing better than to publically deflower Jay's prize to get revenge on the hip hop mogul. However Chris Brown was Rihanna's boyfriend whose relationship ended disastrously. Cameron was actually lying about Chris Brown, but it pushed the right buttons. There was no way that Jay would risk Brown getting his hands on his lil angel again. There is no need for a lip reader. Jay can be seen mouthing vigorously "Hell No! They're not touching her! I'm in, I'm in, I'm down."
Beyonce starts a slow burn, realizing that she is powerless to stop this match, and these stipulations or her husband's involvement in this match. Beyonce despises this powerless feeling. "It's all settled." Cameron broadcasts to Beyonce's chagrin. "The main event of RAGE! It's BEYONCE VERSUS RIHANNA for the War Queen Championship! If Beyonce loses, she's outta the Fab Four! If Rihanna loses she get's a fuck session from Beyonce's husband Jay-Z! Good luck champ!"
Beyonce watches Cameron and her crew exit. She crawls out of the ring, heading for her dressing room. Beyonce regains a smile, and slaps hands of fans as she makes her exit. Once in the relative seclusion of her dressing room, the diva roars like a lioness and grabs a glass and throws it against the wall as hard as she could. "FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!" Beyonce says as she paces back and forth, then kicks over a food tray. Finally Beyonce collapse in a chair, burying her face in her hands, repeating, "I'm so screwed" sounding like she is about to break into tears.
Beyonce's team mates, Pam Anderson, Kim Kardashian, and Kimora Lee Simmons look at Beyonce's tantrum in silent amazement. Finally Pam gets the nerve to say, "Bey relax. What's wrong?"
"What's wrong!!?!! I'm about to lose my husband to a skinny Barbadian slut! That's what's wrong!" Beyonce shouts back.
Shaking her head in dismay at seeing Beyonce falling apart, Kim counsels, "What are you worried about, you're Beyonce! You're one of the most beautiful women in the world. You're one of the classiest and most elegant women in the business. Every woman in the world either admires or idolizes you or is jealous of you. You're every man's desire. You should never worry about another woman taking your man."
Beyonce nods her head in agreement, trying to believe Kim's soothing words. Then she shakes her head negatively, "Who am I kidding? If anybody can take Jay from me it's Rihanna. He adores her. If she wasn't so young and inexperienced, she would have gotten him to kick me to the curb a long time ago. She can take him if she really wanted to." Beyonce looks at her friends then confess. "See I suspected Jay of cheating on me. I thought it may have been with Rihanna. I went to him and put my foot down. I got all Sasha Fierce. I told him to put a ring on it or I was through. I got my ring, and we got married a few weeks later and the rest is history. Rihanna was a teenager then, but she's a full grown woman now. If she has another chance she might......" Beyonce's voice trails off.
"Bey you're over reacting" Kimora chimes in. "I've known Jay for twenty years. You have nothing to worry about."
Her friends try to convince Beyonce that Rihanna is no threat for several minutes with no success. Finally Pam says, "I don't believe I'm saying this, but I've been married more times than all of you. If you really feel that strongly about it, just throw the match. Then Jay won't fuck Rihanna."
Beyonce looks up in more confusion. "You see it’s not that easy. Jay loves strength and power. It intoxicates him. If her felt I purposely threw the match, he would view that as weakness in me. He would see more strength in Rihanna for taking advantage of my weakness, plus Rihanna kicking my ass all over the ring. That would probably do more damage to my marriage than him fucking Rihanna." Beyonce explains. "I'm fucked either way."
Elsewhere in the arena Nikki Cox asks Cameron "Are you sure giving Rihanna the title shot was a good idea?"
"The Skipper is sure." Cameron answers referring to the Resistance's mysterious consultant and mentor. "Remember she's been in the ring with her. The Skipper says that Beyonce is hard, but beatable. She says that Sasha Fierce is totally unbeatable. Any of us will face the wrath of Sasha Fierce, but Rihanna will be fighting Beyonce. Once Rihanna takes the title from Sasha Fierce, we will have no problem taking the belt from her later." Cameron then adds, "I love it when a plan comes together."
BACK TO THE CELEBRITIES
TO BEYONCE 
TO MADONNA
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