October 2001

JESSICA ALBA VS SARAH MICHELLE GELLAR

VS


Jessica Alba (52%) whips Sarah Michelle Gellar (48%)
Jessica Alba vs. Sarah Michelle Gellar: Jessica was anxiously awaiting her introduction at the arena entrance, rolling down her black socks over her black calf high wrestling boots and adjusting her black vinyl wrestling top which somewhat resembled a corset. She admired herself in the mirror, her shimmering black hair which had grown now below shoulder length, her tanned skin which the corset top and black briefs, as well as low cut boots allowed a generous showing. She was contemplating her strategy in the ring now only moments away as she also reflected on the events of the past month. Sarah had launched a war of words and a full fledged smear campaign on Jessica. She had constantly questioned Jessica's true fighting abilities. Sarah had been careful only to select opponents she knew she could easily beat to accentuate her own fighting talents.

What had originally been more just a casual rivalry between two of the top female action heroines in television had grown into something much much more. Jessica had come to loathe the mere mention of the names, Sarah Michelle and Buffy the Vampire Slayer. She knew words had now come to action and she was anxious to end this. Jessica knew Sarah was a veteran of the celebrity fight circuit. While she had confined her talents to sparring privately with only a few public fights to her credit, she was nevertheless ready. The spotlights shown as her name was announced and The Dark Angel made her way to the ring amid cheers and some boos.

Jessica limbered up in the ring as Sarah's name was mentioned. The crowd erupted as Michelle made her way to the ring. Jessica could first see Sarah's blonde locks shimmer in the lights but noticed to her chagrin that following her was a redhead. Alyson Hannigan! Willow, Buffy's best friend and Sarah's good friend and sparring partner in real life. Shit!! Double trouble for Jessica. There was no stipulation on ring seconds. Sarah stopped short of the ring. She wore a black silk warmup jacket that Alyson now removed to reveal a white sports bra, black briefs, black wrestling shoes with white laces and white socks. Even Jessica was impressed at the contrasting costume showing off Sarah's buffed figure. She grabbed a microphone and leaped upon the apron. "So you finally accepted my challenge, huh?! I know you're scare shitless of me. I'll give you three seconds to back out, go on run, run, Angel."

Jessica stood there defiant in a fighting stance. Sarah smiled back, "Let's do it!" She dropped the mike entered the ropes and the two girls charged each other smacking center ring. Both grabbing handfuls of hair and trying to trip the other they managed to stay on their feet. They both held on and kicked at each other. Neither gave a quarter. They released the tresses and held onto each other in a collar elbow lockup in a test of strength but they were too evenly matched. Sarah released and hit away Jess's arms and swung a left then right at her. The left grazed her and the right was missed as Jess retaliated with her own fists. The two stood toe to toe exchanging fists and now kicks. Soon welts appeared and small trickles of blood from the side of the mouths and noses. Both girls were already feeling exhausted and hurt in just the first few moments and still at a stalemate.

Jessica reached in grabbing Sarah's shoulders and prepared to headbutt her, but Sarah saw it coming and was only grazed on the side of the face. She grabbed Jess in a front facelock with her right hand and with her left grabbed her leg holding her as she maneuvered around for a neckbreaker taking Jess down. It was a weak maneuver but enough to get the first advantage.

As soon as they hit the mat Sarah hit Jess in the stomach with a high kick. As the second boot was coming Jess blocked it countering with a kick that hit the side of Sarah's knee and while Sarah yowled she wrapped their legs together in a grapevine trying to maneuver a figure four and injure Sarah's legs. Sarah knew what she was up to and kept a grip on Jess's ankle twisting when she could as the two rolled toward the ropes. Jessica rolled out and gripping Sarah's leg while Sarah held onto the rope slammed it across the apron. One more time and then another as she held down the leg sinking her teeth into Sarah's silken leg flesh, the exhaustion and hurt of the match dictated such tactics now. As she heard Sarah scream and concentrating on injuring a vital part of Sarah's arsenal she suddenly felt a sharp blow from the back. She released and turned to see Alyson. Alyson had something in her hand, a salt shaker striking Jessica in the forehead. She already had an abrasion from the earlier fisticuffs exchange. Jessica screamed as Alyson turned the shaker around and rubbed salt in the wound. The fight had just gone from ugly to uglier. Nasty to nastier.

"Oh poor baby, let me clean the boo boo." Jessica heard Alyson's sarcastic condescending threat as she looked up seeing Alyson with a bottle of rubbing alcohol and dousing a cotton ball. Jessica thrust a side kick protecting herself and throwing Allison back spilling some of the alcohol on herself and some ringside fans. Jessica retreated to the ringside, still stinging from the salt let out a yell of hurt and anger.

So, Sarah and Alyson had come to fight a dirty fight to the finish. Jessica could do that and would do that she thought to herself. As she turned to resume with Sarah, still hearing fans yell in surprise at the alcohol bath some took, she saw Sarah charge and tackle her. Landing hard on her back she immediately out of reflex wrapped her legs around Sarah's torso. The two slapped, punched and raked each other's faces and bodies as they stayed in close quarters rolling around the ring. Sarah again on top, gouged her thumbs in Jess's eyes. It stung and she was terrified Sarah had borrowed some of Alyson's salt, but she hadn't, although the deepness and ferocity Sarah was gouging was stinging enough and Jess was genuinely afraid she was trying to blind her. She maneuvered a knee under her stomach and managed to flip Sarah off her although she just rolled to her side. Jess reached out and to equalize the situation, as tears flowed from her eyes, she raked Sarah's. She squealed in pain as the two locked up in a grapevine both now relying on feel as their sight came back into focus. Jess yelped in pain as she felt her nose being bitten. She managed to get Sarah to let go but later realized Sarah just wanted to bite into something else since Jess wouldn't submit. Pressing Sarah down below her now Jess struck her with a head butt in the jaw and again to the nose. Sarah's lip split and in anguish and surprise as she opened her mouth, Jess bit down on the lower jaw. She held Sarah's mouth open with her own bite gripping her teeth and lower jaw. Sarah bit down catching her upper lip as the two sat and made pathetic squeals and yelps. They rolled with neither letting up till suddenly the ring let out from under them. They both rolled down one of the sets of metal ring stairs to the concrete floor.

Finally they let go of their grip on each other and lay on their backs. Jessica had rolled to her stomach as she felt a stomp to her back and saw Allison once again enters into the fray. Alyson had unscrewed the bottle of the salt shaker and sprinkled most of the contents around Jessica as well as dousing her with alcohol. Jess hurt too bad to care for the additional sting of the foreign objects. Alyson lifted her by the hair as Sarah made it shakily to her own feet. Jess was fighting on instinct now and thrust a chop to Alyson's throat, and one at Sarah as she grasped their heads and brought them together with a hollow thump. The impact opened a small laceration on both. Jessica rammed Alyson's head into the side of the metal ring stairs where she lay now dazed and nearly unconscious, with her cut opening up. A kick to the stomach doubled Sarah over and Jessica heaved her up into a bodyslam, landing her flat on one of the steps. Sarah's head rolled back touching her partner in crime, Alyson, as she lay beside the steps. Jessica stomped both women. Neither of them offered any resistance now and Jessica realized the fight was over. But not until she showed the world and her opponents what she was made from. She addressed the audience as she pointed out to her two fallen opponents.

"I guess you know what Sarah Michelle Gellar's true colors are now. Yellow! She couldn't fight me alone, could she?" The crowd cheered as Jessica struggled to keep from staggering from her own exhaustion and injuries. "Well I added another color to Buffy and Tomato Top...RED! And now I'm not quite finished with them. Would you like to see me add some salt to their wounds?!" The crowd resounded with an affirmative response as Jessica tossed back both Sarah and Alyson to the ring. She grabbed what was left in the salt shaker and poured onto both girls wounds and doused what was left of the rubbing alcohol on both. As the barely conscious vampire slayer and witch could only awaken and scream, Jessica gave one last look of contempt at both and then gave a victory pose to the audience as she left the ring.


The Dark Angel slays the Slayers

Sarah Michelle Gellar & Alyson Hannigan feel the power of the Dark Angel

BACK TO THE CELEBRITIES
TO SARAH MICHELLE GELLAR
TO THE JESSICA ALBA


Mr. Skin