Celebrity Championship Wrestling Show 17 by Big Fan
(Match Promos by Archer)
MATCH ONE (TAG TEAMS) The Bone Slayers (Gellar-Deschanel) vs. Johansson-Cuoco

We find the two teams gathered in front of two podiums. The Bone Slayers, Sarah Michelle Gellar and Emily Deschanel don’t look happy. Scarlett and Kaley look eager to go. Both are wearing their battle bikinis with CCW jackets over them which give all four an appealing leggy look.

“What are you, two so grumpy about, afraid we’ll beat you?” Kaley quips.

“That must be it, Kaley,” Scarlett chimes in, “after all, we’re the hottest new team in the CCW.”

Sarah Michelle Gellar gives vent to a loud, “HA!” Scarlett and Kaley look a bit startled. Sarah glares at them, “You two twits couldn’t beat the Simpson sisters! You call yourselves ‘hot’? We should be fighting for the title not fighting you two.”

Emily says apologetically, “Sarah’s pretty sore about Team Archer getting the title shot, I’m not too thrilled either.”

“May I remind you, Sarah, that I beat you in a Division XX fight,” Scarlett tells Sarah.

“And I’m 3 and 2 myself,” Kaley added.

“You know, Scarlett, I’m glad you reminded me about that,” Sarah says dangerously. “Now I AM interested in this fight. I plan on making it my business to kick your worthless butt around the ring-and if you beanpole partner gets in our way-she can expect the same thing!”

“That goes for me, too!” Emily declared.

Scarlett and Kaley clench their fists and square off against Sarah and Emily. Emily at 5’9 faces off against the 5’7 Kaley, while 5’4” Scarlett and 5’3” Sarah are just about eye-to-glaring-eye!

Off -Stage a voice says, “I think we have enough, ladies. Thank you!” They exchange chesty bumps, then back off and - warily watching each other - exit the stage.

Christina is outside the CCW locker room when she hears angry voices, a loud crash, and suddenly the door flies open and a red-haired fury tears past the surprised Latina. She recognized her as Isla Fisher, but steps back and waits for the angry Aussie to be gone. Then Christina peeks inside the locker room. Her eyes widen, her jaw drops and she bursts out laughing.

Lacey Chabert is crawling out from under a tipped over laundry cart, wet towels are in her hair and there is bewildered look on her face. It was this expression that made Christina laugh. Lacey hears the laugh and looks up.

“Enjoy laughing now, Milian, you won’t when I get through with you,” Lacey said trying to sound menacing.

“Dios mio! What did that loco Isla do to you, amiga?” Christina asked, pulling Lacey to her feet. She realized Lacey was wearing the tattered remnants of a two-piece workout suit.

“I am not your friend!” Lacey snapped, but added. “Thanks, anyway. I don’t know what’s wrong with her. She used to be chasing me all the time, she’d call me ‘She-Bear’ and it was even kinda cute. Then I come in here, minding my own business, and see her. I try to be friendly and say ‘Hi, Isla! How are you doing?’ She turns around and jumps me. She tries to stuff me into a locker and then she gives me a power bomb into that laundry cart.”

“Sounds like she ees ‘muy loco’,” Christina observed. “I hope she don’t hurtchu. I wan’ plenty left when I beatcha!”

Lacey grinned and put her hands under her bountiful bosoms, “No way, Chrissy, my girls will be putting you sound asleep.”

Christina rubbed her own breasts, “You doan’ know what ‘mi amigas’ can do to you. You will learn the hard way.”

Lacey smirked, “My girls and I love a good challenge.”

“So do ‘Mis amigas’,” Christina assured her with a leering grin.

Lacey licked her lips and Christina did the same, then they both giggled wickedly as they eyed each other with anticipation.

“You know, Lacey, maybe you just need to be nicer to Isla; perhaps she’s feeling ‘disappointed’ in love,” Christina said with a sly smile.

“I doubt it,” Lacey retorted. Then she added with genuine puzzlement, “I wonder what’s got into her...”

Jennifer Love Hewitt had been looking all over the CCW Arena for Neve Campbell, but the leader of the Legion was as hard to find as her group’s lair. Love finally gave up and started back to her car when suddenly a hooded Neve stood not three feet in front of her.

Jen was startled, but quickly controlled herself.

“Nice trick, Neve Do you do children’s birthday parties in your spare time?” Jennifer said forcing a smile. “I hear magicians are the ‘in’ thing nowadays.”

“You were looking for me. I decided to save you the trouble. You are the one person that deserves a chance to talk to Neve. I understand you must be afraid to face Banshee.” Neve said quietly.

“I can take care of myself, Neve, though I would appreciate it if you kept your girls away from the fight. I don’t think that’s asking too much of a former partner. We were a great team, Neve, we were champions.”

“Because I molded you.”

Jennifer looked Neve in the eyes-or tried to, it wasn’t easy to see them under that hood in the dim lighting of the corridor, “I don’t deny you put me in the road to becoming the wrestler I am today. I owe you for that, but, you know, Neve, you taught me something else…to fight fair. I remember that every fight I’m in and, believe me, it’s not always easy to practice. You seem to have forgotten it.”

“I haven’t forgotten. I’ve evolved. The person you knew is not the same one you’ll meet in the ring. I see now that I was naïve, you have to make your own destiny, Love. I’m making mine with the Legion,” Neve said, then her voice softened, “and there is still a place among us for you. These girls have talent, but not like you do. Stand with us-stand with me.”

Love’s voice was firm, but sad, “I can’t do that, Neve. You taught me too well. I won’t abandon my beliefs.”

Neve’s voice was cold, but not untouched by regret, “Then Banshee shall have to teach you a new lesson. Just bear in mind, I did warn you.”

Love nodded, “Since when did you start speaking about yourself in the third person? Goodbye, Neve, I will see you at the show.”

“Farewell, Lovely,” Neve said. “You should know, this is the last time you’ll talk to Neve. When we meet again, Banshee will be the one standing in front of you!”

With that Neve was gone into the shadows. Jennifer felt a chill, not so much of fear for herself, but fear at what her former friend and partner had become...

(Eva Longoria & Eva Mendes vs. Camilla Belle and Michelle Trachtenberg).

In the lounge of the CCW Arena, Camilla and Michelle are wearing their brand new “Team Archer” fighting bikinis (light blue top and dark blue bottoms for Camilla with a light blue “T.A.” lettered across the seat; dark blue top and light blue bottoms with a dark blue lettered “T.A” across the seat for Michelle). They are showing them off to their patron Archer.

“You girls have made me proud,” Archer tells them. “You’ve come a long way in a short time. I know The Eva’s are tough, but I believe in you and I believe you have a good chance of beating them.”

Camilla and Michelle beamed. They grinned and spoke in their oddly appealing alternate word way, “Thank you, Mr. Archer, we’ll do out best to bring home the belts. We couldn’t have done it without you. You were the one who realized we could be a great team!”

With that they impulsively moved to hug Archer, but somehow as they came together all three of their heads butted together. Archer and the ladies recoiled backwards. A throw rug suddenly went out from under Camilla and as she fell, her arms waved wildly and one of them clipped the swaying Michelle. The two went down on their butts.

“Are you all right?” Archer asked anxiously.

The girls rubbed their butts, but said, “We’re fine. Are you okay?”

A bruise was forming on Archer’s forehead, “I’ll live. I know you girls still have a few kinks to work out, but you’re still a wonderful team. I know you can beat the champs.”

Archer helped Michelle and Camilla to their feet and all three headed to the kitchen go get some ice for their heads. After they were gone, out of the shadows emerged Eva Longoria and Eva Mendes; both doubled up with laughter.

“This is going to be easier than I thought,” Eva Longoria said confidently.

“We’ll make Harold sorry he ever thought a couple of stupid rookies like them could beat US!”

“Ah, but he won’t be sorry as those gringas will be,” Eva Longoria gloated. “Maybe we should take those suits of theirs. They would look so cute on our wall.”

Eva Mendes laughed, “I’ll think about it. I tell you, we are going to have lots of fun with those two.”

The two Eva’s walked off still laughing derisively, unaware that Camilla and Michelle had returned and overheard them. The two young wrestlers were grim-faced. “They are SO going to be sorry they laughed at us!” Team Archer said in unison as, with determination, they clasped hands and shook in agreement.

Allison appears at the podium accompanied by Erica Durance and Billie Piper. She is wearing jeans and a tee shirt with the slogan, DOWN WITH THE LEGION! Her friends wear the same slogan on tee shirts.

A robed and hooded Katherine Heigl makes her entrance accompanied by Agnes Bruckner and Erika Christiansen, who are also wearing the garb of a Legion member.

“You think you’re going to get a shot at our leader’s title belt?” Katherine sneered. “You never going to wear that belt again and we of the Legion are here to make sure of that.”

Allison looked calmly at the taller Heigl, “Your gutless boss is using you to soften me up, bird brain. She knows I can beat you, but she figures you’ll do some damage and make it easier on her when I face her. Nice plan, but you aren’t woman enough to beat me that badly Heigl-and if any of your girlie girls show up, well, as you can see I have friends, too!”

Kat and the two other glowered at Allison and her two allies. Then gathered moved closer to Allison,

“You disgusting little worm! How DARE you threaten us!” Kat snarled.

“I dare LOTS of things - including telling all three of you to your face that you’re CHUMPS for throwing in with Campbell! Especially you, Erika. Didn’t you claim to have founded the Legion? What happened? Campbell stab you in the back and takes over?”

Erika lunged forward, but Allison was ready, she grabbed Erika’s outthrust arms and swung her hard into Katherine, the two went down in a tangle. Agnes Bruckner stared in confusion.

“What’s the matter, Agnes? Need someone to tell you what to do? Is that why you joined the Legion?” Allison asked in a crooning voice.

Agnes stiffened, then attempted to get at Allison by dodging around the still entangled Katherine and Erika. Unfortunately, she telegraphed the move very clearly and she charged right into an Allison Mack sidekick to the jaw. The bewildered rookie reeled back, tripped over her comrades and went down hard.

Allison grinned, “And that’s just a sample of what you’ll get if try anything.”

Erica and Billie then burst into laughter as they exchanged high-fives with Allison and then strolled away.

The three Legion girls got to their feet just in time for Neve Campbell to appear. One look at her face and they dropped to their knees, their heads hanging.

“You disappoint me,” she said softly and the three shuddered. “Get on your feet and get out of my sight!” The three leaped to their feet and started to exit, but Neve grabbed Katherine by the bicep.

“Do not fail me. You understand? DO NOT FAIL ME?” She said all the words in a low tone, but there was a cold menace to the final four.

“Y-yes, Mistress,” Katherine quavered. “I shall not fail you.”

Neve released Katherine bicep and she scuttled away. Neve gave the camera an icy look. Then the lights went out. When they came up, the stage was empty.

It’s early in the morning the day of the 17th CCW event the sun just beginning to rise when Harold Green enters the back stage area. The Promoter likes to get in early and do some internet scouting for future talent, and it’s a lot easier to get work down when the wrestlers are pulling at you every second making demands. Reaching over to turn on the lights Harold jumps and drops the soda as he turns around finding a shadowy figure stepping out right in front of him. The initial shock wears off quickly as he sees the figure is Ashley Scott.

“$5000! What the fuck is this shit?” the blonde demands, not giving Harold any time to compose himself.

Reaching down and picking up the bottle the Promoter’s brain kicks back on and he replies, “Ashley, you Super-kicked a ref. What did you expect would happen?”

Ashley crumpling the paper in her hand she tosses it at the promoter, “That idiot cost me a title shot and worse a lot to that bitch Tricia.”

Harold lets the crumpled paper bounce off his chest he’s more worried about Ashley’s right foot which took out one of his refs already. Taking a step back, maybe not out of range, the promoter says, “Ashley I can’t have my wrestlers abusing my refs, those guys take enough from you in the ring and the fans already.”

Ashley screams, “He screwed me over!”

Harold nods, “OK! There is nothing I can do about that now, but whether Tricia wins or loses against Jessica, I’ll make a match for the two of you to settle this - once and for all.”

Ashley nods and turns to leave looking back over her shoulder she adds, “I’m still not paying that.”

As Ashley slams through one of the doors Harold picks the piece of paper up and heads for his office muttering, “Why do I bother.”

Later Harold sits in his office intently staring at his monitor when some one knocks at the door. Entering are Richard Fannin and Archer. Harold smiles, “I’ve got an opportunity for the two of you.” Rich taking a seat says, “OK, My curiosity is peeked.”

Archer takes the other seat holding an ice pack to his head. Harold asks, “What happen? Not tell me someone jumped you.” He holds up a hand, “No. Michelle and Cam want to show me their new outfits and they just got excited about the title match and...”

Rich adds the sound effects “BAM!”

Archer chuckles, “Yeah.”

After sharing the humor of Team Archer’s tendencies to accidents outside the ring Harold says, “Like I said I have something to ask you two. I find myself in need of chaperones.”

The two begin two smile as Harold explains on, “There are a ton of Female celeb wrestling feds out there, and many of them have made offers to host some of are ladies for travelling shows.”

Rich and Archer sound like Team Archer for a moment as they both answer, “Sure!”

Harold says, “These shows will be CCW productions in the local setting. Your job will be to accompany the wrestlers sent for that show and make sure the local promoters don’t try pulling a fast one on us.”

Catching the credit cards thrown their way by Harold Rich asks, “What do you mean by -Fast ones-“ Harold sitting back down and leaning back says, “Well, I don’t want to send out the girls and find the local celeb is some 250 pound woman. Also the deals are straight forward all matches between women from the two promotions are to be competitive, no one is going to make our ladies take a dive.”

Rich shrugs, “Sounds easy enough.”

Archer asks, “When and where are we going?” Harold pulls out two folders and hands them over saying, “Tickets and contracts are in there, you’re off to Montana. Big Sky Celebrity Wrestling, it will be four CCW matches along with the main event one of theirs against one of ours.”

Rich and Archer flip through the pages reading over the contents when Harold breaks in, “Congrats you’ve just become high price babysitters.”
Match One Bone Slayers vs. Scarlett Johansson-Kaley Cuoco

Emily and Sarah are the first to come to the ring Deschanel is wearing a purple bikini top and matching boy shorts with a white belt. Sarah is in her cammo bikini the color mix is red, black, and brown instead of the normal cammo colors. Scarlett comes out first in a Beige two piece swim suit the blonde waits for her partner at the top of the ramp. Kaley is wearing a white bikini with black letters KC on the right hip together the blondes head to the ring talking and pointing at their opponents.

After being passed over for the tag team title shot it looks like the Bone Slayers are going to take their frustrations out on the blondes. Sarah gets her team started nailing Scarlett with two quick kicks to the gut and a spinning heel kick to the head that sends Scarlett rolling across the ring. Scarlett luckily ends up near her own corner and tags in Kaley, while Sarah also makes a tag trading places with Emily. Emily ducks under Kaley’s attempt at a lock up and getting behind the blonde takes her over with a German suplex. Kaley gets to her feet and turns right into a clothes line form Emily. Emily waits again for Kaley to get to her feet and armdrags the young blonde throwing her into her own corner. Kaley shaking the cobwebs from her head tags in Scarlett. Scarlett doesn’t try to match power with Emily ducking under an attempted clothesline and when Emily turns Scarlett plants a right on the red heads chin the three more before Emily falls.

Scarlett Locks Emily in a Grapevine hold and works the red head top off. Scarlett brings Emily down to her size working the hold and working in breast mauling to add to the effect. Scarlett hair hauls Emily up and drags her to Kaley waiting in their corner. Scarlett reaches out making the tag, but Emily drives an elbow into Scarlett’s ribs breaking free. Emily quickly moves across the ring and makes the tag to Sarah. She starts off well against Kaley, using her fist and kicks to keep the bigger girl in trouble and follows up a kick to the gut with an Impact DDT that gets her a two count.

Sarah hair hauls Kaley up, but Cuoco knock Sarah’s arm away and quickly hits a belly to belly suplex on the smaller blonde. Kaley may have been better off trying to keep her offense going, but she crawls over to make a tag to Scarlett. Sarah with the extra time to recover plays possum and waits for Scarlett to move in close, as Johansson reaches down to pull Sarah up Sarah’s foot shoots up and she kicks Scarlett in the head. Sarah pulls Scarlett up and sends her into the turnbuckles in Sarah and Emily’s corner. Sarah, moving in, drives a shoulder into Scarlett’s gut before reaching for the tag.

Emily still has her arms folded across her boobs covering them as Sarah says, “Don’t tell me you’re shy?”

Emily holds out a hand to take the tag keeping the other arm other her boobs. Sarah laughs, “OK. You shouldn’t be the only topless one here.”

Sarah then removes Scarlett’s top and tosses it to Emily. Getting over her condition Emily moves into the ring and pulls Scarlett out of the corner and drops the blonde over her knee in a backbreaker. Emily hits a series of power moves and waves Sarah into the ring saying, “She’s ready.” Sarah jumps in the ring over the protest of the ref and Kaley. Emily standing behind Scarlett arms around her waist waits for Sarah to begin her super kick and lifts Scarlett. Sarah’s foot hits right on Scarlett’s jaw and Emily completes the German suplex. Scarlett lands on the back of her head and shoulders as Emily bridges while the ref seeing Sarah leaving the ring turns and makes the three count.

Sarah snatches up Emily’s top before the redhead can track it down. Sarah teases her partner with the garment twirling it, “Come on Em, you really need to get use to working without a top.”

Emily arms folded hugging her breast sticks a hand out saying, “Give to me.”

The small blonde starts to extend the top to Emily then flings it into the waiting crowd. Emily looks shocked at her partner, “What the hell did you do that for?” she asks.

Sarah smiling reaches behind her own back and releases the clasp. Taking her own top she sends it flying as well. Emily is looking at Sarah as if the blonde maybe got hit in the head too hard during the match.

Sarah laughs, “Come on Em, It not that bad, and if you let other know it bothers you you’ll never be able to keep it on.”

Emily can’t argue with the experienced blonde lets her arms drop and the two head to the back.
Match Two Lacey Chabert vs. Christina Milian

Lacey Chabert is the first to come to the ring as The Donna’s “Take it Off” plays. Lacey is wearing a dark orange bikini top and boy shorts her long dark hair hangs loose. Lacey maybe be a heel, but she’s a heel many fans like. Lacey tactics usually lead to her opponent missing parts of her outfit and Lacey at times will even remove her own, when apply her breast smother, Lacey is now calling “Girls Night Out.”

When Nelly’s “#1” begins the fans look with interest to see which of the new wrestlers has chosen the song. Christina Milian doesn’t make them wait long running out from behind the curtain. Christina tries to get the fans fired up by waving her arms and yelling, but the hardcore CCW fan based only gives the newcomer some reserved applause. Christina is also wearing her hair loose and is clad in a gold bikini.

Christina wants to show Lacey and the fans she not going to back down from anyone as she meets Lacey mid ring going nose to nose with the woman that was one victory away from being the first XX Division champion. When the match starts Christina show she has some skill as a striker, not some much with her fists, but she drives several knees into Lacey’s gut and once Christina has Lacey bent over the knees find Lacey’s tits as well. Milian even uses the knee strikes to escape from Lacey’s holds. Lacey winded from the constant attach on her abs, still works Christina’s back over with holds, and blows.

Lacey drops Milian in a backbreaker and hair hauls her back up. Lacey pushes Christina back against the ropes and chops Christina’s cleavage twice before Irish whipping Milian across the ring. Lacey follows her a second later and as they come back together after Christina hit the far ropes Lacey leaps taking her down with the Lacey Press. She hammers punches into the side of Christina’s head, then hair-hauls the glassy-eyed woman to her feet and sets her up for the Lacey Bottoms, her version of a Rock Bottom!

Lacey grasps the back of Christina’s bottoms and yanks up, the wedgie digs deep into Christina’s ass. Lacey lifts Milian off the mat and slams her flat on her back. Lacey forgoes hooking the leg, but instead crotch claws Milian while the ref makes the three count ending the match.

Lacey not done kneels over the defeated Christina saying, “I believe you said something about a face to face meeting with the ‘Girls’.”

Lacey undoes her top and straddles Christina’s stomach. Pinning Milian’s arms above her head Lacey lowers her tits on to Christina’s face. Christina’s legs kick wildly for about 30 seconds, Lacey grinds her chest back and forth across Christina’s features. With Milian no longer struggling Lacey lifts up and looks down on Christina’s jug shocked face. Lacey smiles as all of the cameramen are now franticly snapping pictures of her celebration.

Lacey grabs Christina’s top, “The Girls also want to say hi to the ‘Dos Amigas!” She rips Christina’s top off and after fluffing Christina’s boobs Lacey presses her tits into Christina’s. Lacey looks up to make sure the photographers are getting good shots of her tits smashing down on Christina’s. Pushing off Milian, Lacey says, “Welcome to the big time rookie!”

Lacey winces in pain as she bends over to leave the ring, but she’s leaving the winner again. Christina coming out of the jug shock makes her way to the backstage area quickly.
Match Three: Kristanna Loken vs. Charlize Theron

‘The Golden Goddess’ - Charlize Theron - comes out wearing her gold thong bikini accompanied by the familiar ‘Legs’ by ZZ-TOP. Charlize ignored most of the fans, but as usual paused to chat up her erstwhile supporter Kim before climbing into the ring to await her opponent.

Kristanna 'The Terminator' Loken comes out in an all-black, two-piece to Drowning Pool’s ‘Bodies.’ Loken climbs into the ring and stares at Theron who, seeing her coming, moves out to meet her. The two blondes - who are tag team partners in the “All The Marbles” league - go chest-to-chest (if you’ll pardon the expression in the casse of women who, between them, couldn’t fill Pam Anderson’s bra if you used all four of their boobs!)

The ref tries to separate them, but they refuse to back down and finally, giving up, he calls for the bell! The two big blondes give their fans several ‘ooh and aah’ moments - in addition to the obligatory ‘holy shit’ ones! Theron is quicker, more nimble than Loken and she uses her speed early to avoid close combat with hit and run tactics such as striking and scooting away, and uses the ropes to give her added impetus as she flings herself into them and rebounds with a series of Clotheslines, Forearm Smashes and when Loken gets close, Theron resorts to Snap Kicks and even tripping to elude the groping big blonde.

But Loken is the bigger and stronger of the two and Theron can’t run forever and stay inside the ring. Loken puts her power to good use whenever she can corner Charlize and after a particularly strong Body Slam, Kristanna scoops Theron up and carries Charlize around the ring holding her aloft in a Military Press before Powerslamming her with ‘ring rattling’ force!

A few seconds later, it’s Charlize’s turn to show some muscles as she holds Loken at the top of a Suplex for over twenty seconds before falling back to finish the move! Fans swear the ring is going to collapse as the two big blondes then take turns whipping each into the corner turnbuckles so hard at least two ring posts were jostled loose in their fittings!

Late in the match, it’s Loken who gains control, wearing down her fellow blonde with a series of breast-bouncing Chops that drive Charlize stutter-stepping back across the ring until her back hits the ropes. Loken kicks Charlize low in the belly and as she folds like a wet washcloth, Loken hooks her arms, lifts her upside down and then…

BLAM! Powers Charlize Theron face (and tits) first into the mat!!

The ring announcer is just calling, “Two minutes left!” as Kristanna hair-hauls Charlize up for a Sidewalk Slam and taunts her tag partner, “You’re done, you weak little wimp!”

WHAM! She hits the Sidewalk Slam and Theron looks done! Again, a handful of hair brings Theron upright and Loken pulls Charlize’s left arm up, folds it behind her head and traps it there as she reachs around to tug Charlize’s bikini cup up to expose her left breast! She winds up and…

SPLATTT! The hollow sound of Loken’s clenched fist echoes in the hushed arena as she drives it deep into the soft mound.

The punch gets a sympathetic (grasp) from Theron’s fans - and a pained groan from Charlize - who still manages to stay on her feet although she staggers to the ropes where she drapes her left arm over the top strand as, teary-eyed, she gently gives her hurting hooter a tender mammary massage in a vain attempt to make the pain go away!

Charlize’s expression says she’s probably not sure where she is or why she’s in so much pain, so it’s no surprise she doesn’t react when Kristanna sweeps in and pulls her bikini top up and over her head, whipping it off with a fluorish that gets a huge pop from the fans of the ‘modestly endowed’ Oscar winner!

Kris tossed Char’s gold top to Kim sitting in the front row, “Here’s a keepsake from Char’s last match...EVER!”

Then Loken turns and races to the far ropes, heaves herself into them and as she rebounds back across the ring and nears Charlize, she raises her right leg to give Charlize a Big Boot to the head.

But as Loken begins her final lunge, Theron drops straight down on her butt and Loken’s leg flies over the top rope, leaving her hung up with her right leg drangling over the top rope as her arms windmill trying to keep her balance.

Theron, recovering, is in Loken’s blind spot and Kristanna never sees Charlize’s fist come powering straight up into her crotch - although she feels it! The Low Blow nails Loken’s exposed pussy and she lets out a squeal of pain as she tumbled backward into the ring where she lay with both hands wedged firmly between her drawn up thighs!

Charlize got to her knees and threw herself on the incapacitated blonde as the referee scrambled into position, checked Loken’s shoulders and began slapping the mat...


Charlize, hurting and out of breath, forgoes the usual post-match antics - satisfied just to have her arm raised - then she heads out of the ring. But before she leaves the arena, the ‘Golden Goddess’ stops at Kim’s seat long enough to autograph her sweat-soaked bikini top for the adoring Kim as Kim’s ‘significant other’ - Ginny - looks on darkly.

Match Four: The Simpson Sisters vs. “Colombian Crush”

Jessica Simpson’s ‘These Boots’ is playing as Jessica leads her younger sisterAshlee out thru the curtain. Jess is wearing her ‘Dukes Of Hazzard’ pink bikini while Ashlee is in a white version of the same model. The sisters shake the hands with fans who offer but most fans reaction seems to be decidedly hostile to the the Simpson’s. Jessica leads Ashlee to the corner where they continue to warm up while awaiting their opponents.

Trick Daddy’s ‘Let’s Go’ begins and bursting out of the back come “Colombian Crush” aka Sofia Vergara and Shakira! The Colombian duo receives a LOT more support than the Simpson’s as they make their way to the ring. Colombian Crush is in matching outfits, red bikini tops and black short-shorts. As she joins Sofia in the ring, Shakira gives her talented hips several shakes and the fans erupt in wild, enthusiastic approval.

Seeing the smaller Shakira is in the ring, young Ashlee starts for the sisters and she immediately runs into trouble, unable to keep up with the quicker, more agile, Shakira. The Colombian cutie makes Ashlee appear slow and lumbering to the point Ashlee finally gives up chasing Shakira and begins to counter wrestle: letting the quicker Shakira strike, then uses her closeness to hit moves.

The tactic pays off and Ashlee makes the small blonde pay every time she moves within her reach. Shakira is still moving in and out, trying to keep Ashlee off balance but Ashlee eventually gets both hands on Shakira’s hips as she’s coming in and she nails the Colombian with a Flapjack!

After her chest bounces off the canvas, Shakira gets to all fours and scrambles hurriedly to her corner where she tags Sofia. Jessica is screaming for a tag from Ashlee but she’s reluctant to give up the spotlight but as Sofia closes in on her, Ashlee realizes that the several minutes she spent chasing Shakira has winded her so, reconsidering, she tags her smaller sister.

Sofia steps back, wanting to let Jessica climb into the ring as much (if not more) as Jessica wants in. Jessica and Sofia prove the shortest distance between two points is a straight line as they slam together at center ring. Sofia strikes first, hammering a Forearm Smash to Jessica’s hulking cleavage that pounds her prodigious puppies flat! Jessica fires back with a rack rattling Forearm to Sofia’s jugs.

After recoiling and resetting her feet, Sofia and Jessica resume where they left off the last time in the ring together! Every attack targets the other’s proud chest and it’s not until she gets a “blind tag” from Shakira that Sofia leaves the ring.

Sofia is running across the ring when Shakira tags her and she doesn’t realize Shakira is even in the ring so Sofia lines Jessica up for a Breast Bashing Clothesline…but the brilliant mind of the nimble blonde easily deduces Shakira’s plan and when she ducks, Shakira gets crushed instead!

Sore and rack-weary, Jessica staggers over to tag Ashlee while the referee struggles to push Sofia out of the ring when instead of leaving the ring, she returns to join Shakira for a little “Jessica Puppy Punishment.”

Ashlee is hair hauling Shakira to her feet when the ref returns - in time to see her Butterfly Lock Shakira’s arms. She lifts and flips Shakira over, bringing her crashing to the mat in a Powerbomb that takes the last ounce of resistance from the tough little Colombian Cutie!

Shakira is in no shape to resist as Ashlee quickly Matchbooks her mid-ring, then flops across her folded legs, draping her arm over Shakira’s “in the air ass” while the referee ends the match with three loud slaps of the mat!
Match Five: Erica Durance vs. Estella Warren

Fans know Future Leaders of the world “Let me out” belongs to Erica Durance as she comes out a few seconds after the music begins. Erica is dressed in red top with black bottoms with a red and black belt. Erica is very no nonsense coming to the ring. She still gives a nod to the fans, but tonight she seems all business as she enters the ring. “Bulls on Parade” by Rage against the Machine begins playing, the song goes on for a good bit before Estella does make her way out. Some fans don’t realize but the two Canadians have a long history, some say that goes back to high school in Canada where the two first battled.

Estella gets Erica in a headlock early in the match and snaps her over on to the canvas. Estella may realize its way too early in the match for such a move, but she still sticks her breast in Erica’s face trying to smother Durance out. Erica escapes and takes Estella to the mat and locks on a figure four head scissors. Erica gives up the submission hold the focus on some higher impact move, Erica Belly-to-Back Suplexes Estella, then hits a Backbreaker before going for the cover. She gets a two count before Estella gets right back in control with a Low Blow that stops Erica in her tracks!

Estella Body Slams, then Hip Tosses, Erica, then brings her back to her feet as soon as her body hits the canvas. Estella sets Erica up for an Irish Whip across the ring but despite all the damage done to her, Erica ducks Estella’s Clothesline and when Estella comes rebounding back off the ropes, Durance is ready for her…

After hitting a foot to the gut, Erica pulls Estella back up, but just so she can Piledrive her right back down! Erica lifts Estella by the shoulder straps of her suit and sends her to the ropes, then drops her hips as Estella rebounds! She lifts Warren onto her shoulders before falling back with a Samoan Drop!

Estella seems unaware of Erica lifting her and applying a Sleeper as Erica forces Estella down and captures her torso between her legs. It looks like Estella is gonna end the match unconscious, but NO!!! Her hand begins frantically slapping the mat, she’s submitting! Erica looks like she’s inclined to ignore the submission and is forcing Estella to black out - then suddenly, at the referee’s urging, she releases the hold and pushes herself off the defeated blonde to get her arm raised in victory.
Match Six: Keira Knightley vs. Kirsten Dunst

Green Day’s ‘She’s A Rebel’ introduces Keira Knightley as usual. Keira is wearing a white bikini with black shoulder straps and piping. Kirsten Dunst comes out to Metallica’s “Fuel” the blonde clad in a sunny yellow bikini. Both young women are in desperate need of a win in this match, if they what to stay on the roster. In the ring the two women stare across the ring at each other and grow anxious to get the match started. The ref calls for the bell giving the two wrestlers their chance.

Kirsten goes on the offensive first taking Keira to the canvas and applying a figure four head scissors. Keira is able to turn into the hold and works her head free and pops on top of Kirsten seizing her in a headlock. Keira controls the match with her striking ability, Kirsten has several red welts covering her body and her face is beginning to look puffy as the Brit continues to work her over.

Knightley pushes Dunst into the corner and lifts the rubbery legged woman to a seat on the top turnbuckle. She gives Kirsten another shot to head, then backs up to mid-ring before she charges into the corner and does a handstand! With her legs in the air, Keira’s ankles wrap around Dunst’s head, then as she tumbles to the mat, Keira’s legs flip Dunst headlong off her perch!

Kirsten is barely moving after her body hits the canvas - hard! Keira scrambles over and locks the blonde up in a tight cradle as the ref, forced to jump over the two wrestlers, finally gets in position to make the three count.

Things go from bad to worst for Kirsten - because Keira isn’t done! First, she strips the blonde’s yellow bikini, then walks to the ring ropes and tosses it into the sea of groping, pleading arms waving to get her attention her. Then she returns to Kirsten and takes a victory ride on the blonde’s face, taking out her frustrations!

Kirsten finally leaves the spread-eagled, shiny-faced, blonde and heads to the back, still not happy with what has been by any measure, a truly dominating victory!
Match Seven: Jessica Alba vs. Olivia Munn

Soils ‘Halo’ beings as Jessica Alba breaks through the curtain wearing a pale blue bikini. She has a large following of fans and she takes her time getting to the ring, stopping to slap every hand offered to her. When she reaches the ring, Jess climbs each turnbuckle and waves to the fans.

Limp Bizkit’s ‘My Way’ replaces Jessica’s music as Olivia Munn runs out onto the stage in a simple black bikini. Munn doesn’t have as many fans as Alba, but they make noise for this attractive brunette. Olivia enters the ring and moves directly to her corner where she bows her head as if meditating while she waits for the bell.

Things start slow as Olivia and Jessica feel each other out, lock up and then back off, neither able to get a clear advantage and both too cautious by half. Olivia eventually gets the action going with an Armdrag take down and she goes directly into an Armbar. Olivia moves from the Armbar into a hammer lock, and then applies a full nelson on Jessica and tries grinding Alba into the canvas. Olivia pulls Jessica up, but a back elbow to the gut springs Jessica free. Jessica back way from Munn trying to buy time to recover, but Olivia isn’t willing to let her handy work go for nothing charges Jessica.

Jessica drops quickly as Olivia approaches and hits a drop toe hold. Unluckily for Olivia she is very close to the corner and instead of falling face first into mat she hits chest first against the top turnbuckle. Jessica nips up and holding the top rope for balance begins kick away at the broadest part of Olivia’s back; five kicks; each with a deep resounding THUD!

Jessica drops to her knees behind Olivia, firing her arm up between her legs THWAK! Olivia groans as her knees buckle, but Alba immediately grabs the front of Olivia’s suit and pulls her over, rolling her up in a tight Matchbook Pin.

The ref gets a two count before Olivia is able to kick out!

Jessica rolls Olivia onto her back, standing beside her with her back toward Munn, then Jessica leaps into a back flip and comes crashing down across Olivia’s chest. Jessica hooks one leg with one hand, the other slapping the mat as she counts with the ref.

At two and a half, Olivia is able to kick out!

Jessica looks pissed and yells, “When a star like me pins a nobody like you…” Jessica hammers a Forearm down into Olivia’s boobs. “…stay DOWN!”

Jessica hair-hauls Olivia up, scoops the brunette up and grabbing a rough handful of Olivia’s gluteus, carries Olivia to a spot she likes before she Body Slams Munn!. Jessica climbs the nearby turnbuckle where she poses with arms high before she leaps. Jessica draws her knees to her chest, then straightens them again, going for a Frog Splash. The perfect move is ruined when Olivia pulls her own knees up and lets Alba impale herself on her knees.

Jessica makes a sound like her lunch is about to come back up as she rolls back and forth holding her stomach. Olivia pushes herself up and uses a handful of Jessica’s hair to pull her head into a Standing Head Scissors. She lifts Jessica into Piledriver position and holds her upside down as she reaches between Jessica’s legs and grabs her crotch.

Olivia holds the move longer than normal, letting her fingers dig deep into Jessica’s sensitive flesh making the young brunette scream! Jessica’s cries come to an abrupt end when her head is driven into the unforgiving canvas! Olivia flops Jessica over on her back and hooks her leg for an easy three count!

Olivia stands over Jessica, then leans down to hook the thin piece of cloth between Jessica’s rapidly heaving boobs. Olivia slaps Jessica, and as she moans and starts to come around, tells her, “Hey big star! Enjoy your topless walk to the back!”

She rips off Jessica’s top and takes it with her as she leaves the ring. Jessica’s arms hurriedly criss-cross her bare breasts and although it’s far from the first time Alba’s been topless for a wrestling crowd…she doesn’t like showing her ‘stuff’ in a loss!
Match Eight: Jennifer Love Hewitt vs. Neve Campbell (aka The Banshee)

When Maroon 5’s ‘This Love’ begins to play fans turn to the stage and the first thing they see as Love pushes her way thru the curtain is that Jen looks a lot more somber than usual. She’s sporting an electric blue swimsuit with JLH in white on the hip. Jen, normally playful with the crowd, keeps her head down as she heads straight to the ring, ignoring the fans. She climbs the steps and goes directly to her corner to wait for Neve.

Carl Orff’s ‘Carmine Burana’ (The Legion Theme) begins to play, then switches to Sound Garden’s ‘Black Hole Sun’ as five hooded figures walk onto the stage. Jen is obviously worried as all five throw back their hoods revealing themselves.

Neve steps forward, then turns to face the others and tells them, “Wait for me.”

The four turn and walk away as Neve hands her robe to Agnes, the last in line. Neve is wearing her customary black bikini as she turns and heads to the ring. The two former friends stare across the ring at each other and neither says a word.

Fans and Neve are surprised that it’s Jen who takes control of the match early-on, beating Neve with her quickness. Love takes Neve to the mat with wrestling take downs and tries working on those long, strong legs. Hoping to build on her momentum, Jen hair-hauls Neve back up and hammers a series of Forearm Smashes to Neve’s full, firm chest. Jen scoops Neve up without effort, then Bodyslams her back to the canvas where she drops an Elbow to the chest before going into a cover - only getting a two count before Neve kicks out!

Love jerks Neve up by the shoulder straps but she takes too long setting up her next move and Neve suddenly reverses with a Snap Belly-to-Belly Suplex that leaves Love winded and flat on her back!

Neve scoops Love up across her chest, then drops her over her thigh in a Backbreaker, her clenched fists digging into her flawless flesh as Neve’s hands press down, cruelly grinding into Love’s crotch and her right breast as Neve slowly forces Jen’s lush body to bend further and further.

When she’s done, Neve tosses Jen off her knee and stomps her back just above her butt, then stomps her way clear up Jen’s spine to her shoulders! Neve begins methodically taking Jen apart with a series of devastating moves: Neckbreaker; Piledriver; German Suplex; then a second Suplex!

Jen lays twisted in pain on the canvas for several moments before she struggles to all fours, unable to regain her feet. A boot in the ass sends Jen sprawling on her chest back down on the canvas. Neve takes a seat beside Jen, trapping Jen’s near arm between her legs, then hooks her arms around Love’s chin and rears back on the Crippler Crossface that Neve has dubbed, ‘The Banshee’s Scream.’

Jen’s free hand quickly begins slapping the mat and the ref quickly calls for the bell but Neve refuses to release her and Jen’s screams of pain slowly change to sobs of frustration until…finally…her big eyelashes flutter and she passes out. Only then does Neve release the hold after the ref has to threaten to disqualify her and reverse the submission.

Neve stares down the ref, then turns back to Jen’s unconscious, nubile body and laugh, “You’re really going through outfits.”

Indeed, Neve strips Jen down to her birthday suit, then slaps her around and tells her, “NEVEr think you’re my equal! I carried you all those years.” Most of the crowd cheers when Allison Mack comes running out of the back on an apparent rescue mission. Neve seems ready to take the blonde head on, but at the last second she rolls out of the ring on one side just as Allison climbs in the other.

Neve grabs the title belt off the scorer’s table and struts away, but turning to points at Allison and growl, “Your time is up!”

Allison starts after Neve, but the ref grabs her and asks her help in getting Jen covered up so she can be helped out of the ring. Allison puts her robe around Jen’s nude body, then supports her with her arm around her waist and her hand under her far breast. Jen, still too out of it to walk, stumbles as she slumps against Allison who is grinning as she cops a feel or two helping the ‘sweet young thing’ back her dressing room.
Cut Scene Two

As Velvet Revolver’s ‘Slither’ begins playing, fans know it’s time for a visit from the Champ. Jessica Biel comes out wearing jeans and a white tank top with the belt tossed over her shoulder. Several times she asks fans on her way to the ring, “Looks good there, doesn’t it?” patting the belt against her bosom. Once in the ring, Jess takes the mic but has to wait for her sea of fans to settle down before she can speak. One goes about 15 seconds longer than the rest until, smiling, Jessica looks directly at the fan and asks him to, “Quiet down!”

Finally, she raises the mic and says, “Tricia Helfer is the next ‘blonde of the moment.’ Lemme see, first it was Kristanna Loken...aka Blondefoot! Then came ‘blonde jugs’….aka Katherine ‘Pussy Cat’ Heigl. Then there was Rosario Dawson...OK, well…she’s not blonde right now but she WAS at some point…musta been, hell every woman is at one time or another.”

She chuckled as she continue, “Now it’s a ‘serious blonde’...” she pauses to ponder for a second. “…I’m sure that’s an oxymoron…” She lifts the belt from her shoulder and holds it high. “They all FAILED!”

The lights in the small arena dim and a red dot appears on the giant screen and begins traveling from one side of the screen to the other leaving a faint line behind it and a low humming noise is heard. The area is mostly dark now and two red dots flash just before the lights come up and Tricia is standing center stage giving the illusion that the two dots came from her own eyes.

Tricia is wearing a skintight red dress that shows every curve of the blonde’s magnificent body. In her hand is a mic. “This is where the challenger usually comes and lays you out, isn’t Jess?” Helfer starts with the question. Continuing, “Well that’s not going to happen tonight. I’m just here to let you know your time as champ is coming to an end.” Jessica looks perturbed at the interruption, but allows Tricia to finish, “You’ve never faced anyone like me. The countdown has begun…your reign is OVER!”

She throws the mic down, turns around and disappears thru the curtain into the back. Jessica stalks back and forth in the ring as if hoping Helfer will return to have a physical confrontation but after waiting a few moments more, Jessica gives up and tosses her mic aside and follows Helfer to the back.
Match Nine (Tag Title): Team Archer (Belle-Trachtenberg) vs. Eva’s of Destruction (Longoria-Mendes)

The Tag Team titles are up for grabs next as Team Archer comes out to Twisted Sister’s ‘We’re Not Going to Take It’ in their new outfits; light blue top and dark blue bottom for Camilla Belle with a light blue “T.A.” across the seat. Michelle Trachtenberg is in a dark blue top with light blue bottom with a dark blue lettered “T.A” across the seat.

Then warning sirens blare as lights flash around the arena and Sean Paul’s ‘Temperature’ heralds the arrival from opposite sides of the stage of ‘The Eva’s of Destruction’ - Eve Mendes and Eva Longoria. Both are wearing a red bikini top and black bottom cut high on the hips. Mendes stops to tell Archer, “I hope you didn’t spend a lot of money on those bikini’s because they’re going home with US!” Longoria chimes in, “And by the look of ‘em, he didn’t spend much!!”

Team Archer drops down out of the ring to come to the aid of their mentor and the ref, seeing trouble brewing, jumps down to get between the two teams. Fans boo the ref for getting involved, although he manages to get the four women into the ring in time for the opening bell.

The match begins with Michelle and Longoria and although each team tries several combinations, neither can gain any advantage. Michelle nearly takes Longoria’s head off with a Spin Kick, then after a tag, Mendes Atomic Drops Michelle. Camilla hits an Inverted Lung Blower on Mendes but Longoria repays that when she Drop Kicks the kneeling Camilla square in the breasts!

All four wrestlers are taking a beating as well as dishing one out. Mendes has to step in to save Longoria after Michelle pins her, then a short time later it’s Camilla who saves Michelle when Mendes has her pinned. Although the pace is uneven due to numerous tags, both teams are near flawless in their team work and it keeps the match very even.

Team Archer finally traps Mendes in their corner of the ring and the younger ladies try to put Eva away. Michelle tags in Camilla then takes off for the far ropes while Camilla backs to the near ropes and charges at the same time. Eva, staggering to her corner, seems unaware of either as both of the Team Archer members leave their feet simultaneously hoping to crush Eva between them.

All Camilla and Michelle’s teamwork and timing come to an ignominious end when Eva ‘falls’ just as Camilla and Michelle arrive! The teammates crash together belly-to-belly with Michelle knocked clear out of the ring while Camilla falls backward, writhing and rocking back and forth holding her stomach.

Mendes, holding her hand out and yells to her partner,, “Come on! E-squared!”

Longoria makes the tag, then together they haul Camilla to her feet standing on either side of her. They place her arms behind their heads, then reach down and link their other arm behind her knees. Lifting her, the Eva’s flip Camilla upside down, then pull her legs downward. Camilla’s chin buries in her own cleavage as her spread legs expose her blue clad crotch and the TA on her backside.

Holding the brunette inverted, the Eva’s wait until the blood rushes to Camilla’s head before they drive Belle straight down headfirst into the canvas! The E-Squared move ends with Belle’s head being slammed hard on the mat. Longoria drags Camilla over onto her back by the brunette’s bikini bottom, then casually covers the barely concussions blond,


The Champs retain the title and demonstrate to the crowd they are the dominate tag team! Tonight is the Eva’s turn to claim their prize but Michelle has recovered and returns to the ring under the bottom rope carrying a folding metal chair to make sure the Eva’s don’t strip her partner Camilla.

“You aren’t getting these outfits,” screams Trachtenberg as she brandishes the chair to back the Eva’s off.

Longoria is determined to claim their prize but Mendes finally manages to pull her partner away, telling her, “Let ‘em keep ‘em…for now. We’ll have another chance to get ‘em later…and we will!” Grumbling, Longoria accedes to her partner and the champs head to the back as Michelle goes to check on Camilla who hasn’t moved since her head hit the canvas.
Main Event: Allison Mack vs. Katherine Heigl

The ring announcer standing in the center of the ring begins, “She’s from Los Angeles CA...she stands 5’5”...she is the first ever XX Division Champion...she is ALLISON MACK!” Shinedown’s ‘Fly from the Inside’ begins as sparklers rain down on the stage as Allison makes her way from behind the curtain clad in a maroon low-cut sports bra and spandex short-shorts. She stops at the top of the ramp to wave her arms, calling on the crowd to make even more noise. She slaps hands with those at the railing, then stops and reads Richard Fannin’s sign which reads, “Bitch Slap KAT!”

As she turns to go, Rich yells, “Hey!” to get her attention, then flips his sign over. The back reads, “There’s more than 1 way to skin a KAT.”

Chuckling, Allison climbs the stairs and steps into the ring where she climbs each turnbuckle, tapping her heart and raising her arms. After she climbs down from the final turnbuckle Allison’s face changes the smile is gone replaced by determination. The lights in the arena dim and smoke covers the stage.

“Hailing from Washington, DC and standing an impressive 5’8”...she’s the enforcer for The Legion...she calls herself the Kat…KATHERINE HEIGL!”

A few bars of Carl Orff’s ‘Carmina Burana’ plays before the music changes to Marilyn Manson’s ‘Sweet Dreams’ and Kat appears wearing a hooded robe with the hood hiding her face. Fortunately for the fans, the front is wide open to put Kat’s very impressive assets on full display. She’s clad in black from head to toe; black top and black boy-cut shorts. She loses the robes halfway down the ramp and now the fans who are booing get a look of disdain from the icy blonde as she slowly walks to the ring. Kat climbs the steps slowly, pausing on each to survey the arena as if looking for trouble.

Once she’s in the ring, the ref calls the ladies forward - and both refuse!

Kat says, “Just ring the bell and get outta my way.”

Allison, not taking her eyes off Kat, doesn’t speak at all, but drops into her wrestling stance ready to begin. The ref shrugs, calls for the bell and quickly steps back giving the two blondes plenty of room.

As Allison moves forward, she asks, “Wasn’t that your pudgy belly I speared in the battle royal?”

They chest into each other and Allison has to look up at Kat who smugly says, “Well, I damn sure won THAT match-up!”

Allison nods, “Yeah, you benefited from Erica’s actions.” Pausing, she adds, “So how did that work out for you? Oh yeah… Biel kicked your FAT ASS,” she chuckled, knowing that would push Kat into action.

The bigger blonde let out a loud roar but Allison easily ducked the wild swing and got behind Kat, tackling Heigl by hitting her in the back of the legs and taking her to the mat on her stomach. Allison slithered up the back of Katherine’s legs and looped her hands around Heigl’s waist. Squeezing Kat’s mid-section rewarded Allison with a grunt of pain, but Kat pushed up to all fours and then to her feet - with Allison hanging on her back!

Katherine grunts and loses a little more air every time Allison digs her locked hands into her belly. Kat grabs Allison’s wrists and pushes then down around her hips to spread Allison’s hands further apart. Once free of the Waistlock, Kat snaps her hips forward, then drives her butt backward into Allison’s stomach!

Kat can feel the air rush out of Allison’s mouth on her back as she repeats the Butt Blast, keeping Allison winded. When Kat releases Allison’s wrists, she breaks free and takes off for the ropes, turning to hit the ropes with her back, Kat is propelled back toward Allison and she drives a Big Boot right into the deep valley between Allison’s heaving tits.

Kat reaches down and hair-hauls Allison back up, warning her, “You shoulda been more respectful at the promo. I’m not just following Banshee’s orders now, I REALLY want to punish you!”

Allison’s quick wit may get her in trouble as she says, “Punish me? What, you’re gonna make me watch ‘Grey’s ‘Fuckin’ Anatomy’? That’s cruel and unusual!”

Kat slaps Allison, screaming, “I’m gonna beat respect and fear of the Legion into you!”

Kat reaches up between Allison legs and grabs a rude handful of butt cheek as she scoops Allison up, holding her in a stall before rising onto the balls of her feet and tosses Allison over! As the Body Slam finishes, Allison’s back SMACKs the canvas, knocking the wind out of her. Kat stands over Allison, flexes, then adjust her top, working her tits until she’s pleased with the cleavage. She finally notices Allison has crawled away and is getting back to her feet.

Stalking after Allison, Kat says, “Now you know what’s its like to be hit by a reaAAARRGHH!”

Allison hammers a Forearm Smash into Kat’s newly adjusted cleavage, then grabs Kat’s wrist to keep her from getting away as she ducks and pulls her into a Fireman’s Carry. She parades around the ring with Kat over her shoulder, mimicking spanking Kat’s up-turned ass, but being careful not to actually touch her butt so as not to inflame her any more! Then Allison dumps Kat on the mat, but hangs onto Kat’s left arm in an Armbar and drives her knee into Katherine’s ribs.

“Kat, let’s face it,” Allison huffs. “You’re nothing but a goon, so don’t talk about respect to me!”

Kat rolls to her knees and hisses, “You’re just guaranteeing you don’t walk out of this ring in one piece.”

Allison hammers down on Kat’s trapped arm with her elbow, then replies, “I’ll be DANCING outta the ring - and well on the way to getting my belt back!”

She pushes her right elbow into Kat’s triceps as she pulls back on her forearm with her left, forcing Kat to bow down with her face on the mat. Going back to back with Kat, Allison pulls on the trapped limb until Kat lets out a pained scream.

Satisfied, Allison releases the arm, stands up, and says, “That’s enough of that; I don’t want you quitting too soon.”

Still hanging onto Kat’s wrist, Allison hauls her up but using more strength than Allison thought the damaged limb had in it, Kat reverses and twists Allison into a Hammerlock. Keeping Allison’s left arm trapped behind her back, Kat turns Allison around so they’re facing each other, then snarls, “THIS’S how you work a limb!”

Scooping the smaller blonde off her feet, Kat Bodyslams Allison with her arm still behind her back. Kat reaches down, pulling Allison’s left arm out from under her and growls, “Here’s another lesson! Once you start on a body part, stay with it.”

She lays Allison’s arm flat on the mat, stands on the wrist and STOMPs the blonde’s bicep. Allison cries out, sitting up and cradling her injured arm when Kat steps off her wrist. But Kat grabs Allison by the shoulder straps and jerks her to her feet, then leads Mack into a corner and reminds her, “Remember…stay on that same body part.”

Kat shoves Allison’s left shoulder into the top turnbuckle and her face contorts in pain as Heigl turns Mack’s back against the corner and leans in to whisper, “Banshee will probably mount this arm on her trophy wall when I’m done.”

Kat wraps Allison’s left arm over the top rope, then reaches thru middle and pulls Allison’s arm back between the top and middle into the ring.

“Let go!” Allison screams as the top rope digs into her already sore bicep.

The ref steps in, warning Kat out of the corner, and starts his five count. Katherine releases the hold stepping back and kicks the top rope, Allison gasps in pain and sags in the corner, a few seconds later she gently freeing her arm. Kat waits in the center of the ring, again adjusting her top which draws most of the fans attention and most don’t even see Allison push out of the corner with her left arm hanging limp at her side.

Kat flexes smugly saying, “Now you know why you hide in that little girls division.”

Allison gets a look of disgusted on her face and lashes out with a kick to the gut that doubles Kat over. Allison wasting no time steps forward, hooking her arm around Kat’s neck and then sits straight down, planting Kat’s head in the mat with a DDT!

Allison uses her right arm to roll Kat to her back saying, “I’ll be OK after I win the world title.” She flops across Kat’s big, soft, jugs and hooks a leg as best she can with her good arm.

ONE...TWO...No! Kat kicks out, tossing Allison off of her like shedding a coat. Kat shakes her head to clear the cobwebs while Allison flexes her left arm, trying to get some use out of it.

Both women roll back up to their feet and take on last inventory of the damage they’ve sustained. Kat wants to tie up with Allison in a Collar and Elbow, but Mack ducks Kat’s extended arms and comes up at her right side. Kat has no chance to recover when Allison quickly lifts the bigger blonde into another Fireman’s Carry, and this time she turns and squats, then pushes up and tosses Kat backward off her shoulders.

WHAM! Kat lands flat on her back with the air rushing out of her lungs. Allison hair-hauls Kat to a sitting position, then sits behind her, scooting in to press her belly into Kat’s back. She wraps both legs around Kat’s waist, then rolls Heigl to one side to hook Kat in a make-shift Abdominal Stretch. Allison keeps her sore left arm away from the hold as she tries to stretch and squeeze the fight out of The Legion enforcer’s seemingly soft mid-section.

Katherine grits her teeth, “This isn’t going to get a win for you…when I get out…I’m gonna make it so much worse for you.”

Allison hardly paying attention to the threat says, “Bad news Kat...”

SMACK!! “AAAAHHH!” Allison’s left hand slaps Katherine’s taut tummy.

Smiling, Allison says, “My arm’s feeling better.”

The red hand print lights up Kat’s pale abs. Given the break, Allison flexes her left arm and seems happy so she unhooks her ankles and pulls Kat to her feet. She backs Kat to the ropes, then grabs her arm and Irish Whips Kat across the ring…or at least she tried to!! Kat grabbed the top rope and when Allison got jerked to a stop and turned back, she droves a Kneelift into Kat’s gut.

Again, Allison tried to Whip Kat across the ring but, once again, Heigl refuses to budge! Allison again swings around - but this time she runs right into a Lariat from Kat that plants Allison flat on her back, her eyes unfocused.

Kat takes several deep breaths before stepping back to Allison and pulling her up by the shoulder straps. With an evil smile on her face, Kat rams her knee up into the front of Allison’s shorts. Gagging, Allison has to be held up in Heigl’s strong grip or she’d have fallen. Kat taunts, “Banshee said to leave a little piece of you, but who’s to say what ‘little’ really means?”

Kat’s hands slide up Allison’s shoulders and encircle her neck. The ref steps in as she blatantly chokes Allison, beginning to count for a DQ. At “Four” Kat lifts her hands overhead and smiles at the ref while Allison drops to her knees gasping for air. Heigl again seems to have the spark of evil genius hit her as she reaches out, grabs the top of Allison’s head and pulls her head back as she steps over the kneeling woman’s shoulders into a Reverse Standing Headscissors.

Kat pulls Allison’s hair to force her nose into hard, intimate, contact with Heigl’s sweaty bottom as Kat wiggles her hips and bounces to make Allison suffer even more. Twice Kat stops long enough to pull Allison’s face back into contact with her crotch and each time the ref asks if she wants to give up. Each time, he only gets a muffed, “Nunnnh” in reply. Allison finally finds an escape route as she brings her arms up, pushing into Kat’s stomach as she leans forward. The effect is a Kneeling Powerbomb as Kat’s legs fold over Allison’s shoulders.

Red-faced and dripping sweat, Allison takes her first clean breaths in nearly a minute while Kat lays starfished momentarily, then rolls into a curl, her arms behind her head. Allison crawls up Kat’s legs and goes for a cover, but only gets a two count.

After the kickout, Kat is facedown on the mat with Allison not far away. Kat, on her back, is trying to catch a second wind and so Allison is the first up. She catches Kat as she’s just starting to rise and wraps her arms around Heigl’s waist, then hits a Gut Wrench Suplex.

Allison gets to one knee and points to Richard Fannin, then without a word pulls Kat o her feet and reaches back, turns her shoulders and Bitch Slaps the taste right outta Kat’s mouth. Her head snaps to the side and she staggers a few steps before her knees unhinge and she crumples to the mat where Allison spends the next fifteen seconds stomping and kicking her body.

Allison goes out of character a bit, heading to the turnbuckles and climbing. She doesn’t wait long before leaping as if diving into a pool. Her body lands with a CRASH on Kat’s torso, smashing her big tits flat! Allison doesn’t hook Kat’s legs for the pin - and it costs her! Kat kicks out at two and half.

Allison stays focused on Kat, hair-hauling the blonde up and again backing her to the ropes. Allison drags Kat off the ropes to Irish Whip the big blonde across the ring, but as Allison releases her grip, Kat grabs Allison’s wrist, raises her arm and plays ‘crack the whip’ with the already damaged limb!

Allison screams in pain as and whatever recovery her arm had managed was undone! Still holding Allison’s wrist, Kat pulls her to her feet and lifts Allison’s arm, then spins Allison around, Hammerlocking her left arm behind her. Kat lifts Allison but instead of simply Bodyslamming her, Kat tosses Allison over her shoulder, then walks around the ring taunting Allison.

“Is it sinking in, yet? You’re done!” Kat the drops Allison’s left shoulder onto her posted leg with a Shoulder Breaker and even stoic Allison can’t keep the cry of pain from escaping her lips. Kat cockily lowers her tits onto Allison’s face as she goes for the Tit Smother cover. The ref gets a two count, but Allison kicks out of the cocky pin attempt.

Laughing, Kat says, “Good. I hoped you’d want more abuse!” She roughly drags Allison up by the hair and sets her on her feet, then sweeps one hand up between Allison’s legs as her other palm slams forward between Allison tits. With little strain, Kat hoists Allison up into a Military Press and carries her around the ring with Mack hanging limp overhead. Kat yells at the crowd, “The Legion! Nobody can stand against us!”

She shoves Allison up to full arm extension, then simply walks out from under her and lets Mack drop to the canvas. Kat walks around the ring wiping the sweat from her brow before going back and using Allison’s top pulls her to her feet again and marches Mack to a corner. Kat now points to Richard Fannin, and reaches back and Bitch Slaps Allison.

Kat digs her fingers into Allison’s cheeks as she turns Allison’s face so they are eye to eye. “You failed. All the hopes of stopping us on your shoulders and you failed!” Kat looks around over Allison’s head her hands moving to Allison’s boobs. She pushes Allison’s top up, baring the blonde’s pale orbs. “Now I’ll have some fun while we wait for the others.”

Kat begins squeezing and twisting Allison’s rack. The ref tries forcing Kat to move out of the corner, but the big blonde ignores him in favor of mauling Allison. The ref starts a five count and just before “five” Kat releases Allison’s tits, holds her hands up and walks to the center of the ring. Once she reaches mid-ring, Kat turns and charges, leaps with her knee raised and instead of driving it between Allison’s boobs, instead knees the REFEREE in the back, knocking him into Allison who he had been asking if she wanted to continue.

Now, with the referee out, Kat kicks him out under the bottom rope to the floor, then lifts Allison up in the corner and gives her a glimpse at what awaits. “I have on final move for you, then the others will come and finish you.”

She lifts Mack and sits her butt on the top turnbuckle, then pulls Allison’s head down and hooks her behind the knees. Lifting, Kat turns Allison upside down with her shoulder on the back of Allison’s neck, Kat carries Allison out to the center of the ring in the Muscle Buster as Allison’s face starts turning bright red. Kat stops, then falls backward, crushing Allison into the canvas. Kat leaves Allison starfished, spread-eagled on the canvas like she may be out cold - but without a ref, there’s no way for Kat to complete her victory so she gets up and walks to the ropes nearest the stage area where she waves to call someone from the back.

A ref comes stumbling out followed by the rest of the Legion with Neve Campbell shoving and pushing the ref toward the ring as Erika Christensen, Rachel McAdams and Agnes Bruckner form a cordon to prevent his escape.

“Get his ass down here!” Kat screams.

Suddenly, the fans erupt as Erica Durance, Billie Piper, Michelle Ryan and Yvonne Strahovski burst through the curtain and match up with Legion. The ref scrambles out of the way and the brawl is on! Kat stays in the ring, screaming for the ref to come back. The few fans not totally sucked into the brawl on stage, notice Allison crawl to ropes on the far side of the ring.

Neve fighting Erica catches her with a low blow dropping Durance to her knees. Neve turns and grabs the ref and starts pulling him toward the ring. Tiring of the ref’s complaints, she slaps him, saying, “Get in there and make the three count.”

At that time three things happen!

First, Erica Durance nails Neve with a forearm to the head knocking her into the security railing.

Second, Kat turns around - right into a spear from Allison which the ref sees and he runs to the ring and climbs thru the ropes just as Allison drops on of Kat.

Third, the ref counts, ONE...TWO...THREE!

Shock and surprise fill the arena and Erica tosses Neve over the guardrail into the crowd, then jumps into the ring to help Allison. She almost carries her costar as she helps Allison to the back while Billie, Michelle and Yvonne hold off the Legion.

Kat, regaining consciousness in the ring, can’t believe she lost. Neve, climbing back over the railing, is mad enough to chew glass. The Anti-Legionnaires manage to escape to the back, leaving the Legion fuming at the turn of events.

Allison Mack stands in the shower, she’s actually lost track of how long she’s been standing there with the hot water running over her sore body. Mack can hear the chatter of the other Anti-Legion women in the locker room. Allison rubs her left shoulder which took the most abuse in the match, when she hears all four of her friends yell, “GET OUT!”

Billie’s British accent rings out, “Women’s locker room mate, No boys!” Allison curious steps out from under the water grabbing the over sized towel and wrapping herself. Stepping out she now can hear the voice of Harold Green saying, “Sorry, I thought she would be ready by now. Just have Allison come to my office.”

Then she hears Richard Fannin say, “I’ll just wait here for her.”

Billie yells, “No you don’t mate, Allison isn’t as bawdy as some of us.”

Allison stepping out says, “Well that’s true Billie. You’re Bawdy enough for the both of us.”

She turns to the promoter, “You want to talk to me?”

Harold nods, “I need to know when you plan to use your rematch with Neve.”

Allison flashes her brilliant smile saying, “I’ll let you know, I want to consider this.”

Harold still nodding says, “Sure no rush, just let me know.”

Allison starts to her locker, looking over her shoulder she says, “You two can leave now.”

Harold starts to leave but has to turn and nudge Rich to get him to follow.

Later that night Team Archer sits alone with their manager at a table in Daunte’s bar. Camilla Belle says, “I thought we’d win.”

Michelle head down mumbles, “Yea.”

Archer, trying to keep team morale up, says, “Come on you’ll get them next time. They’ve been teaming for years and you two had them on the ropes. Next time you’ll...”

The manager is interrupted by a small blonde who chirps, “...lose to us instead.”

Looking up, Team Archer finds the Bone Slayers, Sarah Michelle Gellar and Emily Deschanel, standing at their table. Archer puts a hand on each of his young charges keeping them in their seats. Sarah smiling mocks, “You where soooo close. Nice try Mishy”

Emily adds, “I sure you’ll bet them next time. Too bad Sarah and I will be champs by then.” Then spinning around before anyone can respond, the Bone Slayers walk out leaving TA all alone.

Camilla and Michelle at the same time say, “I REALLY don’t like them!”

Archer orders more drinks. “Worry about us and the rest will take care of itself.”

Harold finishing his paper work heads out the door ready to meet up with the others at Daunte’s when stepping out into the hallway he hears a pained wail from some where. Look around he hears to wail a few more times but can’t track it down. Find a few of the crew members he asks, “Where is that coming from?”

One of them speaks up, “We searched all over, it looks like it’s coming from the duct work.”

Harold walks near on of the big vents and listens. It does seem the wails are coming thru the vent. Then he faintly hears a female voice whimper, “Please… no more Neve.”

Enjoying the thought of Legion members being punished, Harold walks out smiling.

Continue to Celebrity Championship Wrestling Show #18