Backlash! Fatal Fourway
- CHRISTINA APPLEGATE VS JENNY McCARTHY VS BEYONCE VS JESSICA SIMPSON -
NOTE - This story immediately follows Backlash: ABA's Day Off
It is time for the Main Event of THE GOLD EXPERIENCE! Pay Per View. By the end of this match everybody knows things will never be the same. Jessica Simpson stands across from Beyonce with Jenny McCarthy on her left and Christina Applegate on her right. All four combatants heads are on swivels looking left to right, knowing everybody in the ring is a serious threat.
The situation from the ABA's standpoint is critical. Jenny's plan is to bring home the title then give Christina Applegate and Nikki Cox The Milano and replace them with Lucy Liu first and make their final decision on the last member. Her and Demi Moore's plans have been carefully laid Vivica Fox, Shannen Doherty and Jenna Jameson are among the finalist for the last spot. They trained separately from Christina. Really they have barely spoken to her since that last meeting where Jenny and Christina got physical. But all their plans pen on Jenny bringing home the title, which is no simple task by any means.
Meanwhile Christina has been on a path of self-discovery. She spent a lot of time alone. She spent some time training with Nikki. She spent more time hanging out with friends Jennifer Aniston and Cameron Diaz. One thing she has definitely discovered is that she no longer needs or wants her association with Jenny and Demi. After this match, one way or another either she is leaving the ABA or Jenny and Demi are leaving. Retaining her title would make whatever direction she chooses go a lot easier. Then again, the thought of losing her belt never entered Christina's mind.
For Beyonce, her catfighting career has not gone as she anticipated. It started with phenomenal success and winning the initial Bootylicious Championship over tremendously respected Jennifer Lopez. Since then have been a number of disappointments. She suffered losses to Alyssa Milano, Christina Applegate, Shakira and a draw with Christina Aguilera. The experts and critics were not hard on her, all sighting that she wrestled brilliantly against top talent. Beyonce, being one of the most driven and competitive humans on the planet did not share their opinion. Her recent victories and success did nothing to to erase those memories of being out wrestled. Even being offered the prestigious position in the Fab Four of substituting for Halle Berry during her maternity leave did nothing to ease her discontent. Her goal is to be the best. To settle for anything less would be Un-Beyonce-like.
To Jessica Simpson this is her chance to become the superstar she always wanted to be. It is her chance to gain the respect she feels she deserves. She always felt like she does not get the same respect or notoriety of Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera. She always seems to get second billing to her peers. She knows she is a gorgeous woman, but her name does not enter a discussion of 'who is the best looking Jessica?' It is either Jessica Beil or Jessica Alba. It's not because they are substantially better looking but because of her image. People see her as the ditzy, hot chick that everybody want to sleep with, while Alba and Biel are the classy ladies people want to marry. It is all unfair in Jessica's opinion. She is always the joke, the dumb blonde, always disrespected. She wants to win this crown, and all the glory and respect that comes along with it.
Jesssica backs up as the bell rings, and at that exact moment, Demi Moore, who accompanied Jenny to ringside reaches into the ring and trips Jessica. Jessica falls to the mat but immediately pops back up to her feet and whirls around, eyeing Demi. Jenny attacks Jessica with forearms from behind.
Meanwhile, Beyonce sees Jessica fall victim to the outside interference and starts over to help, but halfway there, Christina intercepts and attacks Beyonce from behind as well. Soon the two ABA girls have battered the two fan favorites into corners on opposite sides of the ring. Even though Jenny and Christina are estranged currently, old instincts take over. They whip Jessica and Beyonce towards each other from their opposite corners.
Jessica and Beyonce are headed towards each other in a head on collision. As they meet, the two Texans, lock arms together like they are square dancing, doing a dosie-do and complete a circle, and head back in the directions they came from. When Beyonce returns to Christina, she dives and levels her with a flying clothesline. Jessica launches herself the same way and plows over Jenny as well. Both Jenny and Christina scramble back to their feet, only to find Jessica and Beyonce waiting for each of them. Beyonce and Jessica execute simultaneous dropkicks on their opponents, knocking them both to the canvas. Being assaulted from what seems like a choreographed attack, Jenny and Christina both roll under the bottom ropes and out of the ring, leaving Beyonce and Jessica to contend with each other.
After clearing the ring of the two ABA members, Jessica and Beyonce find themselves alone in the ring. They look at each other and stop. Then comes that awkward moment frequently found in Fourways that produce unusual matchups. They look at each other as if to ask each other and the audience, "Should we really fight each other?" Then the Texas girls both smile as if they both answer the question, "Hell yeah bitch!"
They lock up collar and elbow but Jessica quickly captures Beyonce in a headlock. Beyonce powers out of the headlock by pushing Jessica's arms up off her head and slings Jessica to the canvas by the arm she just forcefully removed from around her head. Never releasing that arm, Beyonce drops to the mat to apply an arm bar. Jessica quickly kips up to her feet and reverses out of the armbar and begins twisting Beyonce' arm. Realizing Beyonce is about to escape, Jessica leaves her armlock for another headlock. Beyonce pushes Jessica off of her and sends her running into the ropes.
When Jessica bounces off of the ropes, Jenny reaches in from out of the ring and grabs Jessica's ankle again tripping her. Then Jenny pulls Jessica out of the ring by her leg. Across the ring Christina re-enters and attacks Beyonce from behind.
Now in the ring Beyonce and Christina are slugging it out, and Jessica and Jenny are trading fist outside. Beyonce is dominating Christina with her fist, while Jenny is gaining an advantage over Jessica outside. When Jessica swoons from one of Jenny's blows, Jenny grabs Jessica's arm and whips her into the ringpost. Jessica bounces off the pole and falls to the ground. Inside the ring, Beyonce has Christina rocked. She hooks Christina and lifts her up and sends her crashing to the mat with a suflex. Beyonce covers the champion hoping for a quick pin, but Jenny has crawled back into the ring and breaks the count by grabbing Beyonce's leg and pulling her off of Christina.
Jenny waits for Beyonce as she get to her feet, then rocks the singer with a forearm to her jaw. While Beyonce's knees buckle, Jenny lifts her up by grabbing the Dreamgirl around the waist. Then the buxom blonde drops Beyonce to the mat with a Sidewalk Slam. Jenny hooks the leg and covers Beyonce for the pin. Christina breaks the count by slamming a double clutched fist to Jenny's back.
Incidentally, Christina has been looking pretty buffed lately. Maybe its just a by product of her age, and needing more time in the gym to maintain her sexy figure. Maybe it was the tough physical demands of starring in the Broadway musical Sweet Charity. Either way Christina is looking very strong. She proves this fact, by pulling Jenny to her feet from behind. Then she grabs both of Jenny's arms and pulls them behind her back, before using her arms to lift Jenny off of her feet then throwing her face first to the mat. Beyonce is getting up and Christina captures her the exact same way. She lifts Beyonce in the air by a double hooked arms behind her back and drops the screaming diva flat on her face also.
Christina takes a moment to showboat her impressive power maneuvers to the fans, never noticing Jessica crawling back into the ring. Instinctively she senses someone approaching from behind and whirls around in time to get clobbered over her head by Jessica's fist. Jessica continues her attack marching Christina back against the ropes. Then Jessica grabs Christina's arm and tries to whip her into the ropes. However the wily champion reverses the whip and sends Jessica running. When Jessica rebounds off the ropes she dives on to Christina and knocks her to the mat. Jessica stays on top of her foe, going for a pin attempt. Christina easily kicks out, and both women scramble back to their feet.
Back on their feet, Jessica tries a high kick aimed at Christina's head. The champion catches the limb in mid flight and twists it making the leg's owner fall to the mat on her face. Christina grapevines her leg around Jessica's and drops down on the Texas delight's back. Christina bends Jessica's leg up until her heel is being driven into her ass. Christina lies across Jessica's and pulls back on Jessica's chin with both hands, locking the singer in a STF, Stepover Toehold Submission.
Everybody realizes Christina's power by Jessica's screams of excruciating pain. Jessica is inching her way to the ropes, if she can not make it, is obvious to anyone that the game, young competitor will have to tap out.
Meanwhile, Jenny and Beyonce are back up. Jenny tries to kick Beyonce, but the singer catches Jenny's foot as well. Thinking fast, Jenny tries an insaguri kick, where she uses Beyonce's grip on her foot to lift up and kick your opponent in the back of the head with her other foot. Beyonce had this all scouted and ducks under Jenny's kick allowing the busty actress to fall flat on her face. Beyonce then maneuvers and locks Jenny in a Boston Crab. Beyonce cranks back as hard as she can hoping to gain a submission from Jenny quicker than Christina can force one from Jessica.
The fans cheer their favorites, as both Jenny and Jessica are both hopelessly trapped in their submission holds and screaming in pain. Jessica looks like she will be the first to tap. She appears to be in much greater pain, but gallantly fights and claws her way to the ropes. Finally she is able to reach out and barely grab the bottom rope to cause the break. Christina rises off of Jessica as she continues to wither in pain on the mat. Christina walks to Jenny and Beyonce and violently kicks Beyonce in the back of the head. Beyonce shouts and grabs the back of her head as she is launched off of Jenny. Seeing stars fluttering and twinkling all around her head, Beyonce rolls out of the ring to the safety of ringside to recover.
With Jessica, Beyonce, and Jenny all down on the mat, Christina drops on top of Jenny and puts her in the STF Submission. With her back already hurting Jenny screams and starts reaching for the ropes. "Weak bitch!" Christina spits. "I know your punk ass will submit." True enough Jenny looks close to tapping when Jessica does a low drop kick that nails the champion in the head, that knocks her tumbling off of Jenny.
The fans are in a frenzy now with all the hectic action. They are all thanking Stone Rage for booking this match before allowing the controversial new booking committee to take over. Beyonce is still down. Jenny is rolling toward the ropes like a tired defeated fighter. Luckily Demi is there helping pull her under the ropes before Jessica can get to her. Now Jessica and Christina, who is getting to her feet, still a little shaken by the drop kick to the head are about to settle things in the ring.
Jessica grabs Christina by the hair going to work on the champion with her fist. Suddenly Christina places her head against Jessica's chin, grabs her hair and drops to her knees pulling Jessica down with her executing a Jaw Breaker. The fans are just as shocked by the move as Jessica, but after all, Christina Applegate is arguably the Greatest Champion ever, she is not losing that belt without one helluva fight.
Christina gets up first, and helps Jessica up. Christina gives Jessica a loud chop across her chest. To everyone surprise, the spunky singer fires a chop right back across Christina's chest. Christina hits Jessica in the jaw with a punch, but Jessica fires her own punch back to Christina's jaw, seeming to gain energy and momentum. They trade many more punches with each giving as good as she gets. Then, Jessica ducks under one of Christina's haymakers allowing the champion to sail past her. Next Jessica uncorks a powerful kick to Christina’s head, which launches the champion off her feet and landing flat on her back. Showing she is not too dumb of a blonde, Jessica wisely drops on top of Christina for the cover. The stunned champion is barely able to kick out at the two count.
While outside the ring, most fans were so engrossed in Christina and Jessica that they did not notice, Jenny and Beyonce getting to their feet and engaging in a slugfest of their own. Beyonce has Jenny clearly rocked and decides the best course of action is to roll Jenny back in the ring. Beating Jenny up at ringside does her no good. To win the prized belt, she has to pin someone in the ring, before any of these other dangerous competitors can.
Jessica has Christina trapped in the corner battering her with kicks to the chest and midsection. Across the ring, Beyonce has Jenny caught in the opposite corner. Beyonce is rocking Jenny with haymaker after haymaker.
Beyonce lifts a dazed Jenny up and seats her on top of the top turnbuckle. Jessica sees Beyonce out of the corner of eye and decides, she should try a high risk move now as well. It's just simple strategy of this type of contest. The first to get a pinfall takes home the gold. Risks are necessary to try and finish your opponent quickly, before the other two competitors can interfere. Jessica lifts an equally dazed Christina and seats her on the top turnbuckle.
Beyonce starts climbing the ropes, looking to suflex Jenny off of the top rope. Jessica does a handstand and wraps her legs around Christina’s head for a hurracanrana. Jessica executes the quick, flashy move to perfection, launching the champion off the turnbuckle, flipping a full 360 degrees in the air and landing with a booming thud on her back. Meanwhile Jenny starts fighting back against Beyonce. Jenny hammers punches into Beyonce's side and gut to prevent being suflexed to the canvas. Finally Jenny rips a sizzling upper cut that catches Beyonce flush on the jaw. Her head snaps back, and her knees buckle. With Beyonce obviously dazed and nearly out from the shot, Jenny gives the dreamgirl a hard two handed shove that launches Beyonce off of the ropes and landing just as hard and painful as Christina. Beyonce lies on her back with a hurting grimace on her face.
Seeing this, Jessica dashes over to Jenny's corner and before Jenny can leap down from the top turnbuckle. Jessica does a running handstand into another hurracanrana, launching Jenny through the air for a loud crash landing halfway across the ring. Jessica springs to her feet a ball of energy. Beyonce is down, Jenny is down, Christina is down, she can finally take home the victory. She quickly hair hauls Christina to her feet. The Texan holds Christina by the hair, and gets a running start to bulldog Christina into the mat and a quick cover. An excellent plan, but Christina had a better one. When Jessica leaps up to complete her bulldog, the wily champion catches her, then uses Jessica's own momentum to launch the singer over the top rope. Jessica goes hurdling through the air and lands with a sickening splat outside the ring on the hard arena floor.
Now Christina sees her opportunity to end this contest. She grabs Jenny by the hair and hauls her to her feet. Christina pulls Jenny's head between her legs and prepares for a Power Bomb. Christina lifts her rival up, but before she could slam her down, Jenny grabs a handful of Christina's blonde hair and starts pounding Christina’s head while seated on her shoulders. Christina shouts as Jenny hammers away at her teammate until Christina topples over backwards to the mat. The referee drops to the mat while Jenny is seated on Christina's chest, pinning the champion. "One... Two... Thrrr...." He stops Jenny's bid for glory short as Beyonce dives into the pair, and knocking Jenny off.
Beyonce acts fast. She pulls Jenny to her feet and headbutts her. With Jenny’s stunned, Beyonce tucks Jenny's head under her arm, and falls back, DDT'ing Jenny into the canvas. Beyonce hit the move precisely, spearing Jenny's head into the mat like a lawn dart. The force flips Jenny over onto her back allowing Beyonce to go for the pin. The referee slaps the mat three times while, Christina lies on the mat still holding her head, and Jessica lies at ringside like a lump of clay.
Beyonce slowly rises to her feet, slightly in shock. She done it, she has reached her goal. The Bootylicious diva is now the Battle Zone Warqueen! Beyonce realizes her dream has become a reality as the referee hands her the championship belt, and she hoists it above her head to the deafening crowd.
Beyonce looks at the aisle, and sees her baby sister Solonge running toward the ring. "You did it, you did it!" she exclaims as she climbs in the ring and leaps into her sister's arms. Following her sister is her cousin, and Destiny Child group mate, Kelly Rowland. Kelly gives her best friend a big embrace congratulating her on her accomplishment.
Following Kelly running at a frantic pace is the full Fab Four. Pam Anderson leads the way with her enormous breasts bouncing like gigantic lottery ping pong balls being blown around in a lottery machine. Tia Carrere follows cheering loudly before she reaches the ring. Jennifer Lopez is next wearing a huge smile. Halle Berry brings up the rear with tears in her eyes, enormously proud of her substitute. The Fab Four enter the ring and thing turns into a huge celebration. Literally its a 'feel good celebration' as Kool and the Gang's classic feel good song, Celebration blasts over the speakers. A party and celebration worthy of the end of a Star Wars movie.
Through all the commotion in the ring, Beyonce is approached by an obviously disappointed Jessica Simpson. She offers her hand to Beyonce and says congratulations to the new champion. "Congratulations Beyonce. You're going to make a tremendous champion." Jessica tells Beyonce.
Beyonce pushes Jessica's hand aside to give her a giant hug. "And so will you too, I know you'll have championship gold soon." Beyonce tells the blonde. "You are a marvelous competitor, and its an honor to compete in the same ring with you." Beyonce gives Jessica a smile. "Anything you need from me, just give me a call. Anytime you want a title shot, it's yours too." Beyonce says and raises Jessica's hand and presents her to the audience for them to give her a standing ovation. Solonge, Kelly and the Fab Four join clapping for Jessica. Finally hot, perky, and sometimes goofy Jessica was getting the respect she deserves.
Suddenly the lovefest and good time feelings are upstaged as Christina approaches Jenny, who is still down at ringside with Demi attending to her. "You stupid, incompetent bitch!" a snarling Christina yells "You fucking lost my title!" Even Beyonce's victory music is stopped, as everybody in the arena watch this much anticipated confrontation. "It's over!" Christina shouts to many fans amazement, "YOU'RE OUT OF THE ABA.... And if you don't like it Demi, then your ass can go too!!!!!!!!!!!!" Christina's words echoed loud and clear. The arena is silent, as everyone knows they are witnessing by far the most monumental moment in the league in several years. Nikki Cox runs down the aisle from backstage to fulfill her role in this historic showdown.
Jenny does not look up at Christina, she just starts chuckling. Then her chuckles break into full laughter. Demi joins in with Jenny laughing like someone has just told the funniest joke in America. "Nooo you idiot, we're not going anywhere..... you two are." Jenny finally responds. Then Jenny slowly rises to her feet, and her whole demeanor changes. Suddenly she changes from funny girl to crazy rampaging bitch. "How are you going to get rid of me?" Jenny shouts at the top of her lungs like a mad lunatic. "I am the original AMERICAN BAD ASS! This group was nothing before I beat Britney Spears for the War Queen title. I established our dominance over this league and the Fab Four by defending the title and kicking Tia Carrere and Pam Anderson's ass! I destroyed Jennifer Lopez! It was Me! Not You! Not Alyssa Milano! IT... WAS... ME!!!!" Jenny finishes screaming at the top of her voice.
The two former friends stand a few feet apart staring each other eye to eye. Jenny is so mad she is trembling. Christina stands motionless, locked in this stare down with Jenny. The moment of truth has arrived. Although both women have made plans to end their union in the ABA, they hesitate. This ends an era in both of their lives, a successful era regardless of the many failures they suffered during this time. They entered the ABA as longtime friends. Now they stand on the brink of being enemies. They both regret that things have come to this point. If life truly has a soundtrack playing as we live out the moments of out life, then Gladys Knight and the Pip's "Neither One of Us" is playing somewhere. At this point it is a matter of who is first willing to let go of the past.
Finally the surreal moment unfolded in slow motion it seemed. Christina brings her fist up and around, clobbering Jenny upside her head. Jenny rocks back then fires a shot straight to Christina's nose. Then it explodes. Jenny and Christina take turns exchanging the heaviest bombs of the day. One after another they pound each other. At the same time, Nikki darts from behind Christina and pounces on Demi. The red head and the brunette engage in a vigorous hairpulling contest.
"Wow" Pam says as she, Beyonce, family and friends watch captivated by the implosion of their arch rivals, the ABA. "Good thing they didn't hit like that during the match, or you'd never won the belt." Wide eyed Pam continues, as she watches the vicious fighting.
"For Sure" Beyonce agrees with a head nod.
Jenny and Christina still exchange bombs like the most hated of enemies ever seen in the Battle Zone. Nikki actually has a huge smile as she and Demi struggle locked together by their hair. Although Nikki is losing gobs of her thick red hair, she is overjoyed to finally be able to tear into Demi. She has wanted to rid the ABA of her ever since she arranged their release from that Las Vegas jail cell. Nikki whole heartedly believes this witch is the sole reason for the ABA's demise.
A battle this intense could not last for long. Jenny's legs become shaky and her punches become slower. Seeing the weakness, Christina intensifies her attack. Jenny's head is bounced around on her shoulders. Her blonde hair swings and flies covering her face. Then a right cross deposits Jenny on her ass. At the same time, Nikki starts firing knees up into Demi's gut. She hears Demi gag and grunt and her knees buckle. Finally Nikki rips an uppercut to Demi's jaw that deposits her on her ass, just like Jenny.
"It's over Jenny!" Christina forcefully proclaims. "You and Demi are both out! No more ABA!" Christina says as she and Nikki looks down at a beaten Demi and Jenny sitting on the ground.
Then Christina hears a voice from behind her, "No stupid, its over for you. We’re ABA, and you're out." Christina whirls around to confront the voice. Lucy Liu is there and blasts her with a karate kick to the blonde's jaw. Nikki turns and gets blown away by a similar kung fu blast from Chiaki Kuriyama.
Christina is stunned, she reels from Lucy's kick. Lucy's educated feet flash up several more times, as Lucy mercilessly executes Christina's Milano. Christina flails, rocks and reels from side to side as Lucy punishes her with kick after kick to the blonde's beautiful face. Nikki's execution is just as brutal. Chiaki pelts her face as well kick after kick. The Milano is the ABA's goodbye party from the group. They are intended to be brutal and demeaning, but there has never been a Milano like this before. Lucy and Chiaki look like they are trying to beat Nikki and Christina to death. Once the executioner's legs slow, Nikki and Christina crumble to the ground.
Once Nikki and Christina's limp body crumble Demi and Christina leap to their feet and start stomping each of them. Lucy and Chiaki join in, and stomp their former friends into oblivion. Christina and Nikki are lifeless and defenseless as the current ABA destroys their former members. The display is so brutal, fans are turning away and booing. The Fab Four even consider intervening it is so bad.
Christina's friends, Jennifer Aniston and Cameron Diaz sit at ringside. Cameron is leaving her seat to help Christina, but Jennifer grabs her arm and stops her. "No" She tells her friend. "This is ABA business. Christina has to go through this by herself. Don't interfere, its for the best." Jennifer advises. Cameron frowns in compassion for her friends and reluctantly sits back down.
Soon the savage beating ends. Jenny, Demi, Lucy and Chiaki become euphoric. They jump up and down screaming and celebrating. It is far from the day they envisioned. They did not accomplish everything they wanted. They hate to see Beyonce walk away with the belt, although that is better than Christina keeping it. But they did achieve their number one priority. A task that if gone undone, would have eventually ripped the group apart to the point they could not have survived. They expelled Christina and Nikki from the group. A task that is apparently very unpopular, the crowd boos them feverously. But the ABA does not care. They feel they have evolved into a new and stronger entity.
The infamous group starts making their way up the aisle to celebrate their ABA achievement. Then all four break out in sick laughter as two EMT medics rush past them with stretchers. Without a care or concern for their former compatriots, the new ABA coninue their celebration, taking it back to the dressing rooms.
Jennifer Aniston and Cameron Diaz now hop over the security wall and are checking on their fallen friends, Christina and Nikki. They assist the medics and help load the broken bodies onto the stretcher, so they can be taken out for further medical attention.
In the ring, the almost forgotten new champion, Beyonce and her entourage leave the ring. The Fab Four hoist Beyonce onto their shoulders and carry her back to the dressing room. The excited and proud diva holds her new title high above her head to the cheering crowd. The new champion receives the royal treatment that befits her.
So closes one of the biggest, most eventful Pay Per Views in the history of the Battle Zone. New champions, and new destinies have been fulfilled and forged. Things have changed and they will never be the same. The future is in the hands of the young godess Beyonce. The eminent threat of the new ABA is on the horizon, a threat that may be more dangerous than ever. There is a broken former champion mending her wounds and ready to extract her vengance. Makes you wonder what is in store for next month's Pay Per View.
BACK TO THE CELEBRITIES
TO THE ABA
TO JESSICA SIMPSON
FOLLOW AVA DEVINE TO HOGTIED!
FOLLOW Annika Albright TO PUBLIC DISGRACE!