Prelude: Missy Hyatt, self-proclaimed 'First Lady of Professional Wrestling' appeared on the Vicki Lawrence Show in 1993 and took a pot shot at 'The Price is Right' models, saying, "Those women are older than dirt!" Hearing this, Dian calls Vicki and demands a showdown with the 'Mouth of the South', Missy Hyatt. The filming date arrives, and extra security is hired in case the confrontation gets out of hand. Vicki begins the show and describes what will occur. First, there'll be a beauty contest where Missy and Dian match facial beauty, tits, shape, legs, back, and butt in a battle for lustful glances from the audience. Afterward, a submission-only catfight will take place between the two stacked blondes. The ladies are introduced and even before the beauty contest can begins the barbs fly.

Dian starts, "Hey Missy, you silicon slut, you might want to check your latest plastic surgeries in the mirror if you can find one that won't crack on you."

Missy retorts, "I'll just use Bob Barker's the next time I go over. He told me that he just dumped an overrated model. I couldn't believe that an old man would be able to dump a model and do better, but then I remembered he was with you."

Dian responds, "Well, Missy, everyone else west of the Rockies has already had your saggy body, so I guess a wrinkly old man is about all that is left."

But Missy ends it with, "Dian, why does Janice Pennington always get to hand the microphone to Bob-oh, that's right, the producers are afraid you'll use it elsewhere, my mistake."

Beauty Contest: Amazingly, the ladies remain robed during their exchange as the contest begins. As little disrobing per contest will occur as the point is to isolate one area of each woman at a time and judge that area against her competition. The first battle is facial beauty. Missy has a beautiful face, full lips, and nice cheekbones, but is no match for the former Miss World USA and Miss World USA 1st runner up and Dian's perfect facial features starts her off with a 1-0 lead. Next is the boobs contest. With the start of this battle, they drop an outer garment and reach to unhook bras that are obviously straining to hold massive breasts. Dian's natural full ones with the hard nipples are difficult to beat, but Missy has invested a lot to enhance her chest. Missy's superior gazongas and equally suckable nipples give her the chest match to tie in at 1-1.

Next is the midsection comparison as each woman drops a wrap from around their midsection to unveil their stomach and shape. Each is voluptuous but only Dian has the hourglass figure and her's overwhelms Missy to take a 2-1 lead. Lower body garments are then removed to reveal two great set of legs for that contest. Dian has gorgeous model's legs, but Missy also has shapely and more muscular legs. Dian edges Missy out with the thinner look to make it 3-1 and clinch at least a tie in this match up. Then they turn around to let the audience judge their backs in the 5th comparison. Dian wins this one with a more defined back although Missy's fuller back was also admired. Dian now has clinched the overall beauty contest with a 4-1 lead. The last comparison is the ass contest. Both have tight asses, but Dian once again has a little more definition which propels her to a win and a final 5-1 rout over 'The First Lady of Wrestling.' She can't resist a last dig before the fight, "First Lady, ha! I think a better title would be Second String."

Catfight: Both women are determined to wipe the floor with her opponent. Both women are nude after the beauty contest as they circle each other looking for an opening. Voluptuous bodies collide as the blondes wrap their arms around their rival's waist. Tits mesh with Missy's massive mammaries gaining a huge advantage. "Dian, you overrated slut, how do you like the way my tits squish yours?, Missy taunts. Dian grimaces as Missy continues to win not only the boobs battle but also exerting the superior force around the waist. Air is driven from Dian's lungs by the bear hug as her breasts continue to be dominated by Missy's much larger orbs. Missy leans her heavier and taller body against Dian's forcing the blonde's strong back to bend over. Dian now stumbles over to the floor with Missy following her path to cover her. Missy's larger body makes Dian's support its weight as Missy grinds her large chest into Dian's smaller one. Missy's huge pussy pounds Dian's as Missy raises herself in the air with her arms only to drop her body onto Dian's trapped form. On one rise into the air, Missy drops her body down on Dian only to find a Dian bent knee hitting Missy's pussy on its descent. Missy writhes in agony as she rolls off to the side of Dian.

Missy is still holding her throbbing pussy as Dian recovers and delivers some leg stomps to Missy's exposed stomach. Dian then drops a couple of elbows on Missy's enormous gazonagas, which are almost impossible to miss if that is your target. Missy screams as her tits now hurt along with her pussy. Dian stays down and lays across Missy's huge boobs with her body and wraps her arms around Missy's head in a front headlock. Dian ratchets her arms around Missy's neck, which brings the famous Missy grimace to her face. But Missy has enough contempt to spit into Dian's face. Dian raises up slightly only to drop her body down again on Missy's tits. "Want to spit at me again, slut?" Dian challenges.

Dian reorients her body to face Missy straight on and sits her nice ass on Missy's tits. Retaining her headlock, she wraps her lithesome legs around Missy's upper abdomen area. Dian squeezes the leg scissors hold, which has limited effect due to Missy's thick midsection, but Missy continues to suffer in the headlock. Missy begins to swing her fists into Dian's sides to expose her tormentor to some pain in an attempt to break the hold. Dian succumbs to the blows and releases the headlock. As she gets up, she delivers a couple of kicks to Missy's boobs as she retreats.

Dian looks at her body for bruises while Missy inspects her own tits for damage. Each woman is now standing staring into the other's face. Dian launches a right slap against the left side of Missy's face. Her head jerks back from the blow, but almost immediately Missy responds with a slap of her own, delivered with more force since her arms are fleshier. Dian reaches for Missy's hair, Missy responds, and the inevitable hair-pulling contest begins. Tresses are pulled as the blonde bombshells' heads are pulled violently from side to side. Once again, Missy's weight advantage works for her as she forces Dian back against a wall. The women change positions. Hair is pulled to first one lady's advantage, then the other. As Missy has Dian pinned against the wall at one point, she lifts a knee into Dian's narrow midsection to stun the gorgeous blonde. Missy turns her back to Dian, reaches back her right arm to wrap around Dian's beautiful neck, and snap mares Dian away from the wall. The former Miss World USA lands on her ass as Missy follows up with a couple of kicks to Dian's exposed back. Missy closes on Dian and grinds a knee into the perfect blonde's back while she pulls back on Dian's head with a chin lock. Dian "ohs" delight Missy as she presses her knee harder into Dian while pulling back more on Dian's head. Instead of continuing to resist, Dian pushes off with her legs back into Missy. Missy loses her balance and drops the chin lock as she lands on her own large ass after stumbling backward.

Dian follows up by rolling over Missy onto her stomach with some kicks. Dian situates her ass on Missy's ass and faces Missy's legs. Dian grabs Missy's ankles with her hands and pulls back on them to double up Missy's legs. Dian stabilizes herself and the hold by wrapping her legs around Missy's lower waist in a leg scissors. So not only is Missy trying to pull her legs away from Dian's hold on them but Dian is anchored by her legs underneath Missy's stomach. Dian spreads Missy's legs past their limit while giving Missy more discomfort around the pussy area with her scissors. "Hey first slut of professional wrestling, seems like you must have done a lot of talking and very little wrestling" Dian taunts. Missy hits the floor with her hands in frustration, as she has been unable to break the hold. Dian begins to bob her butt up and down on Missy's ass to add to the pressure. Missy is finally is able to break her legs free from Dian's hold and twists her body forcing Dian to release the leg scissors.

They rush each other, their hands lock in front of their bodies above their heads. Neither woman has particularly muscular arms, but Missy's heavier ones begin to bend Dian's thinner ones back. Missy concentrates on Dian's right arm, turning Dian's body around, and employs a hammerlock on it. Missy forces Dian to the carpet smashing the former beauty pageant blonde's large tits in the process. Missy stretches Dian's hand and arm awkwardly behind her back causing grunts to come from comely Dian. However, Missy really makes a mistake on positioning and falls prey to a left elbow thrown from Dian's free arm, which lands on the left side of Missy's face causing an immediate release of the arm bar.

Both confront each other again frontally, this time hands go lower to engage their opponent's globes. Missy's hands can squeeze more of Dian's tits due to larger hands and smaller targets. But Dian has inviting targets with Missy's huge gazongas. Grimaces and screams occur as both women's treasure chests are compressed and twisted by her opponent. Missy gains an advantage here when Dian is forced to disengage.

Missy chides, "What happened you overrated, under-titted slut, couldn't take the pressure of my strong hands crushing your out of shape tits?"

Both women are beginning to show the effects of the match's action. They face each other with boobs not as erect as earlier in the match, and perspiration drenches their body and mats their pussy hair as if they have been oiled down. Missy is the aggressor on this charge as she moves towards Dian. Dian lowers a shoulder and catches Missy in the abdomen, delivering a blow that makes the stacked blonde stumble backwards to the carpet.

Dian jumps on top of Missy sitting her ass across Missy's boobs and her thighs on top of Missy shoulders. Dian leg scissors Missy's head while Dian's hands play with Missy's face. Dian spits point blank in Missy's face to return an earlier insult as this match becomes nastier by the minute. Dian bounces her butt up and down on Missy's chest adding an additional strain to Missy's trapped neck and head. Missy attempts to buck Dian off but she retains her balance on Missy's upper body until Missy is finally able to roll her shoulders and her sweaty head helps lubricate an escape from the leg scissors as she separates herself from Dian. Missy and Dian arise simultaneously. Missy spews, "You bitch!"

Dian responds, "That's something, a whore like you calling ANYONE else a name."

They rush towards each other with each participating in their 3rd frontal contest, the first was hands above the head, the second hands squeezing tits, and now the most intimate, right hands entering the opponent's pussy. Both are excited and angry at the same time that these uninvited intrusions are occurring. Missy gains the advantage as Dian succumbs to Missy's larger hands, and the fact that Dian's orifice is more sensitive. Missy drives Dian onto her back and spread-eagles the former beauty queen. Missy lowers her huge gazongas over Dian's face in the first tit smothering action of the match. Dian gasps for breath as sweat-laden mammaries make it difficult for Dian to inhale. "How do you like my tits? You're flat-chested compared to me," Missy taunts.

Missy turns her attention to placing her arms over Dian's face and forcing Dian to taste the perspiration in her armpits and the stench of the body odor. Missy rubs the left underarm over Dian's face, and then follows up with the right armpit. Dian frantically tries to escape but Missy's body weight has her pinned. Missy doubles up her legs and moves forward to situate her large ass over Dian's face in a classic face-sitting maneuver. Missy puts her arms on her head to display their tone in addition to showing she does not need them to conquer Dian. Missy squirms that butt back and forth across Dian's beautiful face to grind in the sweat and smell from that area. Missy's huge pussy lips are more than a match for Dian's facial ones with some to spare. "Whore, now don't get too excited, you can get a longer exposure later," Missy promises. But Dian continues to buck and Missy's arrogance costs her as she loses her balance as she is thrown off of Dian and behind her head.

Both women wearily get up, almost out on their feet. Missy regains a standing position first because Dian is more spent. It now becomes apparent that Dian was waiting in the most advantageous position. On her knees, Dian moves her arm between Missy's legs and pulls the appendage up with all her might. Missy's pussy and crotch area stops the movement, an action evidenced by the glassy look in Missy's eyes. As Missy bends forward over Dian, Dian brings up a fist into Missy's jaw dropping the silicone blonde like a sack of potatoes. Dian picks Missy's up by the hair, turns her back to Missy's back, puts Missy's head on her shoulder and performs a neck breaker sending the pseudo wrestler down on her stomach.

What is now becoming apparent is that although Missy is the bigger and perhaps stronger woman, Dian is in much better aerobic shape. Dian has taken Missy's heavy artillery, survived it, and now is the more robust at the finish. Standing, Dian straddles Missy's back, leans over, and says in a voice loud enough for the spectators to hear, "I'm you worst nightmare, you pathetic, collagen-lipped, silicon-breasted, cellulite-legged, cow. Who's older'n dirt, now?" With that tirade, Dian grabs Missy's arms, extends then vertical from the floor and places her left foot on Missy's back in a surfboard maneuver. Missy's weight advantage now is resting on her massive tits on the carpet while Dian strains Missy's more limited flexibility, arms stretched up awkwardly toward the ceiling while her midsection is pressed into the floor.

Dian asks for Missy submission but the larger blonde resists. Obviously, she believes she can break the hold and still win the match. However, Dian continues to grind her foot into Missy's back while pulling Missy's arms away from the floor using her own. Missy's exhaustion shows itself with a submission accompanied with ..."you trashy overrated bitch."

Postmatch: Needless to say, Missy's submission did not come with a lot of opponent respect. Dian responds. "You over-cosmetized and over-surgeried slut, I don't care what a loser like you thinks. I destroyed you in my arena of the beauty contest, and then I battled you in your own arena of wrestling and cat fighting and have embarrassed you here also. I'm going to make you pay for your comments against models." Dian mounts Missy's back, straddling the defeated blonde as she whacks Missy's large ass with her right hand. "How do you like my good old-fashioned spanking?" Dian taunts.

Dian moves her hands forward, grabs Missy's head and mane, rubbing her face across the carpet. Dian turns Missy over, lowers her right arm and returns an armpit rub across Missy's face as the wrestler had done to her earlier in the match. One thing about a long match is the later you employ this move, the nastier it is. Dian's perspiration and odor under her arm is at its zenith as she grinds the area across Missy's face. Missy tries to turn her head, but Dian keeps the area perfectly located over Missy's nose and mouth. Dian lowers her boobs and tit smothers Missy's face in the deep canyon called her cleavage. Once again, the sweat, odor, and breath-robbing flesh torments Missy. Dian aims her hands at Missy's huge gazonagas, grabs hold of them, and begins to vigorously massage Missy's globes, squeezing her nipples between her fingers. "I'm going to milk you like Elsie" Dian promises Missy, and in a short time of forceful treatment, Missy's nipples begins to squirt some milk. Dian lets some of it hit her arms and licks some off, "Tastes a little spoiled, Missy-perhaps that is because of your age and you being out of shape," Dian chides. Dian grabs her own breasts and squeezes them until she too seeps milk out of her well-hung tits, "Here Missy, have some of the grade A." Dian lowers her nipples into Missy's mouth and Missy's grimace acknowledges her humiliation that Dian is controlling all of the events.

Dian asks for a dildo which she inserts into Missy's huge pussy, and subsequently triggers a stream of cum. Dian catches some on her hand and wipes her hand across Missy's face. "Here you go slut, you apparently have overused every other type of makeup-try your own cum and see how a white looks on you," Dian screams as she fingers her own pussy until she ejects some of her own cum onto Missy's face which mixes with Missy's to add up to quite an accumulation. Dian moves her ass forward to briefly hover over Missy's face, drops her butt down on Missy's cum-covered face, and face sits, which spreads the liquid evenly over the defeated blonde. Dian puts her hands on her head to now display her arms and show that her ass lying on Missy's head is all the force necessary to keep the pseudo-wrestler in submission.

The Vicki Lawrence audience yells and eggs her own, the last phrase being particularly apt as someone passes a carton of eggs to Dian, which she quickly puts to good use; smashing the eggs over Missy's head and face. "Hey whore, good luck on getting all of the sticky egg mess out of your hair. But after all, your hair wasn't very attractive to begin with." With that, Dian stands up, gives a couple of foot stomps into Missy's now slumped tits and sore pussy areas. Dian gives a final spit onto Missy's prone body and walks over to Vicki. "Vicki, thanks for letting me come on the show in front of all these people to prove what a lot people already knew-Missy's mouth writes a lot of checks her body can't cash."

Mr. Skin