KEIRA KNIGHTLEY VS KATE BECKINSALE
VS
"I am pleased to announce a whole new brand and division to Stone Rage Catfights. We are launching the United Kingdom Fury division primarily for our English and European fans." Stone Rage proudly announces at the press conference. "This new division will be free of Hollywood executive influences and focus on this area. (Meaning the new division is free of Quatro Calderon and the studio executives.) Let's begin by me introducing the person in charge of this bold new division. This new general manager will have unprecedented authority over the operations of this new brand. I have tremendous confidence that she is the right person for the job. I give you the new general manager of United Kingdom Fury, Lucy Lawless."
"Thank you Stone Rage for your warm welcome and definitely for your confidence in allowing me to manage this exciting new division." Lawless begins. "I'm not here to bore you with a lot of talk and promises. This division will be built on action and the marvelous women supplying the action. My job is to provide the stars, and imaginative match ups and matches."
"We have several top names in entertainment to start this division, and I am working very hard to add several more very soon. Two legends start the division, Catherine Zeta Jones and Elizabeth Hurley. Two other pillars that I intend to build this division upon are Kate Beckinsale and Keira Knightley who will be competing in out very first match in four weeks. Alesha Dixon and Myleene Klass have signed contracts. A newcomer to the celebrity catfight scene that is burning up the music industry, Rita Ora has joined our ranks. The Spice Girls, Melanie Brown, Victoria Beckham, Geri Halliwell and Emma Bunton are under contract as well." Lawless looks at the numerous reporters saying, "Others are definitely coming. This division will provide competitive and unique entertainment that will carve its own notch in the catfighting world. I'll take your questions now."
The next few weeks are filled with build up with marketing appearances and media hype. Through it all Kiera got the feeling that she is there to just be the foil that Kate beats to become the face of the new division. Keira looked up to Kate as a young actress herself. Kate has always been a beautiful, elegant and highly regarded figure. However that was a long time ago. The thought that people are thinking that Kate should be appointed the star of the division, rubbed Keira all wrong. Keira thinks that she should be the face of this new division. First Keira is twelve years younger than Kate. Keira's acting resume is beginning to rival Kate's too. Keira was flat out insulted that Lucy Lawless would rather set her hopes and dreams on someone nearing the end of her prime rather than her. Keira becomes determined to dash Lucy and the public's misguided wants and desires. She will not let Kate reach her destiny at her expense.
A small but eloquent venue is chosen for the inaugural match. The pricey event sold out within two days. The pay per view buy rates exceeds expectations. The crowd is excited and a bit raucous as the pre show proceeds. The scene is set for something special.
The audience cheers and shows their love as Keira Knightly is introduced first and walks into the arena. The fact that she is entering first is a slight to Keira. Once Kate is introduced, the audience's response escalates to another level. Kate walks to the ring like royalty. She knows how to make eye contact and be warm and receptive to the crowd, but still maintains the intensity of a kick ass warrior. Kate confidently walks to the ring with the grace and charm of Wonder Woman. Keira sees this power and desires it. She becomes more resolved to leave as the ring as the most popular woman in the arena.
Lucy chose the outfits for Kate and Keira to wear for their match. They both wore strapless corsets that are laced up from the back. They have matching bottoms and fishnet panty hose. Kate chose her favorite color, black for her outfit. Keira easily chose white for her outfit. She wanted to project herself as the heroine. Both being the same height, made them a striking pair. The audience appreciates Lucy's wise choices with the outfits.
The women stand face to face for the opening instructions from the referee. It is the classic face off. Their eyes meet. Kate expected to see the eyes of the young woman that she met well over a decade ago. That Keira was young and star struck and happy to be at that status. Tonight Kate sees a woman that straight out wants to beat her ass. Kate gets nervous and intimidated for a moment. Then Kate bulks up and tries to meet Keira's intensity, but the damage was already done. Keira already saw the laps and the weakness in Kate's eyes. Experienced fight fans and aficionados saw it too.
Following the instructions the women turn and walk back to their respective corners. Kate goes from thinking this would be an easy victory to thinking that taking this match was a mistake. Kate expected to whip Keira's skinny little ass. Now Kate is concerned that hundreds of millions of dollars from future matches against Catherine Zeta Jones and Elizabeth Hurley are about to be loss. Kate turns and looks at Keira from her corner across the ring. She gets determined that she is not going to let Keira take that money from her.
With both competitors embedded in their mind sets the bell rings. Both women charge out of their corners and immediately go to brawling. Both are throwing punches and chops with no regard and little defense. Keira planned to start hot and keep the heat on Kate. The younger competitor knows that she has better conditioning than her older rival. Keira plans to tire Kate out. Kate's strategy is to simply pound the stuffing out of the smaller girl.
Kate's strategy appears to be working the best at first. She kept raining hammering overhead blows down on Keira's skull and shoulders. Keira takes some heavy blows and starts wobbling. That brings a smile to Kate's face. Keira staggers back several steps a little outside of the heavy hit zone. Then Keira quickly lays in three hard machine gun chops across Kate's chest and tits that takes Kate's breath away. Kate has to back off.
Then, like two pit bulls they jump right back and lock up again. They lock up collar and elbow this time. They bear their teeth and struggle against each other. Kate is probably stronger, but Keira held her own to the surprise of many. However Keira knows that she cannot maintain for too long. Keira leans over and bites Kate on her arm. "What the fuck? Are you biting now?” exclaims Kate.
"Hell yeah, and I'll do a lot more than that to win this match!" Keirra answers. As she is talking, Keira puts a foot behind Kate's legs and pushes Kate over backwards and trips her to the mat. Kate lands on her back and Keira is on top of her in an instant. Keira continues her viciousness by clawing at the pinned woman's face. "You can't be the face of the division when I'm through with you." Keira shouts. Kate just bucks real hard and knocks the skinnier girl off of her pretty easily.
Kate crawls away to a safe distance and yells, "You dirty fighting little wench, what is wrong with you?"
"I want to win girl!" Keira answers, followed by swiftly pouncing at Kate. "I Know your prim and proper ass can’t handle a real nasty fight. There will be no fancy kicks and flips tonight. It's just me tearing you to shreds." With that Keira lounges forward and finds Kate's tits mushrooming up out of her corset. Keira takes a bite into Kate's cleavage. Meanwhile her other hand is behind Kate's back pulling and loosening the laces holding Kate's corset on her body.
"Yeooowww!" Kate screams, "You nasty bitch!" Kate knocks the slimmer girl away and stands and retreats again. Kate's corset hangs a lot looser now. Keira approaches Kate with a cheesy smile. Once she's near, Kate grabs Keira's corset and starts yanking the little bitch around like a rag doll. Kate knows that she has to meet this gutter bitch by fighting fire with fire. After Kate is done slinging Keira around helplessly, her corset is nearly falling off.
Keira scowls saying, "Fine with me." and finishes ripping off her corset and tosses it aside."I don't want your blood all over it anyway." Keira comes after Kate and walks into Kate's hand latching out and onto her tiny tit. Keira tries to push Kate's face and knock her off. Kate bites Keira's arm. "You're trying to bite my arm off now! Huh?" Keira angrily snaps.
"You started it!" Kate snaps back. Keira grabs Kate's face again, trying to scratch her. Kate scratches Keira in retaliation.
Lawless shouts, "What the hell are they doing?" from her seat. "Are they trying to fuck up each other's faces?" As the general manager, Lawless has contact with the referee during the match through his ear piece. "Tell them to stop that clawing shit! Neither can be the face of the organization if they scratch them up. Threaten to disqualify them for these gutter tactics."
The referee hears Lawless loud and clear. He interjects himself into the middle of things and breaks the two wildcats apart. He threatens to disqualify them for their biting and clawing and tactics that are not allowed in a professional ring. But the women are bent on tearing each other apart. They go right back to grabbing and pulling hair.
Keira grabs the hair on the back of Kate's head and pulls back as far as she could. Kate's head is bent back to make her look up at the ceiling. "Don't make me hurt you Kate. Lay down and lose with the dignity that you deserve. You're not built for this nasty kind of fighting. I can and will totally humiliate you if you don't lay down. You and your career will be a joke at United Kingdom Fury!"
Kate's knee starts firing up like a piston into Keira's belly continuously. It is more than hard enough to make Keira loose her grip on Kate's hair. "United Kingdom Fury is my home. I was going to allow you to exist in my world but I'm changing my mind." Kate's knee shots make Keira back off. Kate presses and lets her fist fly as fast as lightening. Keira's eyes bling as she ducks and dodges, trying to avoid Kate's onslaught of fists. With Kate's assault coming so quick, hard and from so many different angles, Keira only ends up avoiding a few. At least it was that way until Kate gets over confident and mistakenly wanders into several counter shots.
Keira then reaches out with both hands and grabs a couple of handfuls of Kate's boobs. Momentarily Kate looks shook by the tit grab. That gives Keira a thrill. First, Kate has phenomenal breasts. So two handfuls of Kate's breasts is bound to make man, woman or an alien smile. They certainly give a woman like Keira with lesbian tendencies a tingle. Kate grabs both of Keira's wrists and tries to wrest her molesting hands off of her. Seeing that Keira is enjoying herself too much for Kate to make her let go, Kate counters by grabbing and twisting Keira's nipples. Since Keira's tits are so small, nipple twisting was Kate's best form of attack. Keira answers by driving her knee up into Kate's pussy as she got close. Kate genuinely howls and releases Keira's nipples. Keira looks Kate dead in her eyes with a totally serious expression and says. "You're not as tough or strong as I thought you were. You're not what the fans think you are either."
Kate backs off with her eyes wide and her mouth open, showing that she is indeed being intimidated and bullied by this skinny woman over ten years younger than her. Suddenly Kate roars like a mighty lioness and pounces on top Keira. Kate knocks Keira to the mat and starts swinging, scratching and clawing like a mad woman. "You are exactly who I thought you were; A scrawny bitch with a big mouth with barely half of the talent that you think that you've got.
Keira is getting totally overwhelmed and is without a verbal or physical answer for Kate's outburst. Then the referee physically intervenes again and pulls Kate off of Keira. "Come on this is a wrestling match, not a street fight." The referee struggles with a strong Kate, until Keira slides in an eye poke followed by a thumb to the throat. After Keira's slight of under handedness, the referee is able to pull Kate away.
Keira stands as the referee man handles Kate away. Keira stands in all of her feral glory. She may be slender, but her body is ripped with toned muscles. Her small breasts stand proud on her chest, forever perky like they are made from elastic. Kerira looks at Kate with a deadpan expression again. "Seriously, that's it, that's all that you've got?" Keira finishes her mind games with Kat by saying. "It's time to put an end to this."
Kate stands staring at Keira for a moment like she does not know what to make out of Keira. Kate realizes that Keira is playing a human chess game. She is not intimidated or bullied by Keira this time, but Kate is very curious about how this little match is going to turn out. Then Kate finally answers. "You're definitely not the woman that I thought you were either Keira. You're far better and stronger than I thought you were. Unfortunately that brings out the best in me. You really have no chance."
Keira chuckles before responding, "Everybody says shit like that until they're getting their big tits ripped off their chest."
Keira charges at Kate. The savvy veteran ends Keira's charge by raising her leg and letting Keira run into her foot. Kate swarms over Keira throwing fist. Keira is getting hit but trying to protect herself. Kate taunts, "This is what it's like to fight legends like, Catherine Zeta Jones and Elizabeth Hurley. Let's see if you can raise your game to seriously challenge them!"
"I'm going to do more than you and seriously challenge them. Unlike you, I'm going to kick their asses." Keira starts ripping off a series of body punches into both sides of Kate's ribs. Each mighty blow jolts Kate and makes her retreat one step at a time, until Kate is backed against the ropes. With Kate definitely hurt and looking totally unprepared for Keira's assault, Keira switches to head shots. Kate is rocked and dazed while being totally overwhelmed by the younger princess. Many fans switch sides and rise to their feet to cheer on Keira to continue to throttle Kate. Many get the feeling that they are witnessing something truly special. They feel like they are witnessing a coronation of a new legend. This younger underdog is handing, a certain legend, her ass in a hand basket.
Kate throws her body forward, away from the ropes and into a clench with Keira. The fans see Kate taking deep breaths and regrouping quickly while Keira struggles in a vain attempt to separate herself out of the clench. Finally Kate takes total control, whispering, "You're still not ready." Then in one swift move, she rips Keira into a side headlock, and starts pounding her between the eyes and nose with her fist. Kate's short hammering shots have Keira yelping and squealing like a captured little school girl.
Keira frantically pulls and yanks Kate's hair hoping to escape. She found out that she had to add clawing Kate's eyes, until she finally bites Kate's tit to fight her way out of the simple headlock. When her boob gets bitten again, Kate roars, "Bitch!" Instinctively her right hand lashes out and snatches Keira by the throat and tries to choke the fight out of her while Kate's left hand viciously claws Keira's eyes, nipples or any area that appears vulnerable. Keira's right hand hooks into Kate's mouth and jerk her head like a fish caught on a hook. Keira's left thumb looks for an opening to jab Kate in the eye or throat whenever it is possible.
The referee tries to intervene in this lawless gutter brawl. He first calls for the break then tries to get in between them. Both Kate and Keira use their off hand to violently push him to the mat. He quickly scrambles back to his feet to break up the melee only to be shoved down again. After the referee is shoved down a fourth and fifth time, Lucy Lawless tells him to call the match through his ear piece. "This has gotten out of hand, call the match. Disqualify both of them." Lawless instructs. Already at wits end the referee scrambles off the mat and calls for the bell and a double disqualification draw.
Immediately several security personnel take the ring and physically separate Kate and Keira. Lawless smiles. This was not the match that she wanted or expected but it was entertaining. The crowd is happy despite not having a winner. Lucy Lawless is happy that she has two competitive warriors and excellent pillars to build her division with. Kate and Keira stare darts at each other from across the ring. This is something that they will have to settle another day, and for more money. However they are both too tired to argue with the security to continue tonight. It is a good night for United Kingdom Fury and this is only the beginning.
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TO KEIRA KNIGHTLEY
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