ThE RoCk tHe BoAt CrUiSe!
Jenna Jameson vs Coco
"Ladies and gentlemen, are you ready for some more action?" Samuel L Jackson asks standing in the middle of the ring to an outdoor stadium of roaring fans. "We have already seen a performance from a true pioneer and legend, Ice T!" shouts the host for this night's festivities. "Was that bad ass or what?" He asks riling up the audience. "Uh huh, What about the Foofighters? Too fucking awesome!" Again the crowd loudly roars their approval. "Now its time for the reason we all came out... to see some hot babes kick some mutha fuckn' ass........" Again the audience erupts in the loudest cheers of the night. "Its the last matches of the ThE RoCk tHe BoAt CrUiSe! So, we've got two matches for you tonight. In the main event, the champion, Kelly Clarkson squares off against Jessica Simpson for the Songbird title." Samuel again pauses for the audience to quiet down so he could be heard. "But first, we've got a fight with two of the hottest blondes on the planet."
"You've already seen our first competitor's husband tonight on this very stage. Yeah, the pimp of the year, Ice T's amazing wife is making her debut in the Battle Zone. Ladies and gentlemen please welcome Coco to the ring!" Coco emerges from behind the curtain and steps onto the stage. A modest smile spreads across her face as she hears the warm reception from the audience. Coco gains confidence with every step. Soon her walk becomes a strut as she walks down the steps from the stage, and heads down the aisle made by two security walls leading to the ring. Following behind is her husband Ice T. Once in the ring, Coco removes her robe to reveal a tiny shiny silver string bikini trying to cover her amazing body. After dropping the robe, she could hear the audience marvel and talking about her unique, traffic stopping figure.
"Daymmmmnnn" Samuel exclaims. "What did I tell you? She's hot, but her opponent is just as hot. She comes fighting out of Las Vegas, and accompanied by her boyfriend, another bad mutha fucka, The Huntington Beach Bad Boy, MMA champion, Tito Ortiz. She is the Queen pen of the adult film industry. Ladies and gentlemen, give a warm welcome to Jenna Jameson!" Jenna bursts through the curtain with much more confidence. She is by far the more experienced wrestler. Unlike Coco, Jenna has competed in several other leagues. Also she has been training with Ortiz and Lucy Liu during her bid to become a member of the ABA. Jenna struts down the aisle with the confidence of a champion entering a tune up bout before moving onto bigger and better things. Jenna takes the ring, and waves to her fans. Jenna removes her robe, and gets a nice ovation, not as large as Coco's but enough to satisfy the blonde's massive ego.
The referee quickly clears the ring and directs each ladies' seconds to their corner. With the ring cleared, he quickly calls for the bell. Hearing the bell the two combatants lock up collar and elbow.
The two ladies struggle against each other evenly and stagger around the ring. The deadlock continues until Jenna grabs a handful of Coco's hair and flings her foe to the mat. Coco quickly scrambles to her feet and looks to the referee to complain, while Ice already protests from outside the ring. However, the experienced Jenna pulled Coco's hair on the opposite side from where the referee was standing, so he did not see anything. While Coco is complaining Jenna flashes a kick into Coco's gut, doubling her over. Jenna grabs a double handful of Coco's hair and wrings her head back and forth. "Here's your hair pull, hooker" Jenna says between laughing.
With the referee counting for the break, Jenna grabs Coco's arm and whips her into the corner. Jenna charges in after her prey, but Coco slips out of the corner just in time, then grabs Jenna's golden hair and slings her over backwards to the canvas by her hair. Jenna springs back up, but Coco is waiting and grabs her hair again and slings her to the mat again. This time, Jenna rolls out of the ring. Tito rushes over to his twin children's mother, and helps her to her feet. The couple shout their displeasure about Coco's blatantly illegal hair pulling.
Jenna has some stern words for the official who is dutifully counting her out. Jenna climbs onto the ring apron, still giving the official some choice foul words. Suddenly Coco runs over to the ropes and grabs Jenna's hair and starts to pull her over into the ring. However instead of pulling her over the top rope, she stops half way through, leaving Jenna hung over the top rope, doubled over with her ass bouncing in the air. Coco smiles to the crowd then starts spanking Jenna's ass as hard as she could. The audience roars in laughter. Finally Jenna is able to bounce off the top rope, back to the ring apron. Although, Coco still has a grip on Jenna's hair, and flings her over the top rope back into the ring. Jenna lands hard and rolls across the ring. Jenna then crawls on her hands and knees trying to get away from Coco. Of course Coco follows and catches Jenna as she reaches the ropes on the opposite side of the ring. Coco grabs two more handfuls of hair to pull Jenna to her feet, but Jenna lunges up and grabs Coco's tiny silver bikini top. Jenna falls back, pulling Coco forward, making her tumble through the ropes, out of the ring.
Coco falls between the ropes and crashes to the hard ringside floor. Her bikini top is dislodged, showing her big breasts. Ice runs over and helps Coco to her feet. She is still a little shaky, but turns to get back into the squared circle. As she does, Jenna comes running and slides, nailing Coco in the face and chest with a two foot baseball slide. Coco is launched backwards and goes rolling across the ringside floor. Jenna follows out of the ring and walks to where Coco is lying. She grabs the stunned beauty by her hair and thong bottom and ushers Coco back to the ring. She rolls Coco under the bottom rope into the ring, while Tito comes over in case Ice decides to interfere.
Jenna returns to the ring as Coco rises to her hands and knees. Jenna runs over and delivers a swift kick to the fallen beauty's ribs. A loud thump rings out, as Coco collapses to the mat convulsing and holding her ribs. Jenna reaches down and seizes two handfuls of Coco's hair and hauls her enemy to her feet. Jenna takes a moment to gather herself, then takes two steps and launches a screeching Coco flying through the air, by her hair. Coco flies several feet from the hair toss, twisting in the air, until she lands on her big plump butt.
The referee admonishes Jenna for the rule infraction, but the blonde waves him off, and returns to Coco. She grabs Coco's long curly blonde hair again and drags her across the canvas to the middle of the ring. Jenna places her feet on Coco's hair, pinning it to the mat, and grabs both of Coco's wrists. Then she pulls Coco's wrists up, lifting her body off the mat while her hair is firmly on the mat under Jenna's feet. Coco screams as her hair is being pulled out by its roots and her neck is stretched to its limits. The referee initiates a count to break the illegal hair pull. Jenna turns her head to give him a few more choice foul words. With Jenna's attention diverted, Coco brings her legs up. Coco quickly pulls on Jenna's ankles as her legs clamp around Jenna's waist. With a quick turn of momentum, Coco sends Jenna flipping forward and into a small package pin attempt. Jenna is able to kick out at the two count.
Both girls quickly scramble to their feet. Coco beats Jenna up by split seconds and tries to kick Jenna. However Jenna catches Coco's foot in mid flight and pulls Coco off balance, till she falls to the mat. Jenna drops to the canvas, and twists Coco's ankle into an ankle lock. Jenna could see the pain and frustration register on Coco's face. Jenna smiles seeing her opponent's mental composure crumble. "What's the matter Coco? Getting your big fat ass kicked?" Jenna taunts. Next she twists Coco's ankles harder shouting, "How's that feel Coco? huh? How's that feel?" Instead of demeaning Coco, it infuriates her. She reaches over and grabs Jenna's bikini top and pulls her closer to launch a few punches to her rival's face. A final kick with her other leg, knocks Jenna away.
Jenna's top was dislodged when Coco tugged on it. It is uncomfortably around her neck and pushing her breasts into awkward positions. Jenna reaches behind her back and pulls a string securing the knot, untying the back. Jenna snatches the flimsy top off her neck and tosses it to the side.
Coco is slowly rising favoring her ankle. When she stands, Jenna comes charging with a clothesline. Coco comes back to life and ducks under the attempt. When Jenna turns around, Coco is waiting with her own clothesline, leveling her opponent. Jenna pops right back up again, only to be plowed down again by another of Coco's running clothesline. The resilient porn mogul pops right back up again, only to be knocked down again by a big haymaker to Jenna's face.
Jenna lies on the mat flat on her back looking up at Coco for a moment. Her only movement is her big tits rising and falling as she breaths heavily. She can not believe she could possibly lose to Coco. If she did, it would be devastating to her career in the premier celebrity catfight organization, The Battle Zone. So far she has Jenny McCarthy's support, and pushing. In fact Jenny's influence got her this match. If she loses Jenny's favor, her career will take a totally different turn.
In these few moments, Coco also takes her uncomfortable, torn top and tosses it aside. The woman who wore a fishnet dress with her tits and nipples poking through the holes, certainly is not shy about going topless.
When Jenna starts getting to her feet, Coco helps her with a handful of hair. Once she is standing, Coco grabs an arm and whips her enemy across the ring. At the last moment, Jenna reverses Coco's whip and sends her crashing hard into the corner turnbuckle instead. Jenna charges in afterward, but runs into Coco's elbow. Jenna's head snaps back and swoons for a moment. Long enough for her shorter opponent to lift herself up with the aid of the ropes and lock her legs around Jenna's head. Then she sends Jenna flipping to the mat with a head scissors take down. Jenna flips in the air and lands on her back, sliding across the mat. When she stops, Coco dives on top of her for the pin fall. The referee counts "One!... Two!..." before Jenna kicks out.
Coco utters an explicative as she rises to her feet. Jenna is slowly rising, when Coco grabs Jenna's head, and draws it under her armpit into a front face lock. Coco yells to the crowd as she prepares to fall back and DDT Jenna to the mat. As she does, Jenna's knee flashes up and strikes the inexperienced Coco right between the legs. The audience releases collective, "OOooooh" as Coco releases Jenna, and grabs her cunt, while jutting out her already enormous butt. Jenna stands and hoists Coco up across her shoulders in a fireman's carry. Then she tosses Coco off of her shoulders, sending her flying until she lands hard on her back, with a John Cena like finisher, The Attitude Adjustment. Jenna immediately falls on Coco and hooks her leg for the pin fall. Coco barely kicks out at the two and a half count.
Coco sits up grimacing, and holding the small of her back. Jenna stands and hair hauls Coco up to her feet. Coco struggles to get away. Then Jenna kicks her in the gut angrily, muttering, "ghetto slut." Coco backs up a few steps and holding her stomach. Jenna strikes with a clothesline to plow down her foe, but to her surprise, Coco ducks under the arm again. Jenna curses and wheels around back at Coco. As she turns, Coco executes a spinning kung fu kick. Coco's foot explodes flush on Jenna's jaw.
Jenna's head snaps back, her lights go out and her body goes limp and collapses to the canvas. Her arms splay to the side and her legs separate. Coco falls across the totally unconscious Jenna's chest and hooks her leg for the pin fall. The referee easily count to three, and Jenna's body never moves the whole time.
Coco releases Jenna's leg and rises off of her victim. Jenna's leg falls lifelessly to the mat, and she continues to lie spread eagle on the mat. There is no movement except her mountainous tits rising and falling slowly with each breath. Coco's entrance music, her husband's cult classic, "New Jack Hustler" explodes over the speakers. The crowd explodes in cheers. Coco jumps up and down excitedly as the referee scrambles to her feet to raise her arm in victory. Coco then looks down at Jenna's lifeless body and laughs. "Ghetto my big ass bitch. I was like raised in Beverly Hills." Coco says sounding like a high school debutant. Coco jumps out of the ring, and leaps in Ice's arms. Next she lavishes him with kisses. The couple exit the ring side area as Tito climbs in the ring to tend to his KO'd woman.
Tito finds his woman completely out cold. After forty-five seconds or more, Tito is able to revive Jenna. Slowly she opens her eyes and looks around bewildered. "What happened?" she asks. "Where's Coco?" Then she starts to understand what just happened, and exclaims, "Awwww shit!" Jenna's expression shows the emotional agony of defeat.
"Girl you are a trip! Haa! Haaaa! Haaaa! Haaaaa!" Kimora Lee Simmons laughs as she walks across the deck of their luxurious cruise ship with Coco the next day. "You are definitely not like people would think you would act. First of all, you are married to gangsta ass Ice T, an OG, original gangsta. You're in all the black magazines, Smooth, King and SSX. Hell, Black Men's Magazine has given you your own magazine quarterly with just you. I'm half black, and the only way I can get in those magazines is to buy add space. Your pictures are all over the hood, and you turn out to act like a fucking Valley Girl!"
"I'm just totally me okay." Coco answers. "Ice always says, 'keep it real'. Well I do. I act the same way when I'm in Beverly Hills or in South Central LA or Newark. Trying to be something that I'm not, just isn't me. At least I don't say 'radical' anymore." Coco finishes with a laugh.
"Well beating Jenna Jameson isn't easy for a valley girl or a hood rat. I'm very impressed." Kimora compliments. "When we get back to LA, you're coming to the Fab Four facility to train with us. With the ABA trying to kick our asses, and the Resistance trying to kick our asses, we can use a tough ally like you. Training with Halle Berry, Tia Carrere, Jennifer Lopez and Pam Anderson will improve you beyond belief."
Coco is beaming, to be accepted into the inner circle of the prestigious, Fab Four. "Totally awesome!" Coco comments.
"How could you lose to Coco?" Jenny McCarthy barks into her cell phone. "Who the fuck is Coco? She's a fucking nobody! You got beat by nobody!"
Jenna moves her phone away from her ear to avoid the shouting woman bursting her ear drum. "It was just a lucky shot, that's all. She got lucky." Jenna argues back.
"It had better be." Jenny huffs back. "The new ABA is a catfighting syndicate. A syndicate is a group of organizations banded together for a common purpose. How can you be a benefit to my organization, when I have to save you from nobodies like Coco?" Jenny calms her voice a little to denote her seriousness. "You're my friend, and will always be my friend Jenna, but you really need to prove yourself if we are going to have a professional relationship in the catfight world. You need to perform a hit, and quickly if you want to be in my organization. I'm only going to have a small circle of friends that I can trust. I want you in that circle, but time is running out."
"Don't worry. I'll make it up." Jenna explains.
"You'd better!" >click<
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